what do you think of my situation ???

Question

i have started a new job and my boss gave me a raise the first week and told me not to tell anybody else.

i am happy about that but i don't understand how i got a raise my first week ??

and i always catch him staring at me and watching me sometimes on the job.

also, when i hand him something or give him a piece of paper his fingers always happen to brush mines everytime.

i really want this job but i don't want to get involved in any drama

does he have bad intentions
what do you think of this..????

Answer 1

Yes. He has intentions.
Whether they are bad intentions remains to be seen.
Don't play into his hands. It is bad policy to 'play' at work.

Answer 2

Sorry, hon, but I'm not quite believing you. Never be anything but professional in your dress and demeanor. Ask him why he gave you a raise; be direct and forthright, and say thank you. Next time you catch him staring at you, ask him if something is wrong. Stop playing the innocent and helpless victim, and stop looking for bogeymen in the closet.

Unless they're new to their own jobs, managers tend to be very aware of the kind of trouble they can get into if they pay their employees the wrong kind of attention. Smart people do not jeopardize their jobs because they think they can intimidate a subodinate into a little hanky-panky on the side. I've heard too many stories like yours that have turned out to be untrue not to be suspicious. Sorry. Just because you think a monster is under the bed doesn't mean one is there.

Keep your mouth shut until you have absolute proof - that means keep a log of what happened, when, where, and what was said. If you go to Personnel with unfounded suspicions, you will absolutely ruin your career with this company.

Answer 3

I've had this happen with a boss, but to a greater degree where his intentions were clear and when I set a clear boundary he pouted, but backed off and I kept the job. He didn't bother me again. In fact, we became friends later.
I think you need to talk to your boss in a way that will make it clear that you love your job and you will do a good job but you aren't interested in anything beyond work and you've felt uncomfortable around him when he ______, _______ and _______ (whatever behaviors made you uncomfortable) and you would like him to stop doing those things.
He may even apologize and say he didn't mean to make you feel that way and then back off from that sort of behavior.
If he retaliates against you, you have some options which vary according to what he has done that can be substantiated. If your workplace is big enough to have a Human Relations Dept., you could lodge a complaint there.
I'd recommend the boundary setting first, though. Sometimes that's enough to keep your job and back the person off.

Answer 4

Why don't you ask him to tell you his reason for giving you a raise? His answer may shed light on this situation. You need to find out what his intentions really are. If he is showing you some sort of favortism, it could backfire later on, especially if you don't "reciprocate" in ways he thinks you should. So best then, to be clear on this now. Ask him for his reason for the raise. Evaluate carefully his reply. If it sounds suspicious to you, perhaps it's time to start looking for a new job. You also have the option of reporting this behavior to someone who has authority to do something about it. If he's the owner, you may need to get in touch with an outside agency to report this. But in any case, if he's acting inappropriately and it's making you feel uncomfortable, you should definitely address this issue in some way.

Answer 5

He is guilty of sexual harrassment. The questions that you have to decide for yourself are wether or not you are ok with that or not. If your ok with that, take the raise, and let him flirt with you, and there might be more raises in the future, but it could go to the point where he tries to have a realtionship with you. If your ok with that, let it go, take the raise, and be happy.

If your not ok with that, go to human resources, forget about the raise, and stand by your principles no matter what happens.

Answer 6

it happened to me before.. if he is single, fine but if he is married you have to beware of his actions towards you. sometimes when your new with the job and young, some boss try to test if you are a flirt and if you compliment his advances that is a point against you. some bosses just like to flirt esp if you are new. just ignore him and don't show that you are pissed off because for him its normal. i suggest do your job the best as you can. it is part of work adjustment. keep your spirit right. honestly analyze and correct yourself where necessary. then, go on doing your job to the best of your ability. God bless you...

Answer 7

i think that maybe you sohuld confront him and ask him why he gave you the raise. If he doesnt seem suspicious but you still ant to know ore, maybe ask some of your coworkers what they know about him. If you do like him then maybe you should go for a different ob because like you said you dont want any drama and that would be bad.

hope i helped
<3

Answer 8

WRITE IT ALL DOWN! Dates, times, locations and what he did. Trust me, if you need this information in the future, it will be very handy.

In the meantime, you should confront him about anything that makes you uncomfortable- in a professional way. Directly, but discreetly. If you show any sign of fear, he will manipulate you more than he already has.

Good luck.

Answer 9

It doesn't sound like a good place to work. Behavior not becoming of professionals. Also - who authorised him to give you an immediate raise? Go with your gut instinct - get a real job somewhere better.

Answer 10

I WOULD GIVE IT SOME TIME, AND DURING THAT TIME TALK W/OTHER EMPLOYEES POSSIBLY THAT YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND OR WHATEVER BUT DONT TELL THEM WHAT YOU HAVE PRINTED HERE. IN OTHER WORDS HANDLE IT IN AN ADULT MANNER WITH REPORTING IT TO A GRIEVANCE COMMITTEE OR SOME SUCH PLACE AS A LAST RESORT. BE PROFESSIONAL AND HOPEFULLY ALL WILL BE WELL INCLUDING THE BOSS.