Can I get sole custody of my child, even though I've been diagnosed with severe depression?

Question

I recieve social security for my depression, I'm seeing a therapist, and taking medication; but I've never neglected my child. My therapist has me bring her into our sessions, just to get an idea of our relationship and interaction; and she's said that I'm an execellent mother, that my child is well taken care of and growing just fine ( emotionally and physically). Now that my husband and I are divorcing he's threatening to take sole custody of her and I'm worried that because of my disability he might acutally win. Does anyone know what the odds are of me losing physical custody of my daughter in this situation?

Answer 1

get a letter of recommendation from your therapist. ask her if she would be willing to testify at trial if it came to it. so you have any record of hospitalization? any relaspes? any documentation? how does it affect your daughter? these are the issues that will come up. he has to prove to the judge that you are a harm to your child. as you are on disability, you are available for your daughter 24/7. if he has a job, he's not.
a custody evaluator will talk with your daughter to see what she has to say and if she feels subject to your depression.
a judge will not just take his word for it that you are nutts.
keep in mind, because he had no problem with you being a mother to begin with, all of a sudden declaring you unfit because you are no longer sleeping with him, doesn't fly in court.
even drug addicts can get custody as long as they are getting the help they need and are showing progress in their recovery.
i had a DUI and am not employed. i still got custody. your infliction is not self induced.

good luck.

edit. someone tell "some female" to stuf it. being depressed does not make you a bad mother. often times it is a temperary issue. it is being dealt with. a bad mother would not take her meds, would not acknowledge her affliction, and would not do anything about it, nor would she care if she had custody of her kids or not.

Answer 2

No, he can't get sole custody! He can get joint custody with you as the custodial parent. That means that the child will live with you and he will get the child every other weekend. The joint part just means that he can get medical care if necessary, that he can sign things when the child is with him. That is all he can do. It's very common to have joint custody, the courts feel that this is in the best interest of the child. It is hard to get sole custody and if he files for this he will lose, as the court will look unfavorably on the parent who is trying to take the other parent out of the child's life. Get an attorney and sue for divorce this way he will have to pay for your attorney. He deserves this for trying to be a jerk about custody. You being home all the time will work in your favor.

Answer 3

If you are taking good care of your child and providing her with a stable home environment, there is no reason for you to lose custody of your child. If you have a history of being unable to care for her during your marriage, then this could possibly affect custody. Either way, in a divorce you can expect you and your husband to share custody of her and for her to live with you and spend weekends and one evening a week with him, and half of her summer vacations and holidays with him as well. Custody arrangements in a divorce are usually made so that each parent sees the child about half the time. Courts recognize that it is almost always in the child's best interest for the child to see both of her parents as much as possible, and courts also recognize that there is no such thing as a perfect parent. You would have to be a total loser to not have custody of your child. Think of Britney Spears.

Answer 4

Ummmm no! I suffer from depressive bipolar disorder. and I have two kids, and have sole custody of both. If your doc says you are stable, then you will be fine. Unless you are smoking crack, meth, shoothing heroin and always off ur butt drunk, then you will have no problem. you soon to be ex is just trying to scare you.
One thing is you have to have a good support system, when you have your bad days. But your doc can back you up on that.
Also the fact that you are on ssd, means you can be a full time mother. that your child will not be in child care while you work to support yourself. that's a plus.
good luck

Answer 5

I would assume that this is some kind of physiological problem, yet you say you are seeing a therapist. If you are depressed due to psychological/emotional issues you should only take medication as a way to allow you to work through issues in therapy, not as a lifestyle.

If you have some kind of chemical imbalance then as long as you are stable on the meds (and have been stable for some time) I see no reason for you not to parent your child.

Answer 6

If you are actively receiving treatment for your problem, there should not be any issues. There may be a stipulation in your agreement that states if you relapse with your treatment, you may be going back to court or have custody taken away. So, its very very important to continue with therapy and medications, not only for your own health, but for your daughter. (I'm sure you already know that - depression affects everyone if it goes untreated)

Because you are taking care of your illness, you should be on an even playing field with your husband as far as that goes. Everything else is up to the court. (If he mentions your illness, you have documents and proof that shows that it is not of importance to the case.)

Good luck.

Answer 7

Basically, if you're able to provide for your child emotionally and create a proper environment for your child despite your supposed depression, then you're not depressed enough to be on disability, get a job.

Now, if you think you still need that disability then by default you're a bad mother. Depression is harmful to children. Look at the research on the effects of a depressed parent on a child. You're a horrible mother if you think you can create a proper environment for your child when you're apparently so depressed you can't work. Besides, even if you are just leeching that makes you a bad mother too. A good mother is a mother who works (except in cases where she may actually need the disability for physical problems only because disability for psychological problems excludes someone from being a good mother)!

Your therapist isn't going to call you a bad mother to your face or tell you about what effect your depression has on your child because that's just going to upset you and then maybe you'll find yourself another therapist and that's a loss of money for her.

EDIT: People are answering as if you're not really that depressed, as if the medications and the therapy are making you at least somewhat normal, but you said you're on disability, meaning that even with medications and therapy you're unable to properly function therefore the question remains, how can you even begin to think that your depression isn't harming your daughter??

Answer 8

have you every tried to kill yourself? if not, then as long as you take your meds and make a point to go to your appts, then you should have nothing to worry about. the only thing that i see a judge doing is making you share custody of your child. a lot of state are doing away with sole custody to the mother and making it more joint....they are now realizing that a child needs their father. i would hire a really good lawyer and talk to him about it. your husband will try to pull out every bad thing that has ever happened...that's just what they do. remember, that when you go to court, you have to be the bigger person....don't let your husband make you have any outburst in court...the judge will not like it.

Answer 9

Forget all of that and make sure you have a really good attorney. That's your only hope.

Good luck.