Is going to a bar with an attractive coworker after work considered cheating?

Question

Yes, I'm attracted to this guy, but I love my husband dearly. Is it considered cheating if I go out to a bar with this guy after work (we get out at midnight) for an hour? I know nothing will happen, but I wonder if others will see it the same way.

Answer 1

You're playing with fire, and you know that it isn't cheating... just yet... but it can be if you let it.

If you're looking outside of your marriage, there is something missing within it.

Answer 2

Personally, I don't think it matters what I think. You need to ask yourself a few questions here though.

1.Why do you ask a question as this, but then justify it by saying nothing will happen?
2.Does your husband know you go out after work with this coworker of yours?
3.What do you think the answer to your question is?
4.Why are you in a bar at midnight with your attractive coworker anyway?
5.How would you feel if your hubby were out hanging out with an attractive coworker in the middle of the night, in a bar?

Answer 3

As long as your not doing anything with this guy then no it's not considered cheating. People might start thinking something is going on but don't Liston to them. Remember as long as you know nothing is going on then it's not cheating. cheating would be like if you and this guy kiss deeply or go to a hotel an get you freak on. It's OK if your attracted to him but you have to keep in mind that you love your husband more and how it would affect him if you were with another man doing thing you should be doing with him.An if your husband gets suspicious of what you do after work take him with you to another bar. But i recommend that you don't go out to a bar with this guy after work. You never know when you'll drink more than you can handle and wind up in a hotel with him the next morning.

Answer 4

I wouldn't consider it cheating. However, you would be placing yourself into a situation in which infidelity is more likely to occur. If you truly love your husband, do the right thing and don't put yourself in that position. Don't spend "alone" time with a man you shouldn't have.
It is the "perception" that others may get that is the issue. A married woman out with a man not her husband, no matter how innocent leaves room for questioning.
Go home and vent your frustration on your husband, he will love you all the more and not even know why!

Answer 5

Have you told your husband you are going, or is he one of the others that might not see it as innocent??? It isn't cheating to meet a friend for drinks etc. but you are attracted to this man, so be honest with yourself about it. Why even consider it? And I disagree, you don't know that nothing will happen, you think so, but one casual meeting for drinks just may lead to another and another....eventually..... you can't predict what might happen. If you really have no interest in starting anything, then make sure other friends are along.

Answer 6

In the real world "Perception is Reality"!

What perception do you want to leave with your friends or family if they see or hear about you out late at the bar with another man. Especially if your marriage is young.

What is it about you that needs the company/attention of a attractive single man over your husband waiting at home for you?

If you put half the energy you spent on this single man into your marriage you could have a "forever" partner. Why did you get married if you need the attention of another man?

Nothing good EVER comes of a bar! Go home where you belong!

Answer 7

It's only considered cheating in places like Saudi Arabia where you would be flogged or stoned.

In the civilized world, I would consider it cheating only if your husband doesn't know about it. Do you tell your husband - "I am planning to go to with after work. Is that OK?" - if so I'd say it's fine. If you tell your husband "I am planning to go to with SOME PEOPLE after work" then you are not being honest and that to me is cheating.

Answer 8

Bad idea. Nothing will happen.
Oh, I am going for a drink with this atractive guy from work. I had a couple stiff ones and the next thing I know its 8am the next morning and everything below my waist hurts, and I am in a hotel room. My cell phone is full of messages from my husband and it looks like I paid for the room with the check card from our joint account. There is blood on the sheets, my panties are missing and.....

Answer 9

Even if you do nothing wrong...put yourself in hubbies shoes..what if he had attraction to female co-worker and took her to a bar for little boozing time...that MIGHT tell you he is trying to get in her pants! You would probably (I say probably)...want to go kick her patuty!...& think of her as a SLUT...anyway..now refocus on your self and ask your self this: IS THE MARRIAGE WORTH LOSING? DID you get HUBBIES PERMISSION ON THIS OUTING? Ask his opinion first...IF Hubby says NO! Then don't do it! PICK YOUR battles in a marriage...another male co-worker is not a battle that should be in the marriage. STAY HOME OR GO OUT ON A date with HUBBY!
PS. if hubby says he is fine with it, and it does not bother him, then he will pull out the Ace card later when He wants to go out...DONT GIVE HIM THE AMMO!
Q:
WHAT GOOD COMES FROM A BAR ANYWAY? I have yet to see anything!

Answer 10

It is getting close. It can be considered emotional cheating. If I was your husband I would not appreciate it at all. You are not supposed to put yourself in those types of situations if you value your marriage, go out in groups or don't go.

Answer 11

It is not cheating to have a drink. It is not right if your husband does not know. It is also not wise since you are attracted to him. Do not worry what others think, it is not for them to judge.