Do you think anyone getting married before they have lived together are complete idiots?

Answer 1

i agree with living with someone before u marry them for at least a year, so u will be able to see the person in the good times as well as the bad times. u will see how they handle stress, and arguments, and what type of person they are, based on their actions.

Answer 2

Living together does not guarantee a happy marriage. I am proof of that. Studies show that couples that live together before marriage are more likely to divorce. However.......it might be because couples that don't live together first are more religious. And that might be why they chose to get married before moving in together.
In any event.....what I found out was as soon as wedding was over she was a different person. I am 48 and I doubt I would live with a woman without being married to her again.

Answer 3

No I don't think they're complete idiots because it's not always possible to live with someone before getting married. If you come from a specific background, then it's not even possible to live together out of wedlock. Therefore, I think that people who get married without living together first is pretty normal. I only try to tell them what the natural tendencies of couples who first live together are so that they're not too shocked!

Answer 4

By the time you have reached the "Getting Married" stage, you'd expect to know each other pretty well. WRONG.

Living together gives you experiences and joys and heartaches never before had.

It is a good basis to start and establish can you really live under the one roof. Because you don't really know otherwise. Once youre married then tough.

Answer 5

I think living together is the best preparation for marriage. If you get easily annoyed with socks lying around and didn´t know your partner does it because he always quickly tidied up before you got there - I see the first fight already coming, and only because of petty things.

I would not call the couple complete idiots, but not exactly sensible. Sorry to those quoting studies, I prefer to get names and numbers instead of "I have read...", but yes, I know this is about quick answers. :)

It takes you some time to get annoyed by the petty things.
So, it could well be that if you haven´t lived together yet and get married straightaway, the "I will ignore your socks on the floor because I love you" -period counts from the date of marriage, and not the day you moved together first - which would mean, you don´t start fighting in the first week, but only six months after getting married. ;)

Answer 6

The decision to have sex or make love to someone before you marry them is a serious one, but it depends upon two factors as to whether it can be consider right or wrong. The two factors that appear to matter are your attitudes towards both sex and marriage.

Those who feel that making love is a sacred act that can only happen between two people who are in a secure relationship have a very different attitude to those who feel that sex is a kind of sport, used for recreation and pleasure, obviously those people do not consider sex as sacred and so waiting until after marriage seems pointless.

However, for those who consider intercourse as special and marriage also, they might feel that waiting until the bond of marriage is obtained before the physical bond is established, then waiting is something special.

Wrong is a very relative term, relative to your values and the way you live your life. There is nothing wrong with making love to someone before marriage, nor is there anything wrong with waiting

Answer 7

Absolutely not - if that was the case, I'd be an idiot. I married my first husband without either one of us ever living with anyone else or each other and we ended up divorcing after a year and half (we dated 7 years). Now I am in a happy, healthy, relationship where we live together (getting ready to be engaged) but it would be a very long engagement. It's like living together with the hope of a solid committment, but not in a big hurry to do it... why try to fix something that isn't broken?

Answer 8

nope. in fact, i think getting married first can be a great benefit. face it...we all have annoying habits. when your married your more apt work out those differences then let then escalate to the point where you just break up. my husband may annoy me when he leaves dirty plates all over the house but im not gonna nag or leave. its just not that big of a deal in the long run.
nearly everyone i know who has lived with their boyfriend/girlfriend prior to marriage has broken up. thats not to say it doesnt work for some people but me personally..ive been on both sides of the fence and can truly say that it is more fun and special living together after marriage.

Answer 9

Depends on how long the relationship has been established. Is it a strong bond, do they know eachother well? I dated my now wife for 2 years before we moved in together and five more before we got married in 2005.

Answer 10

How can you marry someone if you don't live together first. You don't know how he/she will react to the situation. You don't know how it will work. Living together is a big thing in a relationship. If you can't live together like a couple should it will not work. You already love each other now live together to see if your really compatible.

Answer 11

Years ago that is how we did it. Yes it is a great risk. I was lucky we are compatible. Marvellous together. Trying out is the only thing I agree about in this day and age. You can walk out if it's no good.
When children are involved I believe in father and mother relationships for the child. Unless exception circumstances arise, like abuse from the father or drunk every night etc.,
I say abuse from father it could of course be the mother.