child support?

Question

I have met my real dad twice in my life. I have been told that he had never payed any child support, and when my mom remarried-he was about to give the money but my step dad said that he didn't want his "drug money". I am 20 now and find myself at financial hard times.

My question is: Can i approach my real dad and ask him for money relating to unpaid child support? If so, how much can I ask for? Does anyone think I will get any money?

Please help me.....

Answer 1

You don't need anyone's permission to talk to your birth dad and ask him for some money if you need some.

If you are asking about suing him in court for back child support, you may win and you may not, but you will certainly ruin any chance you will ever have for any kind of real relationship with him if you do so.

Answer 2

He wasn't obliged to pay child support if he was told not to. Therefore he doesn't "owe" you any unpaid child support since such a thing doesn't exist; any money he offered towards child support was refused as was any future money he might offer in this respect. Since he was told no child support from him would be accepted, then no child support had to be paid by him, so there is no unpaid child support. Since your mother and stepfather placed you and him in this situation, then they are responsible for the lack of extra money, so you should speak to them about them making good on it.

Also, it sounds like all you want your "real" dad for is money. I won't get into the morals of that for fear of getting reported.

Edit: In case you can't wrap your head around what I said then try to imagine the following scenario. Let's say that you live with someone and offer to pay rent while you're there. They refuse your offer and tell you they don't want any money for rent from you ever. Years go by before you finally move out and shortly afterwards that person tells you they want the money you owe them in rent. Well, do you really think you owe them rent? Not only did they refused accepting any money from you, but you may have then gone onto spending any money you would have given them because you had no obligation to give it to them by their refusal. Why should there be any money available for them to get since it was then yours to spend? And why should you have to place yourself into a situation in order to give them something they had refused, and that refusal come at a time when you could have given it to them?

Answer 3

I myself pay child support willingly and graciously. Now that I have patted myself on the back, here is my real view on this. Child support is for the raising and care of the child. Your mother, depending on whether your step father adopted you, whether your father gave up his rights to you, she has the right to back support. I as a father, do not think I owe my daughter money in any way shape or form. But because she is a child and cannot be expected to fend for herself, I willingly give her mother the money she needs to care for her, when she is not living with me. So is it your fathers money you want, or to have a relationship with your father? If my daughter just came around for the money, and was old enough to work, I would tell her to get a job. Sounds tough, but it is all part of growing up. You father never owed you a penny, he may owe your mother back support, but not you. I feel very sad for your father, after all this time, sounds like the only thing you want from him is money. Remember, if your father had his rights taken away, or if another adopted you, or he gave his rights to you up, there may be little or nothing your mother can get from him, and about the only thing you can get for yourself would be a job.

Answer 4

The child support is for your mother to take care of you.

Legally you can not get.

You can ask your dad to give it to you but if he has not been allowed to see you or have a relationship he might look at it as you only coming around for money WHICH IT SOUNDS LIKE THAT IS WHAT IS GOING ON HERE.

He might give it to you and he might not.

You are intelligent and can make it in life with out your dad's, mom or step dad's money.

Answer 5

There's a company that advertises on TV that they will collect your back child support - with a fee, I'm sure. Here's one that I found on the web (I think it's the same company):

http://www.supportkids.com/?source=google_paid_childsupport_exact&gclid=CKGg46Hu7o8CFRsFagodvkR8Mg

You probably need the support order and some other information. But, it may be a way for you to approach the subject with him - "Dad, I need some help and since you never paid child support, maybe you can give me a hand." If he says no, you do have options for getting it.

I have a friend who, in his 20's, placed a lien on his father's property sale in another state and collected from the profit his father made from the sale before the father ever saw a dime.

Good luck!

Answer 6

There's no guarantee that you'll win a court case. Especially if your step-dad rejected payment in the past.

You may permenantly damage any chance of relationship with your father. Also, if you lose the case the judge could force you to pay your father's legal fees. So, be very careful when opening this can of worms.

My advice would be to get a second job.

Answer 7

You have no claim whatsoever to monies from your "real" dad. The money that he was supposed to pay in child support is due to your mother, not you.
Your biological father has no legal obligation to give you any money, but his guilt about not having paid child support may prompt him to help you out.

Answer 8

No, you can't.

If there was a way to collect back child support, the money would go to your mother. She is the one that supported you without his contributions. She is legally entitled to it.

Like, fat chance anyway.

Your mom should have taken the money when it was offered and set it up in a bank account for you - in your name. That's what I did with my kids child support money.

When they turned 19 and were out of high school, I gave the money to them. It helped them buy their cars, pay insurance and helped with college expense.

Answer 9

YES YOU CAN, BUT ALSO TRY TO GET A LONG TERM THING GOING SO YOU CAN TALK AS ADULTS NOW.........
HE SHOULD WANT TO, BUT YOU CANNOT FORCE THE ISSUE, IF YOU ARE ON OK TERMS , EASE THE QUESTION AND TRY TO WORK IT OUT....
.....

Answer 10

Don't!