Am I Too Nice?

Question

i've been wondering this for a while. usually when people rough house with me and if i end up getting a small cut or get a tiny bruise i forgive them. i dont get angry and go berzerk or anything. sometimes when people get really angry at me(friends at school) and they do something mean(saying mean things, shoving, ya know that kinda stuff) i tend to forgive them and forget all about it.
i have never fought with anyone, and i(for some reason) forgive every one who has done anything to me.
so what i'm asking is, am i too nice? is that a bad thing? does god want me to be this nice or less nice?
thanks in advance!
(i am 15)

i never yell at a conflict, i always handle problems calmly, also i would never ever strike my hand upon somone. so again, am i being too nice, or is it maturity? :P

i also believe what everyone says unless i know it's an obvious lie. am i naive?

i'm a boy......

Answer 1

i don't think its a bad thing, i wish i could take more things with a grain of salt

Answer 2

When U R roughing around with the guys and U get hurt (if U R a guy) then U should expect 2 get hurt. If U R a girl this is the way alot of teens end up in the wrong position, and ends up in pregnancy. This happened 2 me 3 times!!! What do u do that ends up with them so angry??? Maybe U deserve it and U R actually getting off easy. Some kids R using guns these days. But if sometimes U R being nice & U don't do anything 2 deserve it then U need 2 find new friends. It is great 2 B a nice person as along as you arent holding in anger that will add up until U explode on the wrong person, Don't let any1 use u 4 what they can get off U (like cash or something). IF U DON'T WANT 2 ROUGHHOUSE, TELL THEM TO KNOCK IT OFF - IF THEY R FRIENDS THEY WILL STILL B YOUR FRIENDS THE NEXT DAY.

PS HANDLING CONFLICTS THIS WAY IS VERY MATURE - DON'T WALK AWAY FEELING HURT - & u SHOULD BELIEVE WHAT YOUR FRIENDS OR FAMILY TELL U UNLESS THEY GET PROVEN WRONG THEN U KNOW WHO 2 TRUST.

Answer 3

The real question is do these things bother you. I was a 15 year old long time ago and would put up with a lot just to look cool or stay under the radar. I will tell you that in college people do not rough house, shove, yell or strike anyone. You will possible go to jail for these things. I think you need to find out who you are and figure out if you want these things to happen to you. If you don't want these things to happen to you then don't let them; this doesn't mean you are mean either. Try to be yourself and who cares if you are on the radar. Also about being naive, that is more complicated. I am still trying to answer that question myself. The only difference is I don't blame myself if I am lied to.

Answer 4

Your behavior is a good one. I wish there where more people that where as calm and understanding as you are. However, there is such a thing as being too nice. I don't know if you fall into that category because I don't know you. Anyways, the problem is not being too nice. The problem is that people equate being nice to being a push over. You will notice that when a nice guy asks for something people tend to not care. That has happened to me many times. You go ask somebody to do what they are supposed to and you get harass. Now some ****** asks and everybody get things done. Also, people try to take advantage of you if you are too nice because they forget about showing respect. Is natural for people to do this. The thing is that you you have to take things into context. If you guys where rough housing then it is expected for somebody to get a bruise here and there. I would not make such a big deal out of that. I mean if you don't like the bruise then don't rough house. However there are times that people try to push you when uncall for. This is not acceptable. I myself follow a policy that my mom though me but then I extended it a bit. Maybe too much sometimes. The policy is, by default I'm nice. You shall treat everybody with respect no questions asked no exceptions. If however, they decided to disrespect you then you have to be strong and defend yourself. Show them that you are not a push over and that bad behavior can and will be confronted with bad behavior. Usually people then tend to back off because they know that they where wrong to begin with. They where the offenders so you are just correcting the situation. You know just let them know that they are wrong. Difference between me and my mom is That I am more vengeful. My policy is OK let them know that you will not stand for it. However, if they do persist then they are giving you full permission for you to destroy them. The logic behind this is that you give people many chances to do the right thing. You tell them to stop, you show them their errors. However, even with this knowledge, they keep pushing. AT This point they have no excuse because by this point they did not do it by mistake. They are aware meaning they are being mean because they think they can. So, I say, OK you had your opportunities and you willingly did not take them. Now is my turn and you have given me full permission to do anything short of murder. My anger will be shown ed in an incremental fashion meaning that it just gets worst until you are destroyed and humiliated. Yes it sounds mean but, hey I give people more chances than anybody else in their life would or have. I have done this to various people who for reason or another though they could run over e. One being my wife. They did not like the outcome. Needless to say my wife and I now have adult arguments. This means we talk about things and try to understand each other as opposed her trying to imposed her Willl. I have done the same thing to some friends. It seems that people need to be reminded of their place every now and then. Yes, even I need a reminder every now and then.

The short story is that it is great to be nice and what you described does not sound like you are being too nice. It sounds like you are a calm smart person that knows how to deal with problems. However, the day wil come when people confuse that niceness for weakness so be prepare to correct them.

Answer 5

I would call you a push over, sounds like you accept others behavoir as something to live with, instead of getting angery you forgive it is a nice quailty, Most people can't forgive, or it takes them a really long time, Just stand up for yourself a bit more, I say challenge everything and accept nothing, always ask why, and never settle for because,

Answer 6

Its probably your upbringing thats reflected in the instances quoted and probably you have been made to understand that even after a fight or things like that it gives a bad taste for the rest of life , I will say you are patient and grown for a girl of your age more mature than you should have been but a nice human being ,good to be known to if that does some good I will want be a friend despite age gap

Answer 7

I wouldn't say you are too nice or that being nice is a bad quality. It is good to avoid controversy, but you should hang around people that aren't pushing you around either.

Sometimes people take it too far. Talk to your best friend about it. Stick together.

Hey, that second question is tough to handle the truth. People do lie even when it's not obvious.

Answer 8

It shows that you are mature enough to ignore the usual stuff and forgive your friends maybe because you know that deep down they are not bad or mean... but again a word of caution it is good to be nice and mature but not to the extent that people start taking your advantage...
you do seem to be nice..:-)

Answer 9

your asking ppl what God wants for you, you must be nuts!

but you seem to have that level of calmness that very few people actually possess. you can shrug off the little things and forgive others for their mistakes. if it is maturity then you have mature very nicely. it doesn't make you naive that you believe what everyone says it just makes you trusting

Answer 10

Your in the middle of nice and in the middle of mean. But you could be a little meaner at some points but not like get into a fight and stuff. But still take this advice.

Answer 11

I can relate and I am 20 yrs older ,however the one thing is you need to make sure people don't take advantage of you . Unfortunately this has always been a problem for me. Stay true to yourself-always do what you think is best