My husband's mate wants to be friends.?

Question

My husband's mate has been trying to contact me and asking me out. He says he really likes me and doesnot want more than a friendship. What shall I do?
He is one of those guys who saw me fully naked while i was getting out of the pool when my hubby and his mates came frm work, and i was not expecting there visit.
Since then, me and my husband are not together the way we were, although its getting better now.

I personally think he doesnt want just a friendship, But i think i am muture enough to handle myself. He seems nice as a person and im thinking of giving him a go. I am mostly alone at home, dont have friends in this town. Sometimes i really feel alone.
I need second opinion.... (You can see my other questions to know the whole background)

Answer 1

I dont think you are mature enough to handle this situation. To think that your husband are not comfortable about what had happened, and you think HE DOESNT WANT JUST FRIENDSHIP, why are you giving him a go? I think you want OUT from your marriage.
If you are really feeling lonely, go out and make friends with gals who are in the same situation as yours, then all these lonely craps is nothing.

Answer 2

I imagine her husband would be upset unless he has a certain kind of relationship with your friend. I applaud your husband for being able to tell you his sexual desires so openly and I applaud you for considering them. The problem I have with these kinds of indulgences is the resentment between you and your friend which can crop up if it's not watched carefully. First off, are YOU interested in having sex with your friend? Threesomes are called that because all parties should be playing with everybody else. If your husband is supposed to simply have sex with your friend while you watch and don't participate, that isn't really a threesome. That's just you being a voyeur or a chaperon. If that's what you three want-- for you to watch and not touch, then that's fine, but unless you find watching your husband shag your friends sexually satisfying, this can cause problems with your relationships with both of them later on. If you're okay with watching but not touching, or directing but not touching, or touching along with the two of them, then you still need permission from her husband-- or invite him along and have a foursome. Bottom line, there's a lot of talking that needs to go on before any of this can move forward. All four parties involved need to sign off on what's about to happen or this can end badly in many, many ways.

Answer 3

Firstly I would say 'TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS' you feel this guy isn't only after friendship....I think you are right....so therefore...STAY AWAY from him.

I think just like all the other people have said....guy friends to a married woman is TABOO!

I think you need to confide in your hubby more and spend more time with him...and honestly, make it abundantly clear to this "friend" of your hubby's that you are not interested.

Work on your marriage...it's worth saving, think of all the reasons why you married your hubby in the first place.

S.

Answer 4

Well if you dont want to work things out with your husband.Then go for it.Your bf mate really wants to sleep with you.
Not a very good friend in my book.I would strongly advise against it.Friends are like the forbidden fruit.If you do it.Most likely you will regret it.
Lonliness sometimes can give us very poor judgement.No excuse for sleeping with your mates friend.
If you want any chance of working things out DONT DO IT.Tell that jerk to stop calling you.He is not much of a friend.If you are lonely find someone that doesnt know either one of you.It is alot easier that way.
I hope this helps.For your husband sake and yours dont do it.

Answer 5

Please a man who has seen you naked and wants to be friends. He is a liar, why doesn't ask your husband if you can be your friend let him know that he has been calling behind his back, that is not a friend. I would tell your husband, he is just looking to get you in bed. Don't be fooled. He is only being nice to get in you bed. If you are feeling lonely talk with your husband about these issues, if you feel things are getting better. Don't make things worse.

Answer 6

Spend your energy making your marriage what you want it to be or get a divorce but don't cheat and have guy friends. Playing around with your husband's mate is gross and morally repugnant. Be true to your values. Use your head. If you need a friend, hire a counselor or find a girl.

Answer 7

I would not like it if my wife made the decision it sounds like you are trying to justify for yourself. Also, I would never contact one of my mates wives to ask them if they wanted to go out. That is pretty messed up. But not as messed up as you deciding to give it a go. This is the sort of thing that can make a husband go biserck. So unless you want to see how well your husband handles jealous rage, you should tell his mate to go pound salt.

Answer 8

Um sorry he wants into your pants. That is clear.

And I THINK you know it.

I think you keep revisting this question because you are flattered that he wants you and you want him to show it.

The fact that you bring problems with your husband into this only makes it worse. Stay away from this guy and pay attention to your hubby.

Answer 9

If you want to fix and improve your marriage with your husband, you should not be looking on having an affair. This action will certainly lead to a divorce.

Answer 10

He wants to see u naked again. Sounds like u also might want him to. though ur not just saying it. Like u said ur matuer enough. do what u want . even if it's being naked with him. just be honest with urself