Me and this guy aren't official yet but we pretty much are together.He is 3 hrs away which is why he doesn't want to make it official until were close enough too.He tells me "what if I want to hang out with someone and go to the movies ect. he says its not a sexual thing more so a friendship cause he doesnt know anyone..am I wrong for not wanting this?I told him I know what "hanging out" leads too..He says its not like that ..I tried to say what if it was me wanting to do it and he said I would say if it makes you happy..and then he ends it with I dont even know what I am asking because I want do it because even if I wanted too I feel like I am cheating on you..I said wtf I dont understand what ur wanting from me..he says to make me not feel like I am going to break your heart if I do it.. does anyone have a clue what is going on here??Should I just let him go with other people to places and stuff? Maybe I am blowing it up bigger than it is..im 25 he's 29. so u know.
2007-11-20 23:57:18 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I want to do the right thing.. but also look out for my heart as well...why doesn't he understand that!
2007-11-20 23:57:52 · update #1
By the way why is he just not happy hanging out with his guy friends??
2007-11-20 23:58:45 · update #2
he's what i call a manwhore. he want it all and u deserve better
2007-11-21 00:53:25 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is being honest with you; the fact he says he doesn't want to make you feel like he is breaking your heart says tons. Think he cares for you very much but is not yet wishing an 'official' relationship. I hate to say this, but he sounds as if he is not into you as much as you are into him. He is going to go out with other people wither you say it is okay or not; he is just letting you know where he stands on the relationship.
If it is meant to become something more, it will happen over time. He is telling you that it is okay with him if you go out with others, as he is going to do. Age has nothing to do with any of it; it is all a matter of the heart.
2007-11-21 08:04:52 · answer #2 · answered by pussycat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why isn't he happy just hanging out with his guy friends? Well, many people prefer the company of the opposite sex even if it's just friendly. Personally, unless there it is mixed company, I absolutely hate spending time with 'the girls', I'd rather thrust sharpened pencils into my eye socket.
He wants to date other people because he's not committed to you. A boyfriend is a boyfriend, but unless you've had the let's be monogamous talk, he is free to date other women. You have some long distance thing, why should he commit? And I bet you've never even met the guy.
2007-11-21 08:08:46 · answer #3 · answered by some female 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I was in a committed relationship I would expect my boyfriend not to hang out and date other women. If he wants to see other people, whether he says "it is not like that" or not, it is not cool at all. Perhaps the relationship is less committed on his side than yours. He wants to hang with the girls since you aren't there. At least he was semi-honest about it. It is up to you whether you want to be serious with a guy who obviously does not get what being in a committed relationship means. Tell him you will do the same with guys in your area and see if he thinks it is so benign. I wouldn't trust him an inch.
2007-11-21 08:03:19 · answer #4 · answered by whereRyou? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'd forget about this guy... he says "it's not like that" which actually means... he is probably kissing the girl or more... but, intends to dump her when you live closer together... men (some women) generally don't like to be alone... so long distance relationships never work... and I mean never... I'd forget about this guy... I really, really would! you are not wrong, he's wrong for going out w/ this girl on the side... even if they are supposedly "just friends"... I'd break up w/ him... don't settle for less than what you need/deserve... my guess is even if you live closer together he still would go out w/ "girl friends"... even if you were engaged and/or married...! =(... he does it now, he'll do it later...
2007-11-21 08:09:29 · answer #5 · answered by elvlayarvvi fEisty wife and mom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you're not exclusive...and until you are he has the right to hang out with whomever he wants. AT LEAST he was honest, would you rather him of lied and starting being sneaky? I would keep your options open as well until you two become exclusive. This is what dating is all about...if you can't handle him going out with others I would suggest a break now.
2007-11-21 08:32:47 · answer #6 · answered by laura1977 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He doesn't want to commit in case he finds something he likes better. He is still looking, plain and simple. He doesn't want to feel guilty about seeing someone else.
2007-11-21 08:15:32 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you dont own him, he aint a dog, he can go out if he pleases. yous aint even in a relationship yet and you are already saying he cant go out with hes friends, if you carry on like this there will be no relationship at all!!! trust me i have been in the same boat as you.
2007-11-21 08:05:10 · answer #8 · answered by Fader's Girl 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sorry but it sounds like he is not truly committed to you yet, he is on the fence and doesn't know what to do.
2007-11-21 08:30:18 · answer #9 · answered by kitkat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋