Proverbs 31 tells us about the ideal woman, wife and mother. i always told myself before marriage that when i meet that special person and marry him i will be that ideal woman. but since ive been married i really struggled to balance everything.
i shudder to think what will happen if kids is added. one has to work, because you need money, then when you come home prepare food, clean the house, do the washing and dishes ect ect it never stops. at night im just to tired to stay awake and be intimate with my hubby as well...can anyone help me in trying to get the hang of this. ive been married for 2 and a half years and im 23.
2007-11-20 23:51:26 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Life has four parts: Work, Family, House, You.
Work part time.
Hire a cleaning service, designate a couple days out of the week just to clean or do "household maintainance", or have set days to do certain chores. As long as the kitchen sink is clean, the mess *can* wait. Flylady.com is a great resource, check it out.
Go out on dates and do special things with your husband now, because once you have a kid, forget that for a decade without planning for a babysitter!
Get a checkup for mild depression.
Make a list of your dreams and what truly makes you happy. Twice a week GO to the mall, to a movie, etc., etc., etc. Life was meant to be enjoyed!!
Being a Proverbs 31 woman is all about attitude. Read that passage again and again. IMAGINE yourself as that woman. Since we can't grow vineyards and burn oil, etc. nowadays, think of what she WOULD do in today's age. Again, take on her Attitude.
2007-11-21 04:46:53 · answer #1 · answered by emilsignia 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In a household, there is more responsibility to bear than one person can hope to accomplish themselves without burning out. What you do is negotiate the tasks in the house that need to get done. Make a list. Put your name in one column and his in the other. Then list the things that get done under the person that does them. I imagine your list is very long and his is not. Obviously that is not fair. You need to be realistic in your expectations. No one is perfect and no one is ideal. What marriage is is a team, a partnership to meet both of your needs. You are responsible for making your life what it should be. You are responsible for being happy. Your husband is responsible for making his own happiness. As a couple, you negotiate fairly the things that must get done. You talk in advance about who will do what when/if children come on board.
Tell your husband you are exaughsted and overwhelmed. Your family deserves the best of you--not the left-overs. To make change you have to look at the situation. Obviously the way it is now is not working out real well for you. Split up the chores fairly so that you have some time for you, some time to relax and the energy to make love again. Life is short. Live it well. What are your real priorities? Set time limits on this housecleaning. Put yourself on your To Do list. Make yourself, your health and your happiness a priority in your life. If you had kids, could you hire some help? One person cannot rule the world. Be realistic. You are just learning. You have a very good point.
You need time to play. Time for fun. Time to take care of you. No one is going to enjoy a washed out, over tired, ill, depressed wife. Your current plan is not working. Fix it. If you do not fix it, resentment, fatigue, and ill health will follow. Consider counseling if you have trouble with this. You seem perfectionistic, which means you will walk around feeling like a failure all day. You are not responsible for everything. It is time for a change. Negotiate to make your life what it should be--happy.
You must treat yourself better than this. Be kind.
2007-11-21 00:23:31 · answer #2 · answered by whereRyou? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As long as you stay healthy and active, you should be fine. Posture and back strength are vital & key. I am a DDD... and I don't have the shoulder/back pain some people are talking about. I love my chest size, and I have never been ashamed of it. Join a gym... some have machines that can help you strengthen the muscles in your back. Make sure you eat the right kinds of things & the right amounts (I don't mean diet... I mean just eat normal, well-balanced meals) and take care of your body. You'll be fine. I was a 36DD in HS too. I was a 38 DDD by the time I graduated from college. I have had 2 babies & breastfed both of them just fine. The best place I found to buy bras is Lane Bryant. Seriously!!! The clothes may not fit you... but you're not there for the clothes, you're there for the bras! They have pretty, sexy bras in larger sizes, and one of the associates will gladly fit you for your correct size. I used to love Victoria's Secret... but the skinny straps on most of their cutesy bras did a number on my shoulders LOL. If you prefer VS, go for their Second Skin Satin line of bras. They're not as sexy as some of the others, but they will feel good on your shoulders and give your breasts a nice shape/form. But for me personally, I now buy all of my bras from Lane Bryant.
2016-05-24 21:13:21 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont worry! Life will be like that, not only to you, but also to all! You should be mentally prepared for the both advantages and disadvantages of the life.Life is a mixed fruit of sweet and bitter.You need to taste the both.Then only you can have a balanced life.In fact, I too married having two kids happily enjoying with my family.So,its all depend on how you have taken your vision on your life.
2007-11-21 00:02:22 · answer #4 · answered by dilipan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
However you decide to work things out, I commend you for not rushing to have children. You are right. With a child, you will be 10 times more occupied, busy and stressed as you are now.
Plus, one way or another, you will have much greater expenses and less income.
2007-11-21 03:56:29 · answer #5 · answered by Lorenzo Steed 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe ya'll should make a schedule to balance what should be done that day & rest up the next day. get him to help 2. maybe ya'll can rotate. And if you want to spark up the marriage a little trying something new :)
2007-11-21 00:02:03 · answer #6 · answered by creshia 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your husband to help you out. He's in this marriage too.
2007-11-21 00:20:21 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Life is hard, and time consuming.
Spend less time on the computer, and stop reading the bible.
You'll cope better then.
2007-11-20 23:56:33 · answer #8 · answered by MikeD2 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋
some women work part time,, the wordl was simpler then,, i know its rough nowadays.
2007-11-21 00:00:32 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop thinking your wonder women and you can do it ALL.
2007-11-21 00:26:46 · answer #10 · answered by cooter726 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋