The baby's dad dumped me the very MOMENT i told him i was pregnant, he also demanded an abortion. i didnt get an abortion so i went through the pregnancy alone , supporting myself, i called him from the hopstail, he didnt come to see the baby. i even took the baby over there he wouldn't even look @ her. I am pursuing child support, and now he is requesting a paternity test. its absolutely ridiculous becuase he already admitted he knmows hes the father, it was never in disupste, he knows i dont sleep around. Anyways, im worried he is not a good guy to have around the baby. he is 30 years old, has mentla problems and is obsessed with mary kate and ashely and hialry duff movies. his dad is also very strange. I could use the child support money becuase im broke and single BUT i dont know that its worth it to RISK him filing for custody or visits, and my daugheter might have to spend time alone with him - it scares me. shuld i just go on our way and not go for child support?
2007-11-20 19:20:07 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Custody/visitation issues are separate issues from child support. Whether he chooses to pursue the first, he must pay the second. Its is not for your benefits, but your daughter's - go for the support.
2007-11-20 19:25:32 · answer #1 · answered by Barb Outhere 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's acting like this now toward his baby, I highly doubt he will seek any time of shared custody. Go with filing for child support. As for DNA test, f'ck it, if you have to do it to get your money your baby deserves, DO IT! If by chance the guy tries to get some kind of custody, you can voice your concerns with his personality and also his mental illness. However, keep in mind that if he wants to have visitation with his daughter, the judge will encourage it. They can however do an investigation on him since you have these "concerns". I am going through a divorce and my son is 9 years old. His father is a piece of sh*t who does credit card fraud for a living, didn't care for our son on the weeks it was his turn to have him and didn't live where he claimed to live. He even had a warrant the day we went to court for this. I tried telling the court this but they were so stuck on keeping the father in the picture. Well, less than 1 month into our 50/50 shared custody. My husband spilled his guts that he has no place to live, is having $$$ problems and other issues that aren't allowing him to care for our son. The son that he fought so hard to get SOLE custody of. As of last Friday he's been in jail..lol
The moral of my story is that if he files for some kind of custody...let him. Give him enough rope to hang himself. It doesn't sound to me like he has what it takes to be a parent and unfortunately the court will have to see that for themselves before just taking your word for it.
**Even if you're financially strapped and need a lawyer, there are places that will provide that. It's called legal aid. Ask the courthouse for more info.
2007-11-21 03:49:23 · answer #2 · answered by grneyedgrly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, you file and he requests a parternity test, which is his right. Test proves that he is the father. Not only are you do child support from the date that you filed, but he now has to pay for the paternity test as well. Failure to pay can lead to suspension of a drivers license, suspension/revocation of professional licenses/certifications, seizure of any and all income tax refunds, credit issues, fines and jail time.
Next, paying child support does not automatically guarantee him visits with the child, especially in light of his behavior. Let him take you to court for visitation. Good Luck.
2007-11-21 03:56:05 · answer #3 · answered by MHnurseC 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I never knew my dad due to my mom thinking the same and i was mad at her for not letting me see him. Im 22 and never saw him. I know how it is so dont do that to your child. BUT when you go for child support/ custody hearings, you HAVE to have a paternity test. And make sure you tell the persons who are handling your case that he is mentally unstable and your scared to leave her alone with him and his father and the child will most probably have to have someone in your family besides you to go with him when he's with the child!!!!
2007-11-21 03:26:17 · answer #4 · answered by short_n_sweet70301 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is probably requesting a paternity test to discourage you from pursuing this. I would still go through with it. Even if you don't and he wants to see that baby he can request one. He already has proven that he wants nothing to do with the baby. Do you really think that he will take the time and the money to take you to court for visitation? I would go through with it.
2007-11-21 03:25:55 · answer #5 · answered by kim h 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you serious? You tried to push the baby onto him, even as far as taking it to him even though YOU KNEW he didn't want anything to do with it... and now you say he is mentally unstable? Although i believe he should paying child support, i also believe you aren't the full quid yourself!!!
2007-11-21 03:48:52 · answer #6 · answered by Shazela 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
use your motherly instincts and always do whats best for the baby..
2007-11-21 03:24:45 · answer #7 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋