What would you do i have been married for 10 yrs now and have not made love to her in 3 months now?

Question

i have tried but she keeps shooting me down she says stuff like her back hurts or she does not feel good i have tried to make a move on her every night and nothing happens i don't know what else to do i have talked to her about it

it make me feel like she don't love me no more it has all most been 4 months but i still say 3 months untill that 4 month date

and no i have not did any thing to make her made or even had a fight the last fight we had was around 8 yrs ago

we are both together 24/7 so i know she is not cheating on me

the kids go to sleep any where from 10 to 12 dep. on what day it is

Answer 1

Hun, you just answered your question yourself! If you are around each other 24/7, that is enough to drive anybody crazy! Another thing, you need to start wooing her long before you hit the bedroom. We women are turned on by different things than men are. Try helping her out around the house or take care of the kids and let her have a day out for herself and her girlfriends. Have you tried snuggling up to her and talking to her about things and don't mention sex! She may also be going through some kind of hormonal change. Has she started any new meds lately? There are so many things. It could be mental, physical or just plain worn out tired! Don't nag her for sex, it will only make her feel guilty and this will only add to the problems! If all else fails, seek a docs advice and if all is OK there, then go to a counselor. Good Luck!!

Answer 2

I wonder if you have become a slacker. Shower up, brush your teeth, put on some deoderant and take her out somewhere without the kids. Set the mood.
She needs some romance, candles. moonlite, a warm body rub and to feel desire. Maybe you should try some new "moves" Since when does sex have to be at bedtime every nite. How about after the kids head off to school.
Take a shower with her and wash every inch of her body. Comb her hair. Masturbate in front of her. Whisper to her how much you desire her and tell her what she does to you.
Set her soul on fire and you will get some action. She sounds like she is tired of the same ole hum drum. If your together 24/7,,,, thats just too much togetherness. You need time apart sometimes maybe she could go to a spa or with some girls to a nearby shopping expedition. If you lived in Illinois I would say to Chicago to see the Christmas light.
Sex is so much more than you sound like you are putting into it. Work it baby!!!!!

Answer 3

There could be many reasons for this.

It could even be physical .. depends on her age .. and health. It can even be mental. It could have something to do with her hormones .. or going through the change.

Lots of men think that their wives do not love them when this happens .. but it's usually not true ... it's just that it is different for women .. than it is for men.

One thing .. back-off from trying daily. Give her a breather of having to come up with excuses. Most women consider this as being bugged .. or harrassed about sex .. and they become to dread it .. and to dread having to avoid it .. it becomes an awful feeling ... especially when the lady has absolutely ZERO desire.

In the mean-time ... check yourself over. Have you made yourself desirable for her? Remember - that a lot of women's desire ,, is emotional .. and many women take how a man treats them out-of-bed .. to-bed with them. It's true. Women like romance .. and to be wooed. You could not do a little bit of wooing and expect her to just immediately have relations with her ... you need to take your time .. be considerate & personal. Do you try to "make love" to her .. or try to just have sex ?? .. .there is a difference .. a big difference with a woman.

There IS a reason for this. However - discovering it may be difficult. It sounds like she just is not turned-on .. which also happens when couples have been married for a long time.

Know this .. most women get turned OFF .. when a man gets mad because of no sex ... and when the husband makes the woman feel like the sex is a duty they HAVE to do ... this is when the husband loses a lover .. and in return, has a woman who starts looking & feeling about sex differently .. in not such a good way.

Think about it. Woo her like you did when you dated her. Make special time for her ... but don't pressure her .. if you happen to turn her on again .. you will know it .. she will probably let you know.

Rekindle that old flame. Just no pressure. Make it sweet.

Answer 4

I would cook her dinner, candlelight, the whole deal. Flowers maybe. Romance.

Then at the end of the dinner date, look at her seductively and say "I want to take the love of my life to bed with me"

And see what happens.

If she averts her eyes, say, "What do you think? Let's go" -- and if she's not in the mood then that opens the door for a tender talk about the subject. Something like "What's going on honey? I really care and want to know how you're feeling."

And then sit in silence. And listen.

Answer 5

Perhaps she's feeling something and not telling you the truth.it could be
"hormonal changes"...(as we aged we have this type of problems)...or if not and if she's not cheating,...'how about you?"you could have done something bad behind her back,and that she had found out about it....that is why she's trying to avoid you....I don't think you're wife won't let you make love to her without any "reason".there's got to be something...try to find out more for yourself,keep talking to her and ask her about it,and make sure she confess.You have the right to know....

Answer 6

Well, what did she say when you talked to her about it??

ADDED: Why are you together 24/7. That can be pretty oppressive no matter how much you love each other!!

Answer 7

because you want to do it the same room,same place always!!! why not spend a liitle this time.Make love in other place like beach,motel.hotel or maybe in your car for a change.You have to spice up a little.Be creative for once.Give her a chance to be alone too, tell her to go out with friends,spend time in a parlor and if she feels sexy then shes ready for the big night.Goodluck.

Answer 8

Be careful. From my experience, my husband refused to make love to me for moth. He laways said he was depressed, not feeling well. He even said he is taking medicine that are affecting his sexuality. Guess what, there was absolutely nothing wrong with him, he was rather having an affair.

Answer 9

How old is she? Maybe she's just going through that "no sex slump"..I say try romancing her and showing her how much you love her. Try a back massage and don't try to get sex then..just let her know you love her and she'll come around..

Answer 10

I am a little depressed but definitely unappreciated, that makes my stomach turn when my husband tries to touch me.