How do i get my husband to pay more attention to me?

Question

I know my husband loves me but he never helps me around the house. i work a full time job, take care of the kids, cook, clean, and take good care of my appearance. But he's always to tired to pay attention to me. He's always asleep on the couch. what am i doing wrong?

Answer 1

Wow, you work and do the house chores...sound like a good woman. You better take your hubby to the doctor. Cuz...he should be all over you at bedtime. Maybe he just doesnt see the jem he has at home. Let loose and let the house clutter a little bit..get a rise out of him..probably be a start to something...at least get his heart pumping...geeesh!

Answer 2

what exactly do you want him to do? Maybe he is clueless and brought up to think women do the housework. Since you both work, do you have enough money to get some weekly household help or a sitter for one night?

Be more specific to hubby about exactly what you want him to do and when. I know that to some men, when they first get home, they want to relax.

I think this is a case that your hubby is unintentionally taking you for granted and doesn't realize what you do.

Let him see...when he comes home, tell him you will be out all evening so he needs to care for kids, cook, and clean. When you get back ask him how it went. Then tell him this is what you do 365 days while he comes home from work and sleeps on the couch thank you very much!

Tell him every other day you guys will take turns who cares for kids or cooks or cleans after work. Or some arrangement you like.

Now is this just about him helping you with house or being intimate with you too? If the latter, then try to hire a sitter on weekend and go out with him somewhere romantic. You might need some wine and to instigate a bit. It could become a nice ritual. Once a month or so, sleep hotel getaway and do the nasty. See if one of your moms will watch kids at their place, then you can have house to yourself

Answer 3

You are doing nothing wrong darling. You sound like the perfect wife, its a shame your hubby doesn't realise this. Maybe you could both start exercising together walking/jogging/biking etc so that you get to spend more quality time together. (and he gets to see you in your sexy exercise gear!)
Talk to him and TELL him how you feel, if you need a break around the home start having day trips with the girls every now and again so that he has to get off his lazy butt and do something around the home.

I hope everything turns out O.K. for you, but if he doesn't want to act like a real man and start helping around the home then his *** may have to be 'kicked to the curb'!

Answer 4

Honey, the only thing you are doing wrong is staying with him. Too many women settle for less than what they deserve. I use to be one. It affects your self-esteem as well as the way your children will percieve relationships. You dont want them seeing that. It could possibly affect their future relationships. It will be very hard but well worth it in the long run. You can't move on to the next and better places in your life if you let this continue. Do what's best for everyone in the situation. Leave. That is, if he doesn't get his act right. I highly respect the fact that you recognize this as an issue. You aren't denying a serious problem like most people do when the problem is their own. You obviously want to do something about it which signifies that you're off to a great start :)

Good luck :)

Answer 5

you're not doing anything wrong, does he work long hours? Some men just think its the womens responsibility to do all the household chores and tend to the kids. Talk to him, bring it up nicely ask him to do simple things like load the dishwasher while you bathe the kids, or can you vaccuum while I change the sheets on the beds, some men need to be told what needs to be done. He might come home and assume there is nothing to do, so he sleeps.

Answer 6

Get to the couch first each night and start acting like him. You're NOT doing anything wrong your husband sounds like mine, and about a dozen of my friends. Your doing all the work and he isn't pulling his weight around the house. And if you tell him he thinks your nagging him.
I wish i knew the answer but I don't. May be someone will one of these days!

Answer 7

Find out what his day off is, than schedule a date with him, make sure he's had a nap if he need to. get a baby sitter for kids. Get him away from the house, from work, from kids. Get dressed up you deserve it, and go out with him. You plan the first one. He plans the second one. (make him follow thought on it). He may be tired by take the excess out of it. If that dose not work go to concealing.

Answer 8

First you need to have a heartfelt sit down talk with your husband and express your feelings on how you feel.

Tell him that you need to be appreciated and loved.

Ask him why he does not want to be close to you.

Make time for you both. Get away for a love fest weekend.

You both need to rekindle the spark that got you both together in the first place.

You both need passion ! Go to Victoria's Secret and buy a knockout outfit that will " rock his world " when he lays eyes on
your beautiful body.

Try a nice night out. A candle lit dinner and some good wine will do wonders.

Best Wishes,

The Woodster

Answer 9

actually what you do is supposed to be enough. but it seems a routine now, so he doesn't consider it as something to be given reward to. why don't you try to tell him that one Sunday afternoon you need sometime off to go to saloon to give him a surprise make over, and HE GETS TO TAKE CARE OF THE HOUSE AND KIDS for the day. that'll teach him.

Answer 10

You're not doing anything wrong. If he is tired all the time he might be sick, depressed or tired from working all day - which yeah you work and take care of the kids and house but apparently you can handle your life and workload better than he can...