Women: In what situation/circumstances do you feel most threatened by a male stranger?

Question

By stranger I mean some one you don't know.
Might it be walking home alone at night? Or perhaps when one stares at you in line at the grocery store?
In answering please also explain why you feel threatened.
Is it because of experience? Is it because of another's experience? Is it because of a story/article you read?

Answer 1

Good question.

1- If I'm walking alone in the dark. I can easily be overpowered and I don't know what a stranger is capable of. I have never been attacked, so it's not based on past experiences, just common sense.

2- Anyone with a gun, because I'm not stupid.

Other than that, I'm always watching and prepared, but not really fearful of too many situations.

EDIT:

Just to add what Ms Sophi said, believe it or not, I'm sometimes more fearful of people that I know regarding my personal space...if I get a bad "vibe" I become very guarded, defensive or just shut down, more than I would with a stranger at a grocery store. I don't know where it comes from.

EDIT II:

Ms Sophi: Yes. Although I understand my reaction to certain types of people that trigger the "red flag"...I still haven't figured out where some other reactions come from. I'm very open but very protective of my mental, emotional and physical space. I freak out over the smallest things that violate that space sometimes :(

Answer 2

Fear instilled by movies makes me afraid if a man I don't know gets on the elevator with me, the doors close and there is no one else but him and me....I get nervous inside thinking about movies when this happens then the next scene is the elevator doors opening again, the man and woman are both gone, the only things left are the strewn out contents of the lady's purse and one high heel shoe from when he dragged her off to her death.... More substantiated fears when a strange man makes dirty gestures at me while driving or in the grocery store, I don't mean just giving the bird, other women know what I mean. Think of things like having your index and second finger up together, but far enough apart to be flicking their disgusting tongue in between the fingers, gestures like that....then you notice that a car is still following you and you start going to more populated streets, not driving directly home for fear that whoever will be following you and see where you live, come back later for you after the lights are out and everyone is asleep. This fear comes from a real story that still scares me today happened almost 15yrs ago in my hometown. A lady went grocery shopping, two men followed her home, took her in her front yard, with her husband right inside waiting for her to come home. They found her groceries in the yard, and her body 2days later. So, when a woman is alone in public, day or night, you can bet that these things are in the back of our heads all the time, even if you've never been attacked for real, smart women know that it could happen to them at any time.

Answer 3

When he's in my "bubble" uninvited. Unless on the bus/plan/train/elevator or any other cramped place I don't like people with in a couple feet unless invited.

Example: Standing outside the club (smoking (don't smoke but it's a good place to find my friends), waiting for a ride, making a call...) and he approaches me and touched me or gets with in a foot for no reason or uninvited. So he comes up and puts an arm around my shoulders. The reason that bothers me is because it's someone I don't know that is close enough to hurt me and I have no room to retaliate.

When it's okay is the same scene and I wave him on to come closer to talk over the music or whisper. If it's invited then I can stand in a way to escape if needed.

I guess it's more about being trapped. I want to be in a place where I am not trapped.

Answer 4

A persistent male stranger. If one guy cat calls then walks after me begging for a phone number, it does not bother me. It gets a little scary when he goes " I don't care if you are married, come on baby give up those digits.." and I reply" Sorry, I am happily married and I don't cheat" ...then I get a " Hey don't be that way, come on give me your number.." On and on until they follow you to your car, try to get in...etc...

Scenarios like that scare the crap out of me. I have even had to deal with it with my children in tow, ( which is really scary since you don't know how persist ant this guy is going to be, or how violent he can become.)

Answer 5

I feel most threatened in a parking lot at night...trying to get to my car. Why? Because I realize that random acts of violence do occur, and frequently in those locations.

I try very hard not to put myself in potentially dangerous situations, and consequently, have never been mugged or violated. I do know ladies who have, and do my best to learn from their mistakes and take greater precautions. I do not, and refuse, to live in fear. But I am realistic, and know that the more precautions I take, the less the likelihood of being attacked.

Answer 6

when we feel a stranger walking behind us while walking home at night or really scary situations like in a room with no one except a stranger, if they do something, women feel threatened because their afraid of rapists.

Answer 7

I am a rape survivor. As a result, I maintain a very large personal space. Whenever someone gets too close to me, I become very uneasy. One of the ways for me to deal with discomfort is to 'freeze' a person out of my immediate surroundings. Most people know not to crowd me. I also have many male friends and a husband to watch out for me, just in case.

Edit: to the Lioness's comment: I know exactly how you feel. Did you suffer from the hands of the people you trusted the most? At the naive ( in my case ) age of twenty I married a rapist. He also was my very first sexual partner. So, after the nightmare of a marriage ( whole 10 days of it ), my outlook on relationships, sexuality and trust had to be seriously rearranged with self education, medical help and personal growth... I managed to survive and flourish with help of people who love and protect me. However, old habits die hard...

Answer 8

It is better being cautious of anything potentially unsecured rather than being naive and thoughtless. So, I'd say I watch out any stranger constantly under any circumstances.

Answer 9

I got my carry permit because everybody knows everybody in my community. They know I live alone and might think I was an easy target. My home is "wired' and I'm protected.
I had a couple of uneasy situations of people trying to get me to open my door at night and one night a guy following me home.

Answer 10

When he is the only other person around. It is because of past experiences, and also because I am a dispatcher for the local police department. You can never be too careful.