What's up with this?!?

Question

What is wrong with all you people out there that cheat and then post questions like "Should I end the affair or stay with my boyfriend/girlfriend?" Or "I'm in love with the person I'm having an affair with. Should I tell my spouse?" Has society become that degenerated that nobody stays faithful anymore?! What the hell is wrong with people?!

Great answers folks! Keep em coming!

For Todd...I'm not judging people. I just don't get why cheaters need the validation...but thanks for the great answer!

Great answer KJ....didn't realize the statistics were that high.

Answer 1

I actually looked up the statistics on this matter.
i found some disturbing numbers... (yes, work is painfully slow and i need to kill time)
it's one full page of stats.. but one line i found was this:
at least one partner will have an affair in approximately 80 percent of all marriages. With this many marriages affected, it's unreasonable to think affairs are due only to the failures and shortcomings of individual husbands or wives."

the web site goes on to say that people who hang around on the internet is likely to cheat even more. so most of us, if not all of us here probably has cheated one time or another or cheated on. hanging around here at the answers, you know it's true.

i think only way to find out how damaging cheating can be is for one to actually commit the crime or happen against them. I stand here and say that i would never cheat. well, today anyways. but who am i crappin? i'm 80% likely that i'm going to end up doing the wild thing with someone other than my wifie. what is going to prevent me from cheating is the love for my wife and the love i feel from wifie.. but what if that stops? what if the stare of love becomes stare of resentment?

feeling wanted, loved and being attended to, it's our basic infant needs that never goes away till the day we die. when not received from home, and when that hottie office co worker gives it to you, i see how the belt can come undone, her nylons lowered and skirt lifted and things can happen right on that office desk. it's happened to me on my first marriage, i know.

people are generally good. but the morals give away to our basic needs. think about it this way: you lost your job... you're hungry, your kids are hungry, and you're at the grocery store buying mac and cheese.. the guy in front of you at the cashier drops a 100$ bill.. he doesn't notice it.. no one notices it. you can pick it up and give it back or use it to buy steaks for your hungry family. what do you do?

basic needs.

let's not judge and curse out people for fulfilling their basic needs.

but still, it doesn't make it right.

Answer 2

These people are looking for either validation for their infidelity or relief from their guilt. Anonymity comes with the benefit of admitting the crime without putting the face to it. However, there are probably some people out there who genuinely need advice.

I avoid commenting on those topics, usually. Cheaters don’t seem to wake up from a reality check. Nonetheless, how can you instantly blame people for their lack of self-control though, particularly in a society conditioned towards selfishness, high stress, and ludicrous restraint? A loyal couple seems nearly miraculous in our time.

Look, not that I condone extramarital affairs (except under consensual circumstances, like swinging), but I can empathize with people struggling for control…and rebuke idiots who just want to feel justified for faithlessness.

Answer 3

I think it is selfishness..and society.. Nobody stays together anymore and people sleep around like there is no STD's or anything like that out there.. I wish that to-days society had the same values that our Grandparents and Great Grandparents had and most still have. People just don't think...

Answer 4

I think most people don't take marriage seriously. They date then at some point decide hey why not get married. Instead of really thinking it through and grow up before they marry. Also divorce is like an American standard now a days.

Answer 5

People are living in the flesh with no real thought of consequences, emotional , spiritual or physical.
If people don't have some kind of moral beliefs then they will do as they please satisfying whatever desires they have.
The Internet has its dark corners where people feel faceless and do things that they would not do otherwise.

Answer 6

its a throw away world now if its broke trash it and get a new one and the morals of people have degraded to that point also i have gotten to the point not to respond to those types of comments because they only want to hear what it is they want to do not what they should do which is not friggin cheat in the first place

Answer 7

I feel the same way. I mean if you don't truely love someone or you don't think you can remain faithful, then simply don't marry them! common sense. Marriage needs to be taken more seriously.

Answer 8

throw away society... and people don't know how to treat people these days... they seek their own selfish desires... people have no idea what faithfulness means because you see smut on tv and the internet... they think if hollywood can cheat, so can they... they think if the president can cheat, so can they... partly due to bad examples... =(...

Answer 9

sweetheart ...i read you .
but love can neither be created nor destroyed.
Even if ppl think ITS LOVE they are in ..and its totally lust .. it takes a wise amount of time to insert this theory in your head ..and another wiser amount of time to move on.
Ppl are blinded .. they take it as a substitute ...if their bf/gf fail to give time "only" cos they busy at work .. their beloved/lover get astray looking for affection /attention ... it happens all the time .. and very rare its true love ... the astrayed one.

ppl want to tell? their spouse..etc? cos of GUILT!!!

Answer 10

Maybe they would all feel differently if the shoe were on the other foot and they were the victim. I agree with what you say, and have often wondered that same thing.