What's going wrong with today's relationships?

Question

Congratulations to Her Majesty for 60 years marriage. My parents are 50 years married in May next year. Divorce is 'too simple' now... the younger generations seem to treat marriage with distain. They tie-the-knot , then seperate very soon after. The commitment just isn't there for whatever reasons.

Answer 1

Risk avoidance is a risky business! When we try too hard to keep trouble at bay, we effectively create trouble for ourselves. Even if we could create a sanitised world without danger of any kind, we would not enjoy living in it. We would soon become depressed and disillusioned. We need the adrenaline rush that only a true challenge can provide. With this in mind, let's look again at the wisdom (or otherwise) of your current strategy. Are you doing what's sensible or what's sincere?

have a good day
~<~<~<~<~<~<

Answer 2

I think the relationships are the same as they always have been to be honest, but our opinions on divorce has changed. It's spoken about more now, and has become an option for everybody, years ago it simply wasn't an option for most of the working class, people just didn't have the money or strength of mind to go through with it.

I dont believe that everyone that got married 50+ years ago lived happily together, some did, some people are made for each other like your parents, but i also think a lot of couples stayed together in them days because they had no other choice. Women would not have coped financially bringing up children without any benefits, men were scared of losing their children, so married couples stayed together and put their feelings aside, they both had a mutual unspoken understanding that they couldnt cope on their own

It's very different these days, we're more inclined to speak up and let our opinions be known now in the modern world, rather than the "cheer up, settle with what you've got and get on with it" attitude we used to have. Everyone is more independant than they ever have been before, divorce appears to be more easy, even though it isnt. Men have visitation rights of their children, women are not thought badly of for divorce and are able to cope financially on their own. I think this is why it has become rare to a mariage last so long these days

Answer 3

"we have been together for five years and we have a good time together so why not get married?"

this seems to be the attitude for most couples nowadays.. i honestly believe this is why there are so many divorces.
thankfully there are the fortunate few who do truly love each other and are not confusing love with lust. these are the ones with the actual chance of making their marriae work, these are the people who know that the cost of their gown or reception is not relevant.. the feelings matter.. if you are too selfish in a casual relationship there is NO way you should ever reconsider getting married.. i just wish people would grow up before they put their name down on that peice of paper that means so much!

Answer 4

fckuing totally agree. media is a big problem, this i think is the main reason why people do not stay in marriages long. kids and people alike see actors/tresses getting remarried again and again and people see this as the norm.

the internet/phone etc take away that special excitment (like how you aint spoken to someone in a long time, and when you see them, you heart goes wild). constant communication at a begginning of a relationship is a no no.

people are also have head so big that they stick it up their ar$es. they think they are too good for anyone, and this mentallity is why most are single, they automatically classify some who isnt as good lookin as inferior. hence they eliminating their perfect match.

having a divorce is too easy.... many older parents (pre 90's) argue like their about to start world war 3, but their still 2gether. now days, one argument and its all over.

society is falling apart.

Answer 5

Todays relationships, not just marriage, relationships as a whole, be it family, friends or working colleagues. I perceive the problem stems from people's attitude. IE. folks today seem to take take take and foget that in order to receive, one should feel able to give willingly and unselfishly. That's gone. Also folks don't really stop and think of 'Cause and effect' IE, if I do this, how will that effect the people around me. Actually, it goes alot deeper than this and I could go on for ages and bore the pants of you. Sorry for rambling.

Answer 6

Speaking as someone who is VERY recently seperated (month and a half) I do think people expect it to be too easy, my marriage lasted 6 and a half years and why, because I made all the sacrifice I tried I did all the work, too many people including my soon to be ex just think marriage happens, it doens't it has to be worked at, but in my case I couldn't keep being the only one who did the graft.

Answer 7

People are just rushing into relationships....
They have the mentality that "there are more fish in the sea".
They treat marriage like a game. If you don't like being with one person, you can always get another. I think Hollywood plays a huge part in this particular way of thinking! I mean, just look at some of these actors/actresses/singers.....
Get to know the person VERY well before you "jump in"!

Answer 8

I totally agree with the older generation's view on commitment. When I decided to get married, just over a year ago, I was commited. Not only did I pay all the bills, while he hoarded his paycheck, but also cleaned, cooked, washed, ironed, and pampered my husband. When he had medical problems involving itimacy, I begged him to see a Dr. He was too proud. He walked out on me, a few days ago, to return to his mother's home. Next time I feel like a dependent, I will adopt a child.

Answer 9

I don't think people are as committed to battle through difficulties now. You just have to read some of these Askers! We're trained more now to think of ourselves as individuals rather than as a team which must work together and overcome real problems. We're lazy, selfish, we have unrealistic expectations... It's not just young generations either. Lots of people divorcing later in life (I mean post 50s.) Easy to blame young people for all society's worst elements.

Answer 10

Yes divorce is way to easy for people that is why people like Britney Spears take it so lightly. They know they can be divorced or annulled in a matter of days or months for us normal people. I believe it is because today's generations feel no obligation to anything or anyone including but not limited to God which to me is complete arrogance in itself. If they had God in there life they would feel differently about everything I think.......