I understand it's not always possible but if you are in the same city... is it not a good idea to stay together
2007-11-19 22:27:40 · 11 answers · asked by Gulab 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Ok.. here’s my side of the argument:
1. If Western means US then may be yes. But many families in Europe still do that and value that.
2. Staying with parents does not mean staying in the same room. It may also mean staying on separate floors in the same big house.
3. All the apes and primates stick to their herd. And stay as one big family.
4. They sacrificed their own freedom to take care of the kids. When it’s pay back time, the kids begin to choose our individuality over our duty.
5. In a movie on the same issue, a father laments in the end: “One father gives his all to take care of 4 kids, but when his hour of need comes, these four kids together do not come forward to take care of that one father”
2007-11-19 22:56:08 · update #1
I would have my parents to come and live with me if they needed to (they work right now so don't need financial help like that) I do think it is the children's responsibility to care for ageing parents.
2007-11-20 00:17:49 · answer #1 · answered by sparkleythings_4you 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As much as that may be financially wise, I disagree with it for so many other reasons.
1) The wife will probably feel more comfortable if she feels her husband can provide and care for her. (generally)
2) You don't want your parents interfering with the more personal parts of your marriage, especially in the early stages.
3) Who sets the rules? If it's your parents, are you comfortable living strictly within those rules or being reprimanded when they are broken?
4) Do you really want to ask your parent's permission to have friends over when they all have their own homes?
2007-11-20 06:36:28 · answer #2 · answered by yarr! 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If it is necessary, OK. However, it would not be my first choice, it can place a huge strain on a new marriage. Living together and this is the only alternative, perhaps consider not getting married until you are able to have a place to reside in alone. For many cultures this is excepted and expected. These things should be discussed prior to the marriage. God bless****
2007-11-20 06:33:33 · answer #3 · answered by ? 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
areal man wouldnr even consider it.When u get married u should already have a place for her to move into that doesnt require ur parents aproval.Not to mention thats its just flat wrong if u have to live at oyur parents then oyur still not reposable enogh to commit to it.I mena really how many people do that.To me its just flat wrong when my wife and i got married i had a place we could call our own so if she decide say to sleep naked she didnt have to worry about getting dressed when she had to use the bathroom,or if she woke in the middle of the night she could just wander around the house and not have to be quiet if she didnt want to. If u want to stay at oyur parents then stay single forever no self respecting lady wants to live with your mom and dad
2007-11-20 06:43:29 · answer #4 · answered by wolfettes lee 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i wouldn't do it unless it were an emergency situation. living with the husbands parents, the new wife can't live up to her mil standards. with the wifes family, the husband can't live up to the fathers standards. the idea is to start a new life together. i wouldn't want anything interfering with that. and for the record, just b/c we don't live with our families, doesn't mean we don't support our families in time of need or leave them totally.
2007-11-20 07:18:32 · answer #5 · answered by racer 51 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ummmm NO
no no no no no
i cant imagine living with my parents with my husband
and i would rather live on the subway then live with his parents who i love very much
it just is NOT a good idea
edited to add
you suggested that the parents might need help because they are old and sick? that is different....i would of course take in my HOME my parents or my inlaws but i would never live in their homes
and really?! "primates" i dont try to emulate what monkeys do.....i dont want no one eating my lice for example
2007-11-20 06:32:01 · answer #6 · answered by darcymc 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Generally no in the West. However it is a question you need to ask in a more cultural similar area to your own.
2007-11-20 06:31:05 · answer #7 · answered by Bob D 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It would place an unfair burden on the parents. If you are old enough to be married, you are old enough to be on your own. Bad choice to stay with parents if it can be avoided. You all need privacy.
2007-11-20 06:46:08 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hell no. If I'm old enough to get married, I'm old enough to fly the coop and if apes want to keep their young with them, more power to them. I'm not the one that has to worry about feeding them for years to come.
2007-11-20 08:17:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
do you mean living with them with your spouse? hell no. there might be certain financial strains, but other than that, there is NO excuse for living with your parents. you are grown enough to marry, you are grown enough to get your own damn place.
2007-11-20 06:33:04 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋