I've been dating my boyfriend for 5 months..
he's 23 and I'm 20
We recently started to make love
but last saturday night he wanted me to talk bad during sex.
I didnt know what to say so I asked him to start..
he said really loud right off the bat..
"'IM GONNA RIP YOU IN HALF BIT'CH"
"YOU LIKE THAT..YOU DIRTY GIRL"
He said he was going to rip me half..I jumped up and turned the lights on and ran to the bathroom , put my clothes on and went back home.
That is some scary stuff.
Why would someone who says he loves you want to split me half?
weird and scary
I havent talked to him since.
He's been calling every hour.
this man needs help.
2007-11-19 14:43:36 · 65 answers · asked by stefaniekents 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
no thats what dirty talk is. talk to him.. he loves you, he was just dirty talking! he doesnt mean it literally.
2007-11-19 14:46:51 · answer #1 · answered by Chasity B 2 · 10⤊ 2⤋
If there are not other creepy signs that he is a sociopath - like verbal abuse or strange behavior toward you I would think his comments were "dirty talk." He may be commenting on his "size" and that he is SO BIG (not abnormal for guys to say that when it is hot and heavy) he will "rip you in half" - meaning bust through you...not "rip you in half with a knife" kinda comment. Thats what is seems to me and I have dealt with some serious sociopaths!!! But watch for other signs or if you have had a weird feeling BEFORE now....it may be a red flag for you. Keep you eyes and ears open or ask him about it. I know it sounds strange, but he is really probably thinking it was playful talk and him calling every hour does NOT have to be stalker behavior - but wondering "what happened?" Maybe he is genuinely worried about how things played out and is wanting to talk. Give him a chance to explain. At 20, this can be scary....but pretty normal. Don't be quick to seal his fate. If you care about him at least hear him out.
2007-11-19 15:21:57 · answer #2 · answered by Green Eyed Girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that he was implying that he was going f*ck you so hard that you'd like a log on his penis, that is in a figurative sense. Still, rip isn't the word I'd use.
Plus I think he should have eased you into it with something like "You like that, you little sl*t?".
Maybe you're not ready for dirty talk in the sack. It can be fun, but not everyone is into it. I think he was just trying to bump up the level of excitement.
What I find disturbing is him calling you every hour. Talk to him and get it over with. Tell him you aren't comfortable with talking dirty. At least not yet. Maybe you can work your way into it. Unless there are other signs of an abusive relationship ( he isolates you from your friends, he insults you one minute and is all lovey the next) I wouldn't worry - he's probably kinky, not abusive.
Love isn't always gentle. Rent the movie "Secretary" if you want a cinematic example.
2007-11-19 14:50:54 · answer #3 · answered by damnyankeega 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hey!! some people like dirty talking and that is just what it is, just a little like role playing. I am sure you think of things while you making love well it is just like that but out loud everyone likes it differently. I think you should at least let him explain, he obviously trusted you enough to ask you to do it now after 5 mths it must be a fantasy that he has had. It would have been more freaky if it was the 1st or 2nd time of love making but not after 5 mths then I would also be freaking out. Call him be open minded though, Good luck!!
2007-11-19 14:54:27 · answer #4 · answered by Cindy B 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It relies upon, while sound is stressful you? nicely that have been given to be noise. yet once you hear some large songs or melodies, sound helps you. yet i think of at times i'm stressful the sound. while i won't be in a position to administration what i'm asserting, Now it relatively is disturbance. yet sound could relatively be an excellent element. It helps me ease my tension.
2016-12-16 13:50:55 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK, you NEED to talk to him. At least be woman enough to tell him how you feel. Maybe he just didn't know what to say and he heard that on a porn or something once and thought it would be different, or that you would laugh, or get turned on.
Seriously, I understand, I would be freaked out too, but you need to talk to him. I doubt he really wants to rip you in half. I think he really loves you, he was expressing his feelings in a "different" way. Give the guy a chance.......
Think about it. People say weird things during sex TRUST ME! Why do people tare off each others clothes, is it because they want to wreck them? No, because they just are excited. If you have any heart at all at least let him explain. If you have any feelings left for him, give him another chance, doesn't he deserve it?
good luck..
If he like punched you in the face during sex, then i would RUN.. but this is nothing to be worried about..
2007-11-19 14:55:33 · answer #6 · answered by angelalee76 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
To the people that are saying this man is psycho and sick : PLEASE, give me a break. It's called dirty talk for a reason. People get carried away with dirty talk. It doesn't mean he actually wants to do it. Look up the research about what a woman's #1 fantasty. It is RAPE! Yep, it surprised me too but it has consistently been a top fantasy for women year after year. It doesn't mean they want to really get raped..they are just having that fantasy ( and as gross as I think it is I am not going to judge).
It does however, sound like you and your man are not sexually compatible and are into two different things...and that could be a problem.
2007-11-19 15:09:38 · answer #7 · answered by Leigh 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
It's possible he mangled the words as he was saying them and he meant to say something else. But he should know what is scary to another person and for sure, that would be scary for anyone to hear. So good for you that you had the sense to leave. He may wonder what he did wrong. If you feel like you need to explain, you could write him a note and tell him that you felt uncomfortable with some things he said and you don't want to see him anymore. That is - only if you ever feel the need to communicate your reasons...
2007-11-19 14:51:54 · answer #8 · answered by kathyw 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yeah...um, you asked him to start it because you were too sweet and virginal? It's a thing of passion. It was just words coming out of his mouth. I doubt he wants to literally rip you in half. That was more about how he feels how "big" his manhood is. He likes it rough. You need to talk to him and let him know that you are not into that. But don't do it in the bed room. Find a way to talk openly but safely. Lord knows there are plenty of websites out there that could teach you how to talk dirty if you choose to go that route. Not all men are bad, my wife likes it when I talk crazy with her and ditto for me. What is said in the bedroom or car or laundry room or living room or on the rooftop or in a stairwell should stay there. Just don't record anything, videotape anything that can be shared.
2007-11-19 14:55:58 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
It does sound a little scary, but maybe he didn't mean for you to take it that way. If you don't want to talk to him then don't. At least you found out before you married and had kids, etc. But if you love him and think it might work, talk to him about it and explain that it made you uncomfortable. I'm sure you guys could meet in the middle with the dirty talking business.
2007-11-19 14:49:19 · answer #10 · answered by Green Eyed Girl 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Give him a chance to explain. I know you are only 20 years old and you probably have a lot of growing up to do. One of them is to give the guy a common curteousy by answering his phone calls and let him explain. Talk to him. Don't ignore his phone call. He was your boyfriend for 5 months after all. Be a WOMAN and talk to him.
2007-11-19 16:58:39 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋