while under the influence and with the boys, he sleeps with a stranger. It is the only time he has ever cheated and he confesses immediately to his wife. Should he be forgiven?
2007-11-19 13:19:18 · 19 answers · asked by jeff b 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
That is up to his wife decide....Nobody has the right to tell her if she should or shouldn't forgive him....
2007-11-19 13:26:12 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You'd just love everyone on here to say yes and make you feel better, right? Unfortunately, that's not how life really is. What if the shoe were on the other foot...say, she went out with the "girls" and while under the influence, sleeps with a stranger, the only time she has ever cheated...and confesses immediately...should SHE be forgiven? I think you are looking for absolution in the wrong place. Your wife is the only one that can forgive you and it's her choice, not any one else. Besides, you didn't even say you regretted it...just made excuses for why you did it. I think she deserves better...WAY better.
2007-11-19 21:36:52 · answer #2 · answered by swtserenity43 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, if you really love this man and want things to work out then there should be baby steps taken and the couple should automatically start getting marriage counseling.
Just because someone is under the influence of someone or something else doesn't make it any better or any less wrong then it is. That's like saying "Jim" was under the influence of Marijuana & Alcohol while driving, so he should be forgiven and set free for running over little "Jessica" and killing her. No, he can be forgiven but not forgotten and action needs to be taken in order to fix this issue.
2007-11-19 21:27:32 · answer #3 · answered by ♪Msz. Nena♫ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"I was under the influence" is an excuse. He felt bad and that is why he confessed,(at least that was good), but if you stay with him you will be the one that has to deal with the pain for years and years to come. You will be the one with distrust in your heart, always wondering will it happen again, and why did he do you that way. So the bigger question is are you willing to go through this pain, when you did no wrong. On the other hand either way is going to be hard for you. If you stay you will always wonder, if you leave you are leaving fifteen years. GOOD LUCK
2007-11-19 21:36:35 · answer #4 · answered by angel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What does the alcohol and the boys have to do with it? Hasn't he ever heard of the words NO THANKS, I'M HAPPILY MARRIED? Alcohol may influence his decisions but if he'd had you on your mind to begin with, this stranger would have never entered the picture, PERIOD. If you want to forgive him, that's a choice you and you alone must make but if you are honest with yourself, you will never be able to trust him again when he's out of your sight. Maybe the question is ~~ can you live like that?
2007-11-19 21:36:22 · answer #5 · answered by Needtoknow 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well the excuse is the liquor. i know for a fact that is not a good reason. he did it because he wanted to there is no inbetween here. he may have felt guilty and that is why he told his wife. sure and that is why i know it. i have had experiences like that. next time now it will be another item concerning liquor and so on. well if you do i would be prepared to expect more but that is for you to find out take care.
2007-11-19 21:26:10 · answer #6 · answered by Tsunami 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What happens the next time he's "under the influence"? Nice try on the excuse, but it don't work for me. Kick his sorry azz to the curb.
2007-11-20 09:21:08 · answer #7 · answered by Elt 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try the list what u do is get a piece of paper and then on one side write all the good and on the other write all the bad if the good out weighs the bad then yes 4give him but if it doesn’t then no don’t 4give him this has helped me and many of my friends
2007-11-19 21:27:20 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If a man is drunk enough to not know what he is doing he usually cannot perform. I think that he is using this as an excuse. Did he tell because you were going to find out? I could not forgive him.
2007-11-19 21:37:27 · answer #9 · answered by kim h 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No. How could he sleep with a stranger and risk catching an infection or getting her pregnant?
2007-11-19 21:26:16 · answer #10 · answered by blue eyes 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that he should be forgiven, but new lines of comunications need to be opened and it needs to be talked about. Counceling could even be factored in.
2007-11-19 23:08:32 · answer #11 · answered by mysticbaby420 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋