Serious Question: Do You Think My Parents Already Know That I'm A Lesbian?

Question

I haven't come out of the closet yet [Im 16 going on 17] and im definitely not butch. I was just wondering if yall think they know or not. I've never dated any guys, either.

while sitting in the car a month ago my mother said, in reply to me making fun of my brothers girlfriend and saying he must be gay to be dating her 'welll ren, if you were gay i want you to know that id love you just as much'

newdad- do i know you? youre seriously scaring me. dad? i dont think my dad has Y!A though, WHO ARE YOU>>>????

i am 100% lesbian. 100% sure. I was born this way.

Answer 1

omg girl.i remember you.

Answer 2

At 16 they may not know. They may think that you just have other interests than boys. They be in denial and hope that you will just meet the right guy. I would just live your life and wait a while before telling them.

I have a 16 yr old daughter who isn't gay but if she were I would want her to wait until she was in college to really figure it out for herself. I don't know how I would react to PDA's with her and another girl, I don't react well when I see her hold her boyfriends hand.

You are gay, big deal in the grand scheme of things and your parents will be fine and happy if you are fine and happy just cut them a break,OK. It is really hard no matter how open minded you are as a parent to see your chilren become someone that you may not choose to have as a friend if you met them at work but have them still be your child.

I would never turn my back on my kids, but it would be difficult. I just don't get the attraction to another woman, I love being a wife and mother, I love my job, I just would have a hard time understanding what her life would be like. I would question myself as too how she could be fulfilled without the relationships that I have in my life. That is my issue not hers. I guess what I am saying is that the ultimate dealing with your being a lesbian is your parents dealing with thier own feelings and lives and not really too much about your decision or orientation.

You will be just fine and they will too, just give each other the room you may need.

Good luck!

Answer 3

Because you ask this question, it shows that you have worry about 'your parents finding out about it' and how they will react to that information. I think when we have worries like this they eat at ourselves, they bother us the most and this is damaging to ourselves. So thus it is also why I think that it's best to clear up things that worry us, to bring them out into the open and deal with them. Once this is done, then there can at least me a more honest relationship with yourself, and an expression of who you are with those you care about you the most. Because you have this hidden aspect about yourself in regards to your parents, that you don't discuss it with your parents, then the result is there is a 'rift' in the fabric of the relationship. They at least know there is a problem in the relationship, that there is something not being said, and most likely they love you and would like to mend that hole. I think if they know about it or not is not the question, while I can understand that if you knew that they knew, then their reaction would not be one of so much shock to hear you tell them.

I think you need to accept the reality that they probably won't like you telling them this either way, and can expect they might even be shocked. But also you can see that if this is your truth, then hiding it from them is not good for you or them. Then you might be ready to confront the situation and take whatever reaction they have, put it behind you and get on with living in the present moment rather than living in the future -- which is what you are doing when you don't confront situations that are here right now.

Betsy

Answer 4

Are you a lesbian?
You don't sound so sure of yourself.
And if you don't know, then your parents probably don't, either.

You did not tell us whether you've dated any chicks.
I would assume that since you are not publicly dating women then your folks don't know.

For the record, a lot of girls don't date guys or delay dating for a variety of other reasons that have nothing to do with sexual preference.

Answer 5

Just because you never bring guys home that doesn't mean anything. I never bought my dates home because my parents are nosy and will say anything to them and not care.Why would you think they know? or even care? It's about to be 08' Some parents are preparing themselves for this kind of talk in case there kids are. More people are out today than in any other time. I wouldn't worry about it right now if I were you.. They probably just think you are a normal good girl

Answer 6

They already know. At least your mom does. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if your mom related to you that at some point in her life she had felt she had feelings for girls too. That's happened with a few girls I know... even very conservative moms.
Anyway... after reading the additional details, I think your mom is prepared for you to come out of the closet, and she's setting the stage to let you do that.

Answer 7

nah , you are fine ..just relax. just try to change their minds before you come out . Show them a movie about lesbians or something and make them talk to a friend of yours and tell them she's a lesbian ( she must take part in it also ) and ask them to console her

this way they will start to feel good towards the concept.
anyway , maybe you don't even need this
bye.

Answer 8

They may have a question or two in their head but no parent really guesses that their child is homosexual unless the have some serious reason to believe so. If you want them to know you should sit them down and have that conversation with them.

Answer 9

If they are not 'modern thinkers' the thought probably never crossed their minds. Otherwise, if they know their daughter, they may well have a clue. Don't worry too much, they love you and they'll come around in time.

Answer 10

I have a 17 year old, and I would be shocked to learn if she were gay. I think that unless you give very strong clues, they don't know. Also, parents don't always notice things that they don't WANT to notice.

Answer 11

Well, have your parents given you that "funny look" yet? Have they asked you if you have a boyfriend? There's a 50/50 chance that they know. If they don't, then u should eventually suck up your gut and tell them. Hope this helps!