How to stop thinking about what you ex is going to do next???

Question

My ex is an extrememly hateful person. I have never dated someone so terrible in my life. We have a 7 month old baby together. We have been split up for about 6 months and he already has a live in gf who has 2 kids. He does not pay support, he lies to me, refuses to pay support, and knowing the back stabbing 2 faced person he is I am scared of what he might do next. I have a fear that he is going to try and get custody just to avoid paying support. I dont really think he can accomplish winning, but he is a snake and nothing he does suprises me. I dont know his new gf but I know him and I know both of them have called the police on my telling lies to try and get me arrested. I hate those people and would like to know how I can find out what they are up to without doing it illegally.

Answer 1

Get a decent attorney, he or she will know how to handle it. you can make this go away with one phone call to an attorney.

At the very least, sue for support - exercise your legal rights instead of just bitching. If you don't already have an order for support, get one. Establish paternity (is he named as the father on the birth certificate?), sue for support, if he doesn't pay, get a lien on his assets or garnish his wages - the court will do this for you if you report his non-payment.

And document the harassment - if they called the police on you for purely malicious reasons, ask the police to see the records. In most cases, police reports are a matter of public record, and you're entitled to see anything you're named in. Then use it to get a restraining order. They can be arrested for making false reports, you know, if in fact they are doing that.

And if there's a real pattern of harassment, you can sue for your legal costs, too. He can refuse to pay child support and any judgments against him, but once he's "in the system", they can just garnish his wages. Anywhere he works, forever, you get your cut before he even gets his paycheck.

But you gotta go to court and sue for support to make that happen. Establish paternity, sue for support, and get a restraining order.

You need to do this for your child's sake, not yours. It's not about "getting even" or any petty crap like that - it's about protecting your child's future. He owes, make him pay. If he's a menace, make him stay away. The legal system will help you. The laws are on your side, but you have to initiate things.

His rights include visitation. He may want a custody agreement. You pretty much have to allow that, if he's really the father. But his past behavior, if you document and submit it (again, ask a lawyer for help), should help you there. You may well be granted sole custody, or he'll get very minimal rights. Sounds like that's best for all. But if you get an order of child support, and he still doesn't pay, you're in the clear. "Deadbeat dads" who don't pay child support don't have much of a chance in a custody battle, so that's a needless worry. And with an order in place, they'll just garnish his wages if he fails to pay.

But the most import thing to keep in mind is, he's no longer part of your life. Don't let him be, even if he tries, even if he calls, baits you, spreads gossip, etc. If he calls, hang up. If he texts you, don't reply. Block his number, email, everything. If he needs to talk to you, he can send a letter. Preferably to your attorney. And preferably with a child support check enclosed. Cut him out completely, and don't let him drag you down to his level. Just be better than this ***. Deal with him through the court system. It's better if you have NO CONTACT WHATSOEVER with him. Be better than him. Behave better, talk better, act better. Be the superior person, and let the court take care of things.

Answer 2

No judge in his right mind is going to give custody to a father that isn't paying support. Something in his actions will come back to haunt him. Just live your life and take care of your baby. Write this guy off as a bad mistake and set your life up so that you can work and raise the baby. If you are afraid of him, get a restraining order and call every time he (or she) breaks it.

Answer 3

as long as u are involved with him u will wonder when he is going to do something else to u. u have a right to fear a person like this, distance yourself as much as u can, u can't control or even know what they are up to until it happens. there seems to be a good chance he will go for custody to avoid child support. don't let them know your business, or anything about u, so they won't have anything to use against u. don't have any mutual friends either, cut all ties with him if u can. move away from them.

Answer 4

You have been performed with, sorry. You dated an entire 365 days and he purely magically met the affection of his existence at a social gathering you weren't invited to. Come on! How stupid does he think of you're? do no longer settle for that! You deserve greater! You deserve the actuality simply by fact he's in no way telling it. Be smart!

Answer 5

Get a order for child support and a order for protection, and stop worrying about what he's up to . Start a new life and consider him the reason

Answer 6

Get a life. I'm not trying to be mean but literally do something fun. Have a hobby. If not then get one. If the dude is a idiot - FORGET HIM! Occupy, occupy yourself.

Answer 7

You have many beautiful things ahead of you...he is history if you want...enough about him and what his plans are.. ,its about you and your baby now. Think about ways of improving your current situations. Your life is very important to your child now.and dont **** with it.

Answer 8

Hire a private investigator.

Good luck.

Answer 9

Hi,

Do something that will take ur mind off it.
Rgds..............