Those who have actually visited the Middle East, what is your perception of how Women are treated?

Question

Having spend some time in Israel, I have had some first hand opinions and interaction with women in the Middle East, both from Jewish and Moslem backgrounds, as my partner worked extensively in education on Public Health over there.

I often hear comments relating to how "oppressed" women are, and while it is certainly true that womens roles are often very different to those of women in say England or the US, I am not sure that their lives are as the western media portrays them.

Sure, there are different expectations of dress, and different types of marriages, yet the middle eastern women I have directly encountered have been strong, vital figures in their families, respected within their society, strongly opinionated and passionate.

There are certainly areas in which they do not have equal rights, and aspects of culture which I personally find hard to stomach, but as to whether they are oppressed - that is a complex question.

What are your impressions?

Answer 1

First let me say, I've never traveled to the Middle East, I've lived in the U.S.A. all my life. I currently live in Idaho.

So how the heck could I have anything but a redneck, hillbilly opinion about how women are treated in the Middle East?

I raise meat goats....all of my customers come to my farm, and slaughter the goats right here. It took a while for my customers to accept doing business with me (a woman). Now that they do, I've had some very interesting chats with them about all the taboo subjects....politics, religion, and the sexes.

I 100% agree with your statement, "but as to whether they are oppressed - that is a complex question."

I'm a fiercly indepandant Amercian woman. I live on a permaculture farm. My husbands job can take him away for as long as a month at a time. That means I'm here alone on a rural farm, caring for over 100 animals (goats, rabbits, horses, dogs) alone. I've gone through an entire kidding season alone (trust me, that a lot of work). That actually happened this past February. It was bitterly cold. Not only were the does kidding, but I was keeping neighbors driveways plowed with our tractors.

Yet I have something in common with some of the Middle East women...I don't expect to work outside the home (farm) ever. I am a stay home wife, period, end of story.

I was chatting with my customers, and asking them about women in their countries. One of them piped up and told me his mother and sisters were "so spoiled, so spoiled." They got everything they asked for, and never had to work for it. The other guys with him totally agreed. They went on to tell me how their mothers and sisters acted. It sounded, very often more like spoiled 3 year olds. Women would ask for something....if it was not immediatly forthcoming, they would pitch a fit, and get their way.

Of course they also all have servants to take care of most of the household chores. These were Saudi Arabian men I was talking to, by the way. Women of this very oil rich country are quiet indulged.

Yes it is most certainly true there are freedoms they do not have. But in some ways it is a trade off. No, they cannot drive...but almost all of them have male chauffeurs and pretty much go where they want....which is to visit female friends/relatives, and go shopping.

Frankly, being able to spend ones day shopping in fancy malls is the ideal dream life of many American women. Don't have to work, get to spend the day shopping, someone else is going to pay the bill? A lot of women would jump at that lifestyle, even if a headscarf was part of the deal, or a head to toe burqa.

When my Muslim customers first started to come to my farm, there were some funny/tense moments. They ALL wanted to know where my husband was. Those who had seen my strapping 6'3" husband wanted to be SURE he was not going to come home and be angry that A) they were there alone with his wife (me) and B) he was not going to be mad I was selling off the family wealth (the goats). Now that they have come to accept that it is ok to do business with me, they tend to treat me a bit more like a man.

Per conversations I've had with them, they expect women to be quiet, and listen while they are speaking. They also do not expect women to know as much as them...but not because they concider women to be stupid. They just concider women to be sheltered and indulged, and not nearly so worldly, nor knowledgable as the men. Hence the opinions of the women do not count for as much, because they really may NOT know what they are talking about, due to their sheltered lives.

I do think however, for the women from the poor areas, who are not reaping the bennifits of oil wealth, life can be very difficult. I had a customer from Yemin. He was very friendly, and loved my two farm cats. He would tell me how important cats were to his family. The cats lived in the courtyard, where the women and children spent most of their time. The cats would alert humans to the presence of venemous snakes, and help save the lives of the children. This fellows mother and sisters have a much harder life, having no servants, and to do the work themselves.

Still, they live as a family group, with constant family interaction....so unlike Americans, who may only call their syblings at Christmas time, or just send a card at most. It is so important to them to interact with, and have strong family bonds. Children and babies never lack for attention.

So unlike the two year old I saw at Pizza Hut a few weeks ago. He was there with his parents. They never spoke to the tot. The back of his head was nearly flat, and missing most of its hair....a sign the child spends a GREAT deal of time laying in a crib. They had a baby also in a baby carrier. They kept a blanket over the carrier the entire time, and never lifted it, to check the baby. The parents themselves chatted away...but didn't include the tot in the slightest, other than to hand him a hunk of pizza.

A Middle Eastern household would be horrified at such treatment of children, and babies.

The biggest problem is, we are different cultures, and different religions. Just because a different culture or religion is "not for you," does not automatically make it wrong.

Heck, I'm LDS (Mormon). A lot of people think the LDS religion is a cult, that I run about in long dresses, and hubby is married to 12 other wives...not hardly! ~lol~ Do you have any idea how hard it is to drive a tractor in a dress? As for the other wives...well they darn well better show up, and start doing some of the farm chores and pulling their weight!

So basically my opinion is, that just because it's different, it's not automatically wrong.

~Garnet
Homesteading/Farming over 20 years

Answer 2

Experienced Saudi Arabia and Kuwait.
No the women we encountered were not oppressed.
The Western World regards the Eastern World in such a strange way.
Culture is different.
Far be it for me The Westerner to tell The Easterner how they should conduct their lives.
Hypocritical in the extreme would that be.

Twilight- Keep posting like this and "Yoda Lomax"
will be sitting at your feet.

Answer 3

"oppression" and "empowerment" are issues that must be defined by those experiencing them first and foremost.

my experience being in the middle east is that while there are certain aspects of life here that some westerners may see as oppressive, and there are definitely some social problems with regards to relations between the sexes, the vast majority of women do what they are going to do. One of my Arabic teachers is a female who is obtaining her doctorate but who also wears the hijab abd the jilbab. A lot of women here wear the hijab, but a lot of them dont. I wouldnt say that women here are as "oppressed" as the West would like to believe. the society here is rapidly improving the lives of women and the feminist movement here is in its infancy, but a good deal of the institutional problems are gone.

my female arab friends are very much like my american female friends. they are less sexually active, and mostly live with their families if they are not married, but otherwise, they are not very different at all.

Answer 4

In Syria a woman is the Vice President, I guess that never happened in the US, hope clinton wins just so she breaks the rule!!

there are also women MP's and what name you. time for Americans to get a reality check. Saudi Arabia is not the whole of the middle east!!

Answer 5

ME is a big and diverse place; women's lot in - for example - Jordan and Lebanon and Afghanistan and Iran - are radically different.

edit: Bohemian
You are describing a very tiny percentage of the women of the ME. I have seen them shopping at Harrods as well - but this wealthy elite are NOT representative of the vast majority of women.

Answer 6

The woman generally rule the home,but any lessening of equal rights in any country or religious order is not acceptable.Women everywhere should have the same rights as men,it is only when you get people chasing extra rights above everyone else that you get very strong feelings,such as special extra rights for certain minority groups who just want to be different.differing cultures run their lives their way,its nothing to do with us if they accept it,that is their choice.

Answer 7

I have lived in Sharjah & Dubai in United Arab Emirates and visited Doha. I live in India and India has the largest number of Muslims in the world, second to Malasia. My perceptions and thoughts are in similar lines as what you have described in your question. I am a Hindu.

Answer 8

yes..it is a complex question..
but i tell you this, here in Egypt, around 40% of the families are leaded and funded by women, for different reasons...as you said, there are some people who misuse power and authority in all over the world. but the image about us is always biased, that's a fact..

Answer 9

did you hear about the woman who got rapped n is getting 20 lashes n thrown in jail because she has sex before marriage