Whch should I stop paying: the mortgage or the credit cards?

Question

I've been divorced for 1 1/2 years, our house remains on the market and I've paid most of the mortgage since then. It was 2 months behind then went in "reduced payment" for the past 3 months. The lender now wants the regular full payment plus installments on the overdue amount. At this point I must either stop paying my personal debts, all currently in perfect standing, including credit cards w/$30,000+ balance and $800 in minimums, or give up on the mortgage.

This may seem like a no-brainer ("avoid foreclosure") but then there is the matter of my ex having obligated herself in our divorce agreement to fully pay the mortgage in exchange for what she expected would be "full proceeds" on our home's sale. Obviously that backfired, but since my name is on the mortgage, I'm still on the hook. So, which way do I benefit most or suffer least? Give up on personal debts or let the mortgage go? I've already had a couple lenders extend courtesies to me after documenting that agreemen

My ex has nothing to recuperate in court. She can't even afford to pay for food and heat. My only benefit to taking her to court is an order that will effectively change nothing, and I'm out $100+ in filing fees, etc.

Answer 1

1. Even if she said that, it's not legally binding unless it's on paper.

2. DO NOT stop paying your mortgage. Your name's on the note, it's your debt. It doesn't matter if she said she would pay it, it's your debt.

3. Would you rather be homeless and have a happy credit card company or still have a place to stay and have the CC company calling you every day?

STOP paying your credit card. They'll deal with it. They won't be happy, but they can't take your house. If you stop paying your mortgage it could go into foreclosure.

I don't want to sound like a jerk, but here's what I suggest you do:

1. Stop all non-essential bills. Cancel cable or satellite. No more eating out until you get through this mess.

2. Get a job delivering pizzas in the evening.

3. Get on a written budget.

4. Get a lawyer. If there is indeed a paper from the court that says she has to pay, then you have a case. If not, you can still try and get her to pay, but the good news is, if she's isn't legally obligated to pay, you get to keep your share of the money from the house (if there were no stipulations as to where that money went before this mess started.)

Take things one step at a time and you'll through this.

Good luck! Hope this helps!

Answer 2

It's up to you really, you know what is more important to you but if you get in trouble with your mortgage you risk losing the home, maybe you want to keep that.

RE:
Whch should I stop paying: the mortgage or the credit cards?
I've been divorced for 1 1/2 years, our house remains on the market and I've paid most of the mortgage since then. It was 2 months behind then went in "reduced payment" for the past 3 months. The le...

Answer 3

Wow. Seems like you are between a rock and hard place and there are no easy answers. Ideallistically you should pay for both of them. You are in a dilemna, give up on the house or screw up your credit by giving up on credit card debt. Talk to the lender and see if he is willing to extend the amortization as this will reduce the payment siginificantly. In the meantime pay your credit card bill and reduce the price of the house so you can sell the house quicker.
See a lawyer to see what you an do to have your ex honor her agreement. Good luck

Answer 4

If there is no way to balance both, I would say the best solution would be to let the mortgage go for the time being. It's better in the long run to keep a good credit history, especially if in your divorce agreement, your ex agreed to make the house payments.

Answer 5

I would let go of the credit card payments. Actually, I would still make payments, just not near what I was supposed to be. It is more impt to avoid forclosure. If you foreclose, you will most certainly have a very hard time qualifing for any other mortgages in the future, and even passing credit checks for rentals.

Answer 6

Since your house is already over 2 months behind, your credit rating is already affected. Therefore, I would say keep the house and pay the credit cards last. In addition, you can call the credit card companies and negotiate your payments, they may or may not knock off interest or any fees that you have incurred.

Answer 7

first take ur ex back to court since she is not living up to her end of the bargain...then talk to credit cards see if they can work something else out until you get this mortgage thing straighten out.... maybe a 2nd job if thats possible...

Answer 8

Talk to your ex and explain if they don't pay the mortgage you will both lose all equity. Sell the house for what you owe on it if you can.

Answer 9

neither -- downsize your life style and get rid of cable and internet which will save several bucks a month and get a second job since you will not be on answers and watching tv!!!!