Why is my daddy so unreasonable?

Question

Yesterday I just got home from for a week off for Thanksgiving after not being home (I was at boarding school) for over three months. I got in some trouble at school maybe one to two weeks or so after I got there and they called him and he is still angry about it and punished me yesterday. What is extremely ridiculous is that I didn't get in any trouble at all after that so why is making a big deal over something that happened almost three months ago, I told him to just get over it but he told me not to tell him how to parent and to watch my mouth.

I am disgusted, I mean we haven't seen each other in months so why is he more focused on punishing me when he should be extremely pleased to see me. He told me I was warned not to get in any trouble or cause him to get calls about so I have no one to blame but myself, so I told him to consider blaming himself for some mediocre parenting that is focused on negativity.

Why is my daddy so unreasonable?

Thank you and good day,

To nameless, yes I know I am spoiled and I glad you're able to spell simple words. Thank you and good day.

Kate deleted her answer, she must have been embarrassed. Thank you and good day.

Biased, mediocre answers from Danny S and KLeighsMommy, let's just say I am disgusted. Thank you and good day,

Same applies to "Someone"; disgusted with the answer. Thank you and good day.

Thank you Emawee.

"Someone", right back at you, thank you and good day.

Also disgusted with extremely mean spirited answers from mzAmberMReed, JosephK
Michaell, gg22bibiz, Mich1, VatsuX.

I am sure they are all embarrassed in retrospect. Thank you and good day.

Victoria why are you so annoyed...you should e-mail me back and I can help you overcome your disgust. Thank you and good day.

Answer 1

Hi Lori, nice to hear from you.Well in answer to your question in most cases as a parent I felt that accountability for ones actions ( rather than punishment,because accountability is about learning from a situation and taking responsibility for it) should be as soon as possible after the event rather than deferred for any length of time.I don't know what problems you had at boarding school but I'm reasonably certain the school addressed it at the time. I'm fairly certain your dad had high expectations that your behavior would change at boarding school.He is probably disappointed about the phone calls.He probably feels you've let him down. You are disappointed because you were looking forward to going home and being with friends and family.I hope you and your dad can get things worked out so you don't waste your time together by both being angry.Life is too short to always be at odds with those we love.Thanksgiving is a time to be thankful for all the blessings we have in our life and that includes the love and support of our family.You do not want to go back to boarding school without resolving this issue.It will only fester over time.Never leave anyone on bad terms. Wishing you and your family a Happy Thanksgiving. I'm from Canada so I've already celebrated Thanksgiving in October.I know all the things I'm thankful for.Take care.your friend, Gussie

Answer 2

Im not going to call you spoiled because obviously you find pleasure in it. But Ill at least say that you should take what your dad says at least they CARE enough to punish you would you have been happier if youd have gotten home and they didnt even say hi? Some kids have that instead so yea you should take a look at your parents who care about you so much and be glad that they didnt leave you there for thanksgiving. Hes not being unreasonable, well not entirely, he couldnt punish you 3 months ago but now that you are home he can show his disapproval for your actions. Thats alot less embarassing than him showing up at the school personally then and punishing you now isnt it? You said he did tell you before you left not to get in trouble so he has a right to be mad because you didnt listen to him. They pay alot for your schooling and they could have just sent you to public school where you wouldnt get the best education. Your parents care tell them thanks as it is thanksgiving ;-)

Answer 3

Your dad is not being unreasonable. You got in trouble, therefore you get punished. The only thing is your father doesn't see you every day so he had to wait till you got home to punish you. He needs to warn you and punish you otherwise you will soon think he is a pushover. He is really glad to see you home but also disappointed in how you acted at school. Now he is probably just angry you were so mean to him. You only have a week with him so grow up and make the most of it!

Answer 4

Well, that's annoying.

I'd point it out subtly. "Honestly, Daddy, I haven't seen you in three months? Can't we just catch up and have fun for the next week?"

If that doesn't work, just try to enjoy yourself anyway. You can; it's not like you're in solitary confinement.

I'm sorry I can't be of more help Lor. I'm trying, but I'm stressed right now. But very happy to hear from you!

Hope all goes well.

I'll edit this when I'm feeling a little less annoyed.

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Answer 5

I understand how you're really feel. Your daddy is little tough on you? I wish I know how old you're. Why he so unreasonable? There are no perfect person, you probably know it. He can be an achiever, very successful in his life and a good provider, works like a horse, so he expects lots from you. Then you fails or makes mistake even in the past, it disappoints him badly. Hurts him inside badly. Since you were not getting any trouble again, if I were him, I just let go the past and enjoy a good family time. But sometimes it is not easy to do. Men are lots different than women. Some have very sensitive feelings. You seems a smart one, so just give a little time to your daddy, you know, do not get upset, it is not good for your health. If you can be smart and be patient, you will make one adult to learn lesson. The lesson is "Forgive and Forget"! Happy Thanksgiving.

Answer 6

That is crazy. If it happened a while ago shouldn't he care more about the fact that you haven't gotten into any trouble recently. That really is unreasonable.

Answer 7

You should not speak to your father that way. I agree with you that to punish you three months after an event does not sound reasonable, and after a three month separation, your reunion should be a happy time, but you have no business backtalking to your father like that. I applaud your father for being a father and not putting up with your smart mouth.

Answer 8

It sounds like someone hasn't learned from her mistake. Obviously you deserve to be punished if you still haven't had to deal with the consequences. Maybe you'll think twice about getting in trouble again.

He's your father. That's what he's supposed to do. If he just let you off the hook for every bad thing you did, he'd be a crappy dad. It sounds like he's a good father who's trying hard to keep you in line. I think it is YOU that is being unreasonable.

Answer 9

Why do you ask questions if you don't truly want answers, you just want people to agree with you. And when they don't agree, you have a little hissy! Do everyone a favor, grow up and learn some responsibility for your actions.

FYI-"Thank you and good day" does not make you polite!

Answer 10

Daddy is right. He should forget the holidays and send you back, I am sure they have some program. In Charm School, didn't they teach you to respect your elders? Respect your father, because he is the only one you have, and one day he won't be here. I think you are the unreasonable one.