TERRIBLE WRITER! Need proofreading help! Much appreciated.?

Question

Okay, I wrote an essay, and bascially I need someone to proofread it, and make suggestions on how I can improve it, I'm going to post it at the bottom of this. Guaranteed best answer!

The positive direction my life is taking sometimes seems incomprehensible to me. This astonishment lies in that fact have I have not always been a great student. At one point in time I turned-in mediocre work for mediocre grades; I was perfectly satisfied with my efforts. Its seems only yesterday my future was a dull flicker of a flame. At the present, I am first in my class at Riley High School, I participate in nine after school activities ( four of which I hold leadership roles in). I am well on my way to success. My journey to this point in my life has been a great one.

In my third grade year, my teacher decided to recommend me for the DEPTH program. This was a class meant for adept students. Fortunately for me, I was a quick learner. Nevertheless I struggled; Monday homework, Tuesday homework, Wednesday homework, Thursday homework, and even Friday! This class was way too much for my mediocre effort. I began to realize that if I wanted to obtain even decent grades in this class I would need to try harder. By my sixth grade year in DEPTH, I had finally began achieving my “just above par” grades once again. But I could only keep my head above water for so long.

Eventually I made the transition to middle school. The teachers changed, the atmosphere changed, but the work did not. There was still a mess of it each and every day. Fortunately (not unfortunately) for me, my charade could no longer persist. I finally received the red, accursed, glaring, “F” on my report card. This was in Algebra, ironically today, one of my favorite subjects. Through my years of schooling until then, my mom had expressed her disappointment with my grades, but I never really listened to her. At the drop of the news, my mom made sure she unleashed every thought she had held silent for so long. I had never heard or seen her so disappointed in me. For once, I was disappointed in myself.

My mom quickly became a woman of action. At parent teacher conferences, she practically begged my teachers for help. At the time I was embarrassed of her because I thought she was being overly dramatic, but now I hold pride in my mom’s willingness to fight for me. I even better understand why she fought so hard; fear and love. What was she afraid of? She was afraid that I would stop caring altogether. She was afraid that I thought I would never amount to anything. She was afraid that I would just blend in with the rest of my African-American peers, who achieved less than satisfactory grades. She was afraid that that “F” would define me forever.

By the end of conferences three teachers had volunteered to help me. The problem was, the real decision remained up to me. Help was being offered, but I was under no obligation to accept it. My choices were to either take the help being offered and look to a brighter future, or I could just simply be one of many, like my mother feared. While the latter ate at me, I chose to accept the tutoring sessions. The promise that those three teachers, my mom, and many others saw in me started to mean something to me. I decided to take responsibility for my actions and my education. My grades would no longer “happen” to me, I would earn them.

With this help my grades began to improve. Again, someone saw promise in me, so I was recommended to attend Lasalle Intermediate Academy. a whole school, for above par students. My eight grade year, would be the first year to truly use the tools that were given to me.

The years have been very kind. With the help offered to me I was able to improve me grades. I was even recommended for Lasalle Intermediate Academy, a school for exceptional students, in the eighth grade. There I impressed my teachers so much, one teacher said to my mother, “Your daughter is a genius!” At this she rolled her eyes, but the pride in her smile was evident. I was finally living up to my potential.

Lasalle made the transition to High School painless for me. I take the hardest classes available because I like challenging myself for sport. I have even developed a love for math and science, subjects I once to loathed. Mediocre is NEVER acceptable for me. Without the support of my mom, teachers, friends, and strength from God, I would be nowhere near where I am today. They teach me that I can do anything I set my mind to . . . and I have.

Answer 1

Here are my corrections, incorporated within.

The positive direction my life is taking sometimes seems incomprehensible to me. This astonishment lies in the fact that I have not always been a great student. In the past, I turned in mediocre work for mediocre grades; I was perfectly satisfied with my efforts. Its seems only yesterday my future was a dull flicker of a flame.

Presently, I am first in my class at Riley High School, I participate in nine after-school-activities ( four of which I hold leadership roles in). I am well on my way to success. My journey now in my life has been a great one.

In my third grade year, my teacher decided to recommend me for the DEPTH program. This was a class meant for adept students. Fortunately for me, I was a quick learner. Nevertheless, I struggled; Monday homework, Tuesday homework, Wednesday homework, Thursday homework, and even Friday! This class was way too much for my mediocre efforts. I soon realized that if I wanted to obtain even decent grades in this class I would need to try harder. By my sixth grade year in DEPTH, I had finally began achieving my “just above par” grades once again. But I could only keep my head above water for so long.

Eventually I made the transition to middle school. The teachers and the atmosphere changed, but the work did not. There was still a mess of it each and every day. Fortunately (not unfortunately) for me, my charade could no longer persist. I finally received the red, accursed, glaring, “F” on my report card. This was in Algebra, which ironically today, is one of my favorite subjects. Through my years of schooling until then, my mom had expressed her disappointment with my grades, but I never really listened to her. At the drop of the news, Mom made sure she unleashed every thought she had held silent for so long. I had never heard or seen her so disappointed in me. For once, I was disappointed in myself.

My mom quickly became a woman of action. At parent- teacher conferences, she practically begged my teachers for help. At the time, I was embarrassed of her because I thought she was being overly dramatic, but now I hold pride in my mom’s willingness to fight for me.

I now better understand why she fought so hard; fear and love. What was she afraid of? She was afraid that I would stop caring altogether. She was afraid that I thought I would never amount to anything. She was afraid that I would just blend in with the rest of my African-American peers, who achieved less than satisfactory grades. She was afraid that that “F” would define me forever.

By the end of the conferences, three teachers had volunteered to help me. The problem was that the real decision remained up to me. Help was being offered, but I was under no obligation to accept it. My choices were to either take the help being offered and look to a brighter future, or I could just simply be one of many, like my mother feared. While the latter ate at me, I chose to accept the tutoring sessions. The promise that those three teachers, my mom, and many others saw in me began to give clarity in purpose. I decided to take responsibility for my actions and my education. My grades would no longer “happen” to me, I would earn them.

With this help my grades began to improve. Again, someone saw promise in me, so I was recommended to attend a school for above-par students. My eighth grade year would be the first year to truly use the tools that were given me.

The years have been very kind. With that help offered, I was able to improve my grades. I was even recommended for Lasalle Intermediate Academy, a school for exceptional students, in the eighth grade. There, so impressed my teachers became, that one teacher said to my mother, “Your daughter is a genius!” At this, she rolled her eyes, but the pride in her smile was evident. I was finally living up to my potential.

Lasalle made the transition to High School painless for me. I now take the hardest classes available because I like challenging myself for sport. I have even developed a love for math and science, subjects I once to loathed. Mediocre is never (italicize instead of all caps) acceptable for me.

Without the support of my mom, teachers, friends, and strength from God, I would be nowhere near where I am today. They teach me that I can do anything I set my mind to. I live by that premise.

Answer 2

The Iraqui Operation, launched on March 20, 2003 in which the U.S. invaded Iraqui; have grown Americans tired of empty promises of Iraqi independence and weary of the severe costs, lives and money to fund the war during these four years. While at the launching of the war 70% of the population approved it; by September 2007, there was a noticeable drop to 30%. The disapproval and disbelief for the war increases, the need for a pull out before the mission is accomplished becomes even more evident. Not only America is running out of money, but also out of patience for the Iraqui War. Hm... I actually speak spanish, and english is not my native language... But I'm bored haha. Sorry if its's not useful.

Answer 3

The direction my life is taking sometimes seems incomprehensible to me. This astonishment lies in the fact that I have not always been a great student. At one point in time I turned in mediocre work for mediocre grades and I was perfectly satisfied with my efforts. Its seems only yesterday my future was a dull flicker of a flame. At the present, I am first in my class at Riley High School and I participate in nine after school activities ( four of which I hold leadership roles in). I am well on my way to success. My journey to this point in my life has been a great one.

In my third grade year, my teacher decided to recommend me for the DEPTH program. This was a class meant for adept students. Fortunately for me, I was a quick learner. Nevertheless, I struggled; Monday homework, Tuesday homework, Wednesday homework, Thursday homework, and even Friday! This class was way too much for my mediocre effort. I began to realize that if I wanted to obtain even decent grades in this class I would need to try harder. By my sixth grade year in DEPTH, I had finally began achieving my “just above par” grades once again. But I could only keep my head above water for so long.

Eventually I made the transition to middle school. The teachers changed, the atmosphere changed, but the work did not. There was still a mess of it each and every day. Fortunately (not unfortunately) for me, my charade could no longer persist. I finally received the red, accursed, glaring, “F” on my report card. This was in Algebra, ironically today, one of my favorite subjects. Through my years of schooling until then, my mom had expressed her disappointment with my grades, but I never really listened to her. At the drop of the news, my mom made sure she unleashed every thought she had held silent for so long. I had never heard or seen her so disappointed in me. For once, I was disappointed in myself.

My mom quickly became a woman of action. At parent teacher conferences, she practically begged my teachers for help. At the time I was embarrassed of her because I thought she was being overly dramatic, but now I hold pride in my mom’s willingness to fight for me. I even better understand why she fought so hard; fear and love. What was she afraid of? She was afraid that I would stop caring altogether. She was afraid that I thought I would never amount to anything. She was afraid that I would just blend in with the rest of my African-American peers, who achieved less than satisfactory grades. She was afraid that that “F” would define me forever.

By the end of conferences three teachers had volunteered to help me. The problem was, the real decision remained up to me. Help was being offered, but I was under no obligation to accept it. My choices were to either take the help being offered and look to a brighter future, or I could just simply be one of many, like my mother feared. While the latter ate at me, I chose to accept the tutoring sessions. The promise that those three teachers, my mom, and many others saw in me started to mean something to me. I decided to take responsibility for my actions and my education. My grades would no longer “happen” to me, I would earn them.

With this help my grades began to improve. Again, someone saw promise in me, so I was recommended to attend Lasalle Intermediate Academy. A whole school, for above par students. My eight grade year, would be the first year to truly use the tools that were given to me.

The years have been very kind. With the help offered to me I was able to improve my grades. **I was so proud of gaining entrance to Lasalle.** There I impressed my teachers so much, one teacher said to my mother, “Your daughter is a genius!” At this she rolled her eyes, but the pride in her smile was evident. I was finally living up to my potential.

Lasalle made the transition to High School painless for me. I take the hardest classes available now because I like challenging myself for sport. I have even developed a love for math and science, subjects I had once loathed. Mediocre is NEVER acceptable for me. Without the support of my mom, teachers, friends, and strength from God, I would be nowhere near where I am today. They teach me that I can do anything I set my mind to . . . and I have.



Some typos, some odd sentence structures, but overall not bad. I fixed anything that bothered me as I read it. You used the full name of the Lasalle school twice within 10 seconds of reading time, so I modified the sentence a tad in the second appearance of the school. It's surrounded by 2 asterisks.

Answer 4

just check your spelling and use of the tenses of the verb. no offense but it was really long and there was a lot of corrections. just go to microsoft word and the software might spot other mistakes. hope it helped!!

Answer 5

COULD YOU REPEAT THE QUESTION