I am in love with my friends ex-wife.?

Question

This is my predicament. I have known Sophie (my mates wife) for maybe 6 years. I always found her attractive and as I got to know her she became more and more beautiful to me. She was going out with an aquaintence but that aquaintence is now a good friend of mine too. 3 years ago when they were on a break (and the aquaintence was still an aquaintence), we started a relationship. I fell deeply in love with her and she said she loved me but I knew that she still loved Bob and I was going through alcohol addiction problems and was not ready for commitment. She got back with Rob when I said to her that I couldn't commit which was inevitable. A year after that, they got married. I went to the wedding because me and Sophie had still remained the greatest of mates and Bob was becoming closer too.
2 months ago, the marriage ended and me and Sophie are the best of mates but I love her and want to be with her but I am scared of telling her incase we ruin our friendship. What should I do?

It also gets a bit more complicated. For teh last year I have abstained from desire (sex, drugs and rock and roll) and was seriously preparing to become a buddhist monk but she has sent me crazy in the last few months and I am filled with desire again. I am not sure if a girl is worth sacrificing contentment for. I do love her more than anything I have ever loved though and I am fearful of making a mistake. I know that worst comes to worse, I tell her, I loose her, I meditate for a decade and everything will be okay I suppose.

Answer 1

Tell her, she isn't married anymore

Answer 2

Tell her you have feelings for her but you feel that you should wait a bit until she is over her divorce and he is over his hurt(bob).
People go through emotional flip flops during and after a divorce and she needs time to heal.

Answer 3

be gentle, and be patient, but with the way you feel yes you should let her know