we have been married for 8 years, and went to vegas last week, now were not big drinkers, but i did lots of gamboling and drank lots of jack daniels and coke, and blue hawaii's, very drunk, well my husband wanted to buy me a lap dance, and we did, then we went to the room and he bought a girl to the room out of a book, i was so drunk i could hardly hold up my head, i was at the point of alcohol poison, he said i participated some, but i remember looking up and he was having sex with her, i dont remember him paying attention to me at all. Now he's sorry, and i can't get that picture oput of my mind?? What can i do?? He did wear protection, but things can still happen all around that! I'm having a hard time right now
2007-11-18
09:32:53
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15 answers
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asked by
kkeelstylist
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in
Family & Relationships
➔ Marriage & Divorce
How much of these events did you agree to, and during what stage did you agree to them?
It's a shame that your husband let you get into that state in the first place. He should be looking after you, not taking advantage. Sounds like it wasn't really a threesome at all, more like him and this other girl, and you a drunken bystander.
This is no way to treat your wife, especially if you have never done anything like this before. Alcohol can have a terrible effect on everyone's inhibitions, and it sounds like it got the better of both of you that night.
I would say try to get past this. Talk it through, but leave out any details, just make it clear how it has made you feel. And make sure that in future your husband is more aware of your alcohol limits, and that you may agree to things when drunk that you really didn't want to do. He should know you well enough by now to know when you have had enough, and know whether you are really up for something, or if it is just the drink talking.
And try not to drink so much in future anyway. It's really not good for you in so many ways.
2007-11-18 09:43:43
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answer #1
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answered by helly 6
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First of all where is this hotel you stayed at in Vegas? Because when I went there I stayed at the Belagio and that was not on the menu. Secondly, Your husband should have protected you and your relationship instead of cheating on you. Thirdly: STOP DRINKING> and lastly, I seriously doubt that you will ever forget about this.
2007-11-18 17:56:24
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answer #2
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answered by Darla 5
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Sounds like you two should take a serious break from each other, sort things out individually. Time apart is sometimes the best healer, it will let you know if you really want to be together or not.
2007-11-18 18:14:13
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answer #3
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answered by WestCoastin4Life 7
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I assume that he was drinking, too (?). If so, then let this be a lesson to you both to KNOCK IT OFF with the excessive drinking, even if it is "only" when you go to Vegas.
Also, get yourselves tested for STD's per your physician's recommendations.
If he wasn't drinking or did this with some reasonable ability to think, completely disregarding your state, then you need to get some marital counseling ASAP.
2007-11-18 17:40:23
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answer #4
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answered by lady_phoenix39 6
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yup, ask for help after the fact instead of before it happened when u got so drunk, i'm sure you have never used the word "STOP"...ever think ur hubby may have gotten u that drunk so he could do what he did?...both of u have violated your marriage committment...what do u do now, u live with it and learn from it...what else do u wanna do?
2007-11-18 20:49:30
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answer #5
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answered by junkyarddogfan 6
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You may as well get over it, or end the marriage??? NO just get ove r it!!! You were involved alot more than you realized, afterall you agreed to it!!! rite or wrong, its done, get on with your life, and quit drinking to the point of not remembering what you id/didn't do!!
2007-11-18 19:08:03
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answer #6
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answered by happywjc 7
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He should put you up on a pedestal. If your having a threesome you should have rules and limits and do it together...Sounds like he treated you like crap got you drunk and had his fun!
2013-11-06 17:49:20
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answer #7
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answered by oneloyalbucki 2
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The bottom line is you should have both thought about the consequences before you did that!
2007-11-18 17:49:31
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answer #8
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answered by beamer 5
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next time order a man instead of a woman, see how he likes that! whats done is done. say everything u need to say to him and move on or leave
2007-11-18 18:59:00
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answer #9
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answered by dr phil 1
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You were foolish, and your husband took advantage of your state to have sex with another woman. You both need to stop drinking if you cannot control it.
2007-11-18 17:40:11
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answer #10
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answered by Johanna 4
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