If You Are Single, How Do You Cope During the Holidays?

Question

Let me hear how you make it special for yourself :-) It can be doubly hard for us seniors!

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http://msn.match.com/msn/article.aspx?articleid=8789&TrackingID=516311&BannerID=544657&menuid=7>1=10582

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For me, it's not TOO bad, as my kids and grands are around...although Christmas Eve is sometimes hard for me as the rituals I used to enjoy are now done by others and I cannot always join them.

Decorating my home is something I force myself to do to create a mood :-)

Answer 1

I'm lucky to have nieces and nephews who love me and make a point of visiting, especially around holiday time (my sibs did an excellent job of parenting). I also have friends who are my family--that is, we make sure we all have someone(s) to celebrate the holidays with. If there are a bunch of us without anywhere to go or people to be with, we do our own "family" party (it's just like you would with your family but with people who you are not related to). And one of the good things about this is that we are all close to the same age and remember the same music, dances, fashions, historical points during out lifetimes. I usually ask the more movie-buff friends to put their heads together and choose a couple of movies (DVDs) to rent/buy so we can put them on the tv if anyone wants to sit and watch. We usually all go out and take a stroll after eating the main meal (just to get outside for a short while, some of them have diabetes and need to walk off some of their intake, to get the ol' circulation going again, but mostly just because it's nice to be with a bunch of friends just walking around, shops are closed, streets tend to be empty and someone inevitably dances in the street just 'cause she can). And everyone goes home with leftovers to eat for another day or more. The gang is ever changing--we bring friends and associates who have nowhere else to go, some friends move away or have other things to do this time around, etc. And some of us volunteer at one of the local charities serving up turkey dinners to those less fortunate. The holidays are what you make them be--you can start your own traditions, doesn't necessarily have to be with blood relatives.

Answer 2

This will be my second Christmas since my divorce and the death of my mother. Honestly last year I didn't think I would make it through both seasons Thanksgiving and Christmas. On top of that I had just moved into my mothers house. I still had stuff packed because I had broken my ankle in Nov trying to move. I guess it was the week before Christmas that I finally went out and bought a small pre-lit tree and I surrounded it with things I had kept from past Christmas's. I had a small dinner with my brother on Christmas day. That was last year, this is another year and a new challenge. Maybe I will find some good suggestions from other folks here.

Answer 3

If you are not a member of a singles organization through your church or community- you might want to look into finding one. Sharing the holidays makes it more special for them too!
If that's not something you want to do- I say go the "service" route! Volunteer at the community homeless center- help serve Thanksgiving dinner there! Get to know your neighbors, perhaps you could babysit allowing them to get their Christmas shopping done.
As a single adult- I still loved the holiday but found it lonely. Not putting up a tree and avoiding holiday specials only made it worse for me. Celebrate the day in your own cultural way (attend mass- or whatever) It won't go away. You just as well enjoy it.
I wish you well. Hope you find a beautiful way to enjoy not endure the holidays this year.

Answer 4

I try and think about people who are even worse off. For instance on Thanksgiving I am going to an assisted living center in the evening and playing games for a few hours. Besides the elderly who are alone at the holidays there are always the homeless, military, kids in hospitals, kids in shelters, families in shelters etc. I always feel better about my situation when I can help some of these others.

Answer 5

It's easier for me as I've gotten older. I've become more resourceful and more realistic. This Thanksgiving I'm flying to Laughlin to be with friends who are motor homing there.
For Christmas I'm going to my son's in Myrtle Beach, SC. In the past I have also had Christmas eve dinner out with one or more single friends or couples that I know. I've also had dinner at friends homes with their family. These are folks I know well so I feel included and at home. For Christmas day, usually someone invites me for dinner with their family. When my family isn't available I just adopt one! I'm willing to let folks know I'm going to be alone and be a bit vulnerable. It's a risk that is worth taking.
I decorate but not as much as I used to. I use my favorite decorations. Something fairly easy to get up and take down and that I love.
I've changed my expectations and found new ways to enjoy the holiday season.

Answer 6

Well for one thing, I don't decorate my house as it is to small to do that (8 X 30) and nobody ever comes over anyway except for my daughter. So I don't see any point in decorating it.

I do cook a Christmas dinner for my parents and I. If any family members come over they are invited to stay and join us.

Other than that, I just stay home and do nothing except play on the computer or watch Christmas movies on TV.

Answer 7

Will since my mother and I share a house, I am not completely alone. I do have a sister and we go to her house for Thanksgiving and Christmas. We also get together with my nephew and his wife, along with my son and his girlfriend. So I haven't felt like I am coping yet. And I still decorate because I just love to do it. I also attend my Church functions. Still, it would be nice to have a significant other. It could happen.

Answer 8

I try to ignore Christmas. I stay home and do what I always do. This year I hope to make myself go out and do something. There not much to do here except go the casinos and I don't want to do that. Maybe I'll think of something. Maybe I'll be right here on answers!

Answer 9

When I was single I volunteered to work. Always so many people that wanted the day off to spend with family and I enjoyed being around people rather than all alone at home.

Answer 10

To me it's just another day, and a lot of times i have to work as they don't shut down for most holidays ( America is really becoming a greedy nation ). Also i do a lot of deer hunting during holidays like Thanksgiving and Christmas.