i really want to stop this fornification and masturbation business. HELP?

Question

help. im a 17yr old male. I cant stop fornificating and masturbating. After every 1 day break, or every 2 days like a wearwolf engulfs me. I had a normal upbringing, with no illegitiamate background so far. I live in a nurturing home as well.

Its like i cant stop. I want to but it has a vice like grip on me. to top it off; ive finished school in my country, and the university only opens in feb. I tried hard looking for a job, but havent found one.

I joined an athletics club, I train for the 1500m event.

I need to stop. I have to stop. Ive tried for the past yr, where this masturbation problem just engulfed me with some video that a friend sent me when i was 16.

Please advise. I dont have a girlfriend; and anyway masturbation is based on the mind and lust not love/relationships.

I feel that masturbation is gonna end me.

HELP.

Answer 1

I love how no one answers the question dude is asking. There is plenty out there saying masturbation is fine, that I'm sure he has read. Regardless he wants to stop and is asking how. If y'all can answer his question great otherwise how about turning off your noise.

With a big libido myself and no woman, I've stopped masturbating, basically its 3 things for me: Awareness, surrender, & reward. I worked on my Awareness of what was going on with me generally & w/ sex triggers in particular, because unless you know what is happening how can you do anything about it. In my case I even got some counseling called dialectical behavior therapy, generally used to treat something unrelated but has a great awareness skills component.

Once I'm aware I'm getting the itch, I Surrender or let go of my desire to scratch it. Lookup "SA white book", there are some chapters at the beginning that have good stuff though much of the rest of the book probably only good if you really are a sex addict.

Then last is Reward, I give myself something every so often as I stay away from it. Not just token little things, things I really want. If I masturbate, I dont give the whatever to myself.

No question it can be really tough to stop but it is possible.

Answer 2

This all started when you watched that video. It is a mental thing just not a freaky thing. By watching that video you peaked your curiosity about sex and your body started having the desire to have sex.

So it is coming from your brain but now that you've started masturbating it will be hard to stop as you already said. Try doing it less times for the day, just once less initially. Then gradually increase the number of times you do it less. See if that works. But don't rush it, give yourself time. You've been doing it for a while now and it will be hard to just stop.

Remember if you do it for longer it might hurt you with a partner in the long run. In as much as it is healthy, doing it for too long too many times is not healthy. You might end up not being able to have an orgasm unless you get a hand job from your partner and that can hurt a relationship if you really like this person. Give yourself time and try to do it less and less every month for instance. Good luck!

Answer 3

Mate. I don't know if you're religious, it's sounds like you are, because there is no rational, factual argument against masturbation and I had always thought that people had stopped perpetuating myths about how masturbation was harmful, but apparently people still say that stuff.

It is a perfectly healthy outlet of sexual tension, it's perfectly normal and commonplace for men and women to masturbate once a day or more.

It doesn't cause any medical problems at all. It only might become a problem if you masturbate so frequently that it starts to interfere with your life, that is to say, you would choose to stay home and masturbate rather than go to school or work. If you're masturbating a couple of times a day when the need strikes you, and it's not interfering with your life, it shouldn't be an issue, unless I'm missing something.

If you're still unsure, feel free to email me via my profile, but I hope this alleviates some of your fears.

Answer 4

If you don't have a sexual partner then you can't really be fornicating - that requires at least two! As for the masturbation, don't worry about it. You're 17. Most 17 year old boys spend a great deal of time wanking - its a normal healthy part of development. Its utterly harmless. You wont go blind, or mad, or grow hairs on your palms. Once you start Uni, you will undoubtedly find a girlfriend, or several girlfriends. You will hopefully find that your masturbation will have helped teach you to hold back and not come too early and once you get regular sexual partners, you probably wont need to do it quite as often!!

Answer 5

You didn't say why you need, or have, to stop masturbating. If you don't feel well and get physically sick after masturbation, then that's a good reason why you should tell yourself to stop. It should be easy because, as you have realized, masturbating is based in the mind, i.e., you only have to control your mind.

Answer 6

Masturbation is actually a healthy and normal activity.
You seem to think that it's a calamity that has beset you, but I think it's just a normal young man's hormones.
Unless the frequency is outrageous or there is an accompanying addiction to pornography, you shouldn't be worried about masturbating.
The fact is that once a male reaches puberty, his body makes fluids that need to be eliminated from time to time. Sexual intercourse does accomplish this but for young , single men like yourself the fluids can accumulate and actually cause sexual dysfunction later in life.
If it makes you feel any better most people masturbate.

Answer 7

You should be forgetting how many times a week you masturbate, some guys normal for them your age is a couple a day. you are at the peak of your male hormone output and you could do it as often as you like , 4 ,5 times a day or even more. and it is actually good for you if it relieves the stress you have now from fighting with yourself over it.

Answer 8

Masturbation is very healthy for men. It helps prevent prostate cancer in later life. It is also fun.
Why do you think you want/need to stop masturbating? Unless it it taking up so much of your time it's keeping you from finding a job for college, there's nothing wrong with it.

Answer 9

well at such a young age its hard to control your sexual feelings especially if you are a guy....i really dont feel like you should feel bad or worried about your habbits many men do it as often as you do ....it is perfectly healthy...

what you need to find out is what exactly happens before you masterbate...as in what causes you to cause there is always a triggger...maybe when you find the trigger you could solve the problem

then again if this problem really does persist you shook seek some medical advise so you couldcheck out your hormone levels

Answer 10

If you really want to stop then get a hobby and then when the hobby finishes go to sleep, if you feel you're going to want to masturbate then think of something disgusting, if you're freind overs you some kind of movie say your mobile phone has no memory or your pc won't accept files.

Just think of disgusting stuff and keep occupied. Honestly though, why would you want to stop? It's perfectly normal and in some cases healthy and alot of males do it.