About 18 months ago my brother was murdered by his wife, who is now incarerated. My retired parents took on the task of raising the five children. It has been realy hard on the entire family, but I think most difficult for my mother. My parents who lived with my wife and I moved into my brothers house too care for the children. We were hoping not too uproot the kids from their already familuar routines and backrounds, we felt this would only further tramatize the children. There are five children ages 6 to 17. Recently I had suggested that the time has come to sell both my home and my brothers home so that we could all move in together. My parents are not getting any younger and its been very trying for them. When I mentioned this too the kids two began crying intensely, which broke my heart. I don't know if I'm doing more damage than help. My wife and I do not wish too move to my brothers home in the city. Just don't know what else too do?
2007-11-17 21:46:15 · 4 answers · asked by paul g 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The kids will adjust, and a "house" is not a home, it's love and family togetherness that makes a home. the kids will be better off in the long run, as will your parents, in a new place that's large enough to accomodate everyone. The kids want to cling to something that isn't in the house itself, so do what's going to benefit everyone and it will all work out. Good luck, and I am so sorry for the loss of your brother.
2007-11-17 21:52:28 · answer #1 · answered by Squirrley Temple 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow,I am so sorry for your loss.
Is the City home in a bad area? Would it benefit everyone to live together?
Have you considered moving next to your folks?
Where is your parents house?
I am too private a person to live with so many people. I would help the family but with going to their place and helping.
I wish you all the luck in the world. Have your parents voiced an opinion either way?
2007-11-17 21:53:53 · answer #2 · answered by b14417@sbcglobal.net 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How about moving to a home near your brother's home, so you can help out more? Or how about going there on weekends and relieving your parents, so it's not as much work? Also, are these kids getting counseling? It's got to be terrible for them, and professional grief counseling can help.
2007-11-17 21:50:24 · answer #3 · answered by Katherine W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh wow im very sorry for your loss... yes it may be hard on the kids but your parents are retired and they need help... i find it very comendable that you and your wife want to get a different house (understandable why you wouldnt want to live in your brothers house) to help with the responsibilty... talk with your parents and see what they think... let the kids that its not going to happen over night and that grammy and grampy do need help... it will eventually get better... all the best to you
2007-11-17 21:54:06 · answer #4 · answered by Skylar1983 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋