cheating partner?

Question

would you accept a cheating partner again?
some do have relevant and reasonable explaination of their infidelity..really

would you shut your ears and tell them off, or accept their mistake and work things out together again..

do share your stories.. it'll help others too

Answer 1

Hello,

This whole situation is very personal, not that anyone will accept a cheating partner however at times we have to take it and move on. A cheating partner will not change his ways...it is always a good excuse and very valid...but once the glass is broken, then its broken forever.

We lose trust and here goes the relationship. AT times the cheated on partner feels like the saviour, the hero and the one that will help the cheating partner out of a "bad behaviour" to he takes him back only to find out he can do nothing...and will start to have a very low self esteem and will lower its standards till he/she will realize, they can do better and move on.

Others will not take it and move on, and feel no matter what the excuse was, its only that "an excuse"...they will not put up with it. Also, for a partner to cheat, there must be reasons... look deeper into the relationship and try to separate yourself from it and see what is really going on...and is the partner lacking and why he went on his search venture...?....

Answer 2

It's hard to say with infidelity

I believe in forgiving people, but I also believe that there is a difference between forgiving, and TOLERATING bad behavior.

I won't lie to you, statistically, the majority of relationships with infidelity do not survive.

Very rarely, if both partners are exceptionally determined, selfless, patient, and forgiving, a relationship may actually improve after infidelity. This is because they no longer take each other for granted, and become more focused on commitment. On the other hand, I think a lot of couples never 100% recover from infidelity; or at least there will always be "something" missing in their relationship that they can never regain....

I think the basic difference between those who break up, and those that stay together is "remorse." Is your partner truly sorry and remorseful that he hurt you, and destroyed the valuable trust between you? Or is he only sorry that he made a mistake and *got caught*; that he had to deal with the consequences? The answer to this question is never easy.

If they were willing to accept responsibility, and do do whatever it takes to regain trust, then yes, I would take them back. But if they showed any ingenuiness, or denial, Then I wouldn't bother.....

Cheating is such an ugly, evil, and selfish thing to do, that many cheaters simply can't deal with it mentally or emotionally. They just aren't willing to comprehend that their actions could have caused so much suffering and destruction. So their only option is to rationalize it all away, to make excuses and exceptions for themselves.This is why cheaters tend to be repeat offenders; never able to learn from past mistakes... In a certain sense, this is an understandable human tendency. It takes a large amount of courage and personal integrity, to accept responsibility for cheating.

~W.O.M.B.A.T.

Answer 3

I would not take my husband back if he cheated on me. I respect myself more than that. I love my husband with every fiber of my being, but cheating is something that I would and could never tolerate and forgive. I feel as though when a love is strong and true there is no room for infidelity. When I was in highschool I dated the same guy. We were together for 5 years and he cheated on me constantly. Whenever I found out it was always how sorry he was and how much he loved me and did not want to lose me yet a couple months later there was another chic...this was a pattern.Anyway, this relationship was so harmful to me, my self esteem and my self worth. I was always wandering why I was not enough for him. Why he even needed anyone else when I was giving him my all. It made me feel that my all still wasn't enough. It gave me major trust issues and I held on to alot of resentment for many years following this relationship.(HE was too good looking for his own good and I hear he is going through his 4th divorce and has like 4 or 5 kids............REVENGE is SWEETER when you can sit back and watch the person destroy themselves and you do not have to lift a finger to get even...LOL!!! KARMA, Baby...KARMA)) I would never put myself through that again. If my husband needed another woman to satisfy him in any way then he doesn't deserve me because I know I am a beautiful, strong, smart and amazing woman. It would be his loss........not mine. I would hurt like hell, but I would never take him back. It is not even that I believe the old cliche of "once a cheater, always a cheater" because I don't and I do believe that people can change. I just love and respect myself enough to not tolerate having it done to me....AGAIN! Well....this is my 2 cents! LOL!

Answer 4

My hubby and i have been together for total 6 years, inclusive of our marriage 2.5 years. We've 2 daughters, 1 is about 5 years old, youngest one is 3. Throughout all these years, he has cheated on me countless times. Everytime i was the one who found out the affairs, we'd fought n quarrelled, mentioned divorce. But everytime he'd apologised and broke off with the 3rd party. Maybe was because of the kids that i forgave him. But a leopard will never change its spots. If its just 1 affair then maybe that person is worth forgiven, provided he does things to gain back that trust and love. But if that person cheats again then there's no point in forgiving him. Regardless of what reasons, there's no way a person to cheat on his/her partner. Its very hard to forgive and forget. One time hurt is already very deep, not to say 2nd or 3rd time.

Answer 5

I could not lower my standards enough to EVER want a cheater as a partner. I ALSO would never give a loaded gun to a murderer, give car keys to a drunk, or let a pedophile babysit my kids. I do not CARE what excuse they think they have for choosing to be what they are - I KNOW right from wrong, and "excusing" someone who personally does me wrong by letting them be close to me, would be foolish. MAYBE I could understand, but I would NEVER trust them again.

If a dog bites me, I do not go back and try to make friends with it. I go out of my way to avoid that dog. Yelling or telling the dog "OH, it's OK - I believe you just made a mistake" just puts me at risk for being bit all over again. No thank you.

Answer 6

I can't think of any good reasons for cheating. However, I also don't believe that people are perfect, that they don't fall from grace, and that they don't make terrible mistakes that hurt a lot of people. My husband and I have been there and done that together in our marriage. Healing takes a long, long time, lots of patience, open and vulnerable communication, and ongoing honesty and faithfulness; proof everyday that everything is going to be all right by the things that are said and done and the effort put forth in healing together. Take it from me, it can work and if you love each other you'll grow from this and be stronger for it. Married 32 years and so glad we worked and continue to work on our marriage.

Answer 7

Everyone is different.We all have differing ideas and morals,when it comes to relationships.lf one partner is very trusting and loyal to the other,then l would find it very very difficult to accept back into my life a cheating partner.But having said that,l have friends who have been down that road and they have recovered from their partners infidelety.l guess it depends on the individual and maybe how strong the love they have for the other person is.

Answer 8

A long term relationship will have highs and lows, it is hard work getting though the lows and many people don't want to do the work. Sometimes infidelity occurs in a relationship, that is a very low point. It is also a very personal decision concerning your ability to forgive someone when they have abused your trust, but it is not always a deal breaker. We are all just human and have our failings after all.

Answer 9

Once a cheater, always a cheater.

If you are willing to put up with that and be quiet about it, welcome him with open arms. If you think you are worth more than that, find a real man to take care of you. Not all men cheat, just the losers.

Answer 10

I did accept my cheating partner again and you know what?
He cheated on me AGAIN! also nothing changed! hes still the same jerk that wanted me for sex! Good thing tho I never had sex with him! muhahaha. lol anyways The only reason why I took him back was b/c he was crying and told me he changed but he didnt this time he abused me, and cheated on me. he never got over his exs either! so I broke up with him and now I am having the best time ever! being single rocks! if he ever asks for me to come back I'll simply say "go f*** yourself!" lol dont call me mean cause this has been going on for over 3 years!!!