soon to be ex husband has a live in girlfriend that has her children taken away from her by CPS, I do not have the full story I just know that it was from neglect. How do I insure that my child cannot and will not be able to be left alone with her, even though she will not be named in the divorce, can i still legally require them to have supervised visitation?
2007-11-17 15:34:55 · 10 answers · asked by Shelbi R 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
that needs to be brought up in mediation.
2007-11-17 15:45:24 · answer #1 · answered by nodumgys 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, do get the full story. Someone may have told you this or that, but you need to find out the truth before you start restricting a parent from their child.
You can leave your son in the care and custody of his father and let him decide what's best. That is what happens when a parent has custody. If your ex-husband is an unfit parent or has poor judgement then you might want to consider that in your divorce proceeding.
2007-11-17 15:51:45 · answer #2 · answered by ∞ sky3000 ∞ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old is your daughter? If she is 11 or over, she should be able to get by when visiting her dad. She's old enough to have the wit to tell the gf to shove off, if she needs to. If she is 10 or younger, certainly talk to a lawyer about what you can do. With or without a lawyer, you can tell your stb ex that if your daughter ever comes back worse for wear from Mother of the Year, you are holding him directly responsible. Make sure he understands that the duty is on him to protect your daughter, while she is there. You can also call her frequently while she is visiting, so that she and they know you are "watching".
2007-11-17 15:57:18 · answer #3 · answered by lighght30 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, in my decree, I did not have to let my daughter spend the night if my Ex's girlfriend was there. So, with her living there, I really did not have to make her go, but the first summer visitation that I had moved out of state (I left and have been 100 percent happy with this decision!) they got married so I could not keep her from going. He is an *** but his wwife has actually taken good care of my daughter. I would really bring it up in the divorce papers that you do tno want your child in the house overnight if there is a person of the opposite sex spending the night. =) ALso make sure that you play by all the rules and keep your word at all times. This means if you find out that she spent the night, you do not hand the kids over until he files suit against you in court. He will learn. YOu should find out form an attourney exactly what it is that you can do in your state. I did that in Wyoming, but that would not hold water here in CA. See what I mean?
2007-11-17 15:43:16 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You mentioned "soon to be ex" so I assume you have an attorney, I'd really consult him/her on this one if possible. Laws vary by state so what advice you give may be true in that person's state but may not for you. For example, if you have temporary custody while awaiting the final hearing in my state you can put it in the divorce decree that neither you nor your ex will be allowed any overnight visits with the opposite sex without the benefit of marriage...just remember once in writing this works both ways. You can't stop the kids from being around her or from her being at his house during the day but you can stop overnight visits while the kids are with him, if he refuses you have the right not to send the kids (but again that's in my state).
My Sister in law just went through almost the exact same situtation with her ex's new wife. The woman had attempted suicide while left alone with the kid (my nephew) and believe it or not the courts did not do a thing other than waste my sister in laws time and money. The woman is in counseling and I guess the courts felt that was good enough. So you can never say with any certainty how the situation will turn out, but you need to do what is in the best interest of your children.
2007-11-17 15:47:34 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless you can prove to the courts that she's been neglectful or abusive to YOUR child, there's nothing you can do about it. And if you try, the courts will think you're trying to alienate him as a parent. Just keep your eyes peeled for any signs of mistreatment.
2007-11-17 15:44:23 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You can not require your children's FATHER tohave supervised visitaion because he has nothing to do with his girlfriend's neglet of HER children. His girlfriend is not going to be part of the custody order of YOUR children. YOUR children's father doesn't neglect HIS children you have no legal reason to demand superivised visitations.
2007-11-17 19:10:41 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can state in your custody agreement that neither one of you can leave the children with an adult that the other parent does not agree to. It has to work both ways. You can state your concerns to your lawyer and see if there is a way to bring it before the judge in court.
It is a tough and fearful thing to let your child go for visitation when you know there is a possibility of neglect. My situation was one that I had to wait for a bad thing to happen, then take him back to court for revised custody. I called, visited, had his family visit all during his time with the kids! They are all old enough now to call me if there is an uncomfortable situation and know I will come for them. And their dad knows this too!
My positive thoughts go out to you for the safety and well being of your child.
2007-11-17 15:49:31 · answer #8 · answered by dizzkat 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is so hard when parents divorce. Seems to me that you should be able to do this. Have you tried talking to the dad first? Talk to your lawyer, they can help on this matter.
2007-11-17 15:45:16 · answer #9 · answered by T I 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
very much you can. my opion/
2007-11-17 15:39:42 · answer #10 · answered by the_silverfoxx 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋