They both deny any romantic involvement, but 16 years ago, just as I became engaged to my now wife, her partner took her for a short walk in the woods outside of their office to tell her that for long he had entertained fantasies of their being together one day . Her birthday gift to him in 2006 was a new pen. His thank you email said: " now I can take a little piece of you along with me on business trips;" signed with the closing, "Love...."
2007-11-17 01:38:11 · 21 answers · asked by John 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well 16 years ago she must have told you about the walk in the woods. She wasn't hiding it which was a good sign. I don't think a pen is a romantic gift.
A Lot of people sign there letters with Love. But in this case since he has expressed that he had feeling for her she should probably be a little more careful on wording. He could have all the feelings he wants but she could still be faithful to you. Obviously you have seen the notes and cards to read the Love at the end. Were these notes business related? I would sit down with her and tell her that this relationship makes you uncomfortable. If you are worrying now and you keep it to yourself the jealousy will just get worse
and hurt your marriage. It might not be anything but she should keep it a professional relationship if he still has feelings for her. Is this man married ? He told her 16 years ago before you got married as a last effort to win her. She married you. You are still married. That says something. Just talk to her. But always keep your eyes and ears open. Keep your marriage a happy one. Good Luck
2007-11-17 01:54:07 · answer #1 · answered by smile4u 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
His reply is a bit close to the mark, I would say, for just a friendly message, but as long as it is just a bit of harmless flirting, it's ok. You need to ask yourself if you trust your wife. Are you giving her enough love and affection, so that the words of another man wont tempt her away?
As long as you trust her, don't make an issue of this. She's clearly known this guy a long time, and there may have been romantic issues years ago before the two of you married. Fact is, she's married to you now. You must have faith in her, or else you will drive her away.
2007-11-17 09:57:27 · answer #2 · answered by helly 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would be a little concerned. After all he admitted to having sexual fantasies about her and him. And the love thing all the time? I have male friends and i never say that, but some are different maybe it's just me. Best of luck to you
2007-11-17 09:48:22 · answer #3 · answered by sweetemtation_123 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i wouldn't be too concerned with your wife as you didn't leave any examples of her notes but her partner seems a little off. sometimes people take kindness as an advance, my husband had a problem like this when he was nice and polite to an employee and then everytime she would text him a note it was signed love***, though he didn't encourage her at all.
2007-11-17 10:16:22 · answer #4 · answered by paula t. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't turn a blind eye to this but if all you have is what "love" in a closing then you shouldn't jump to conclusions. In the meantime, you should make sure the heat is turned up in your relationship and that there isn't anything going on that might draw her to her partner. BTW, have you met him? Maybe you should.
2007-11-17 09:43:29 · answer #5 · answered by Amy K 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Funny, this February I will be celebrating my sixteen year wedding anniversary to my husband also!
Yes, you should be concerned, I would address this issue with her immediately, why? Well about eight years ago, a woman that my husband worked with, her dog died, and my husband felt so bad he bought her flowers and a card and signed only his name, to the card, he did not want me to sign my name!!!
He did not see anything wrong with it, but I did, we were having marital problems also, so when worse came to worse and he still gave her the card and flowers, and our marriage was getting real bad, because she was breaking up our marriage, I took my daughter and left him!!!!
It took him eight months to a year to crawl back to me and boy did I let him suffer, remind you, on top of this, we had many other problems also, and when I finally let him back into my life, and away from her, we live way up state now, he changed and now he is totally devoted to me and my daughter, I would not take him back until he changed.
Now I have to get on him about help with the house cleaning! LOL!!!! (From another question I answered) :) !!!
2007-11-17 09:58:10 · answer #6 · answered by carriegreen13 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
This thing of signing " love",.. it just doesn't seem right, that stay in the family and for you, it sounds like a mixed message she is sending
2007-11-17 10:13:27 · answer #7 · answered by kim t 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
does not like a normal exchange between friends but I would have faith in my wife. Tell her its bothering you. She has a duty to listen and take heed to what you are saying.
2007-11-17 09:53:25 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
she might not think it is what it is sometime women do see what we see and the same n reverse.
but i would check that and if she make a fuss let her know your not comfortable with it and if it's a problem than we need to talk about what to do but...HE HAS TO GO
2007-11-17 13:44:19 · answer #9 · answered by sunrisedrifter 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why be concerned now? He's probablly has been banging her siince before you married her, aand if you beleive both of them in denyng not doing it. Man it's time to wake up. She'll be with him not long from now unless you let her have the best of two worlds. Sorry Man, but it is what it is.
2007-11-17 09:44:44 · answer #10 · answered by seahorse 4 · 2⤊ 3⤋