We have a seven year old son. He spends most of his time playing video games and goes to strip clubs on the weekend? I know it sounds like I should just up and leave but because we have a son its hard. Help!
2007-11-16 16:35:26 · 16 answers · asked by sexyangelkiss26 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
i would put a stop to the strip clubs first and then i would take a long hard look at youre life and youre sons life would you wont him to grow up and sponge off a woman and go to strip clubs and feel like he doesnt have to work or do anything in life exept live off of a woman because his momma is letting his dad do that i know you love him but he has to grow up and get a j0b and take care of buisiness at home like a man you need to talk to him about all of this and let him know youre not putting up with this no more its time for him to pull his weight around the house good luck
2007-11-16 16:46:48 · answer #1 · answered by lil momma 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
So where is he getting the money for strip clubs and video games if he doesn't work? The money has to be coming from you. You have got to cut him off completely from money.You are letting him run all over you. You say you don't want to leave because of your son, but do you want him growing up with your boyfriend influencing him in that way? You are making the money, so making it on your pwn shouldn't be to hard. The money that went to strip clubs and video games could pay for child care if needed. You don't deserve to have someone like this in your life.
2007-11-17 01:19:23 · answer #2 · answered by bluemonarch17 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why do people constantly use their child as an excuse not to leave a man? I don't understand. In the old days, women had very little opportunities and weren't encouraged to have careers or make their own money. Now, women have these things and can take care of themselves. It was more understandable back then that women often stayed in less than steller marriages for the kids because, let's face it, they would not have had the financial means to take care of them. But today, that's not true. What's worse? For you to leave and your son to have to eat more pb&j sandwiches than he does now in order to save money or that he grow up with a deadbeat father who is a HORRIBLE example of a father, a man, and a partner. You realize he's just watching all of that and will end up just like him, right? Don't you want your son to be more than that? What is he teaching your son? Certainly not the importance of hard work - that's for sure! Self discipline? Nope. Respect for yourself? Not that either. Treating the person you love with respect or kindness? Nope. That lazy guy you call a "boyfriend" is a loser who can't finish anything - hell, he's dated you for 10 years and can't even do that properly.
2007-11-17 00:44:09 · answer #3 · answered by bestadvicechick 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I believe broken families are probably the biggest problem in our country...but in your case it would seem your son might grow up to be like his father if you allow this to continue or worse he may lose respect for you. Get him to the doctor for a psych evaluation. If he really loved you he would never let you work so hard, while he is out partying at the strip club. I say "kick him out"! If he chooses to grow up...you can take him back. Someone like that will usually just find some other woman to support him. Your son doesn't need a role model like that!
2007-11-17 01:32:14 · answer #4 · answered by QuantumB 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can not imagine why you put up with this . You have put up with it for ten years so what marketable skills do you think he has now? If you want to support this guy the rest of your life you are well on your way. The sad part is that you have already probably given your son the blueprint for his own life. Cut the money off, play time is over.
2007-11-17 00:49:16 · answer #5 · answered by Mama Mia 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You said it, you have a son..Do you want your son to grow up thiinking that this is acceptable behavior for a man? I would hope not! You have been the one paying everything so you need to boot his sorry tail out. One question...If he doesn't work...how is he going to stripclubs? I think that maybe you are afraid of lkicking him out, but do you think it's gonna get better? Can you see your life like this forever? Did you say that he is great? Yeah, he sounds like a fine catch to me!
2007-11-17 01:33:05 · answer #6 · answered by bella s 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why should he work? You enable him to be a bum so he is. If you are tired of supporting him, save your money and get out....simple as that. Just because you leave, doesn't mean he will never see your son again. Without your paycheck, he is either going to have to go on the public dole, or...novel idea.......GET A JOB.
2007-11-17 00:44:43 · answer #7 · answered by Lisa W 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If the threat of leaving is what gets him off his butt, then it looks like that's a threat you'll have to use. Doesn't sound like any way to live, in my opinion.
Talk to him. Try to get this resolved with a calm, understanding, but assertive attitude. Do whatever makes sense. Try a few things. Consider counseling. Then resort to leaving if you're desperate.
2007-11-17 00:40:12 · answer #8 · answered by Buying is Voting 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It took you 10 years to figure him out? and you had a kid with him on top of it? Wow, you must be desperate? Sorry i don;t mean to be rude, but i am just direct and honest, that's just me. Now really it is up to you, but in all honesty once again, you are going to put a child through hell just because you couldn't see the obvious ... couldn't or didn't want to see the obvious.
2007-11-17 01:32:31 · answer #9 · answered by caliguy_30 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do you enable him? For example, are you getting him Madden 2008 for Xmas?
I had a lazy dad like that who rarely worked. It was better when he left. A son needs a positive role model.
2007-11-17 00:43:55 · answer #10 · answered by Kyle W 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋