For 13 yrs I chased this guy..it was love at first sight for me..when I hit 21 a "certain kind of relationship" started with him.I am 24 ..for the past 2 yrs I have been the girl who he always knew would be right there waiting for him..5 days ago he said he wanted space and I said okay even thought he knows i love and am inlove with him and that I would wait for him to find out w.hat he wanted..he still wanted to have a break..he felt pressured.. he asked me too what if i changed my mind and I said don't because this is what you need. he said he didn't want to lose me its just he wasn't ready for me in life right now..hes 30..I am 25..I said ok and afterwards we stopped talking,writing ect. 5 days there were no calls,or letters or nothing..we are 3 hrs apart by the way..he writes me today and says he can't do it..and not being able to hear my voice is killing him..he said he hates this and doesn't understand why its all or nothing..am I wrong if I dont write back?If i do..when?
2007-11-16 14:04:57 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I should also add that he never knew what he wanted between me and him so we have never dated.
2007-11-16 14:05:12 · update #1
So... you were in a relationship with him but he didn't know what he wanted until now?? I'm a little confused. It's either a relationship or it isn't. Write him back if you want, just make sure you don't become the girl who's always waiting for him to figure out what he wants because in the mean time your life is passing by. And if you are always focused on waiting for him...you might miss something that's right in front of you at some point.
2007-11-16 14:24:24 · answer #1 · answered by ladybug 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Okay, so he didn't know what he wanted 13 years ago and he still doesn't know at age 30?! I'd get rid of him. You deserve better. I think you've given him enough of your precious time. He doesn't seem to want to be with you very much. I'd write him one last time to let him know you are moving on and to stop writing. Don't be a fool for this guy anymore. He made his decision. Trust me, if he wants to change things, he can make an effort to make things work with you guys. But make sure to make him really work for it. If he knows he can walk all over you, he will do it as long as he wants. Good luck!
2007-11-16 22:11:38 · answer #2 · answered by sun day 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I am a guy who has done this myself. I didn't even realize I was like this until it was too late. You need to run in the other direction. All he is doing is trying to control the situation and you. He knows you will always be there. He can go do what ever he wants and when he gets done you will be there. Do yourself a favor and stop talking to him.
2007-11-16 22:13:17 · answer #3 · answered by George N 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
sounds to me like hes playing you. He needs his space when hes with another woman and then when that doesnt work out he knows that your waiting for him. 13 years is a long time to wait for a man. Stop waisting your time on this guy.
2007-11-16 22:15:26 · answer #4 · answered by beanodom 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Wow, you're sort of pathetic aren't you? Do you pride yourself in being his back up plan? That's what you are. The girl who will always be right there waiting for him when all his other relationships fail and if he gets desperate enough...Don't you think you deserve better than being some guys back up plan?
2007-11-16 22:12:57 · answer #5 · answered by some female 5 · 2⤊ 2⤋
You will not be wrong for not writing him. You need to start dating and stop waiting for him. Life is short but comes fast. It sounds like he have two women and can not choose one.
2007-11-16 22:12:40 · answer #6 · answered by Grimey 3 · 3⤊ 2⤋
sounds like he's taking you for granted. you can't spend your life waiting and chasing a man. that gets old. you want someone who will love you by their actions and words.
2007-11-16 22:15:56 · answer #7 · answered by Kiki 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
13 years? whats up with you lady, there is no such thing as "love at first sight" sorry im assuming this guy is just really really hot and you willing to run for him everytime and going through all the game he plays. dont be so shallow if thtats the case
2007-11-16 22:09:20 · answer #8 · answered by djmixah7 3 · 2⤊ 3⤋
Enough already, move on or prepare to die a lonely woman.
2007-11-16 22:18:52 · answer #9 · answered by The Voice of Reason 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You really need to move on.
After 13 years if he isn't ready to be with you he never will be.
2007-11-16 22:13:16 · answer #10 · answered by looneybin90 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋