My husband and I have been married a little over a year. Before we got married we both had bachelor/bachelorette parties.
We talked about what we both would be doing. We agreed that both of us would not go to a strip club. We both wanted to respect our relationship and made a decision together. Neither of us had never been to one and I at least had no desire to go to one.
I had my party had lots of clean fun and did not go to a strip club. The following weekend my husband had one and he and his friends went to a strip club. To this day this annoys me to no end. We made a decision as a couple to respect each other and he didn't. I know guys go to strip clubs all the time...and honestly I would not care if he wanted to go to one and we went together. but the fact is he didn't respect our decision as a couple. .I still have some resentment over this situation. How do I move past this??
Serious answers only please
2007-11-16 08:51:50 · 10 answers · asked by Sara 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Thanks for the honest answers...this has helped me a lot =)
2007-11-16 09:52:51 · update #1
If it's such a big deal why did you marry him? You need to get over yourself if this is the only problem you guys have drop it it's not worth the turmoil it's causing in your marriage if you don't trust him leave sounds like you're making up reasons to..
2007-11-16 09:01:57 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honey, resentment is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.
It is making you sick with all kinds of uneasiness and you need to rid your self of it.
Sit down with him and tell him how this made you feel, then tell him you love him and forgive him. Hopefully he'll apoligize. But if not, forgive him anyway!
Now that you have forgiven him, do not pick up that burden again. You're free from it. Don't let it interupt your marriage, and keep you feeling like this another day. You deserve to give yourself a break, and to have a good life.
Good luck.
2007-11-16 12:32:44 · answer #2 · answered by latebreakfast 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him that this still bothers you and that he didnt respect your desicion that the both of you made, and tell him its not that he went to the strip club its other things like him not respecting the decision before hand
2007-11-16 09:13:32 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's normal for guys to go to strip vlubs for their bachelor party. His best man obviously wanted to take him to a strip club cuz that's what guys do. It's not that big of a deal...
2007-11-16 09:01:26 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
I'm sorry! But in his defense - he was probably pushed by his friends!!! My hubby's friends kept asking and asking and asking as well ... its a guy thing... you know how they are!
Really try to get past it - I bet that his friends just wouldn't let up and considering they were probably all drinking...?!? At least he told you and was honest about the fact he went - give him credit for that!!!
2007-11-16 09:00:01 · answer #5 · answered by Me 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Does he know how much this bothers you still? The most he can do now, a year later is apologize. After that, you need to bury it and not dig it back up...
2007-11-16 08:57:26 · answer #6 · answered by sunflowergal 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Realize, that it could have been worse. They could have hired a private stripper/hooker to give him a happy ending.
And I'm being serious, the best way to get past something is to realize that it could have been worse than what it was.
Also, acknowledging that whats done is done.
2007-11-16 09:00:00 · answer #7 · answered by gypsy g 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Ask him why he felt the need to disrespect your mutual decision before you even got married.
2007-11-16 08:55:54 · answer #8 · answered by Jody 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I agree with you...he made a promise to you...and he broke that promise....makes you wonder if any future promises that he makes will be honored....You need to forgive him and try to get past this...or it will cause your marriage to suffer....and if you can't get over it...perhaps you need to ask yourself if you did the right thing by marrying him...
2007-11-16 09:01:21 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
honestly, you'll have enough to deal with in" forever" don't sweat the small stuff, LET IT GO!!!
2007-11-16 09:57:22 · answer #10 · answered by Sheba 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋