Why do parents always say they're doing what's best for you when only you know what's best for you?

Question

Anyone got ideas?

Answer 1

Being the senior personthey think that they have the knowledge & the experience to guide us. Definitely,they are not always right. I,myself wanted to study BCA whuile my father forced me into English Hons. & I have ended into working with a Call-centre.

But truly speaking, some of the suggestion that they provide are truly helpful which they have gathered in years which we will also in the next couple of yrs to come.

Answer 2

I hate to says this but they are right. They do know what's best for u, believe it or not? They have been there b4 and done it. They do not want you to cross the same path, they believed you can do so much better. Take this from experienced. I hated my parents when i was young and in my teenage yrs. But as I got older I did appreciate them more and for things that they have done. From time to time I think back and thought I should have listen to my parents instead of being a stubborn kid. Now, I have a strong relationship with my mom and she's happy the way I had turned out but I know I could have done better if I had listened to her. Trust me, your parents only wants the best for you. Life is getting harder and harder, the friends u think u have, think twice. Parents will always be there no matter what u do. But friends can turn on you when u're least expected.

Answer 3

It is tough being a kid/teen, but parents have the responsibility to help you to become a productive and respectable adult.

In your youth, you often think you know what is best for yourself, but your vision is limited. You are not thinking about the consequences of what you do, like a year from now, or what mark it could make on your reputation, creating difficulties later on in life.

I know that being harped at to clean your room can really be a downer. But the basics of it are not so much that your room should be perfect, it is more that, later in life you need to have already created the fundamental habit of being organized. Keeping a room clean helps to build that good habit. Things like this are what parents see as being best for you. They are trying to shape and form a more solid adulthood for you.

Suppose you wanted to go and party with friends till 2 am. You know as well as your parents, that this is a real reputation destoying thing, when kids suddenly get ideas to go elsewhere, or steal a car, or have sex. The results of this can be a real life altering experience. Your parents don't want you to be involved in the temptations that can lead you down the wrong path.

Being a parent is really tough too, especially when the kids rebel, get upset, have screaming matches. Try to sit back and think about what your actions might end up resulting in.

Parents do know what is good for you. They may have been little hellions as teens themselves, and really don't want to see you make the same really dumb mistakes.

Answer 4

That's a great question, and here's the answer. It comes in 2 parts.

Part 1: If you're a child, your parents have more experience being a child than you do. If you're a teen, they have more experience being a teen that you do.

In fact, every person who lived to be over 20 was a teen as long as you're allowed to. As if that wasn't enough, they then lived to see the consequences of the choices they made as a teen.

If you look at this rationally, it's obvious that they're more qualified to live your life than you are. But you don't look at it rationally, do you? That brings me to part 2:

Part 2: For thousands of years, it's been obvious that human babies are born with helplessly underdeveloped brains. They are the most helpless baby organism born this planet. By the time they're teenagers, their brains are more developed, but there's something funny about them. It's also evident for thousands of years that teenage brains don't work properly, but it's a lot harder to understand why. Only recently, scientists have been able to identify certain specific areas of the brain that don't develop properly until you're 25.

So - You are able to think you know more than your parents (in spite of all the evidence to the contrary) because your brain doesn't work properly.

Insurance companies have known this for many years, because driving cars makes this evident. As you may know, your car insurance plummets in price when you reach 25. This is because that's the age that your brain starts working correctly.

After that, I'm sorry to say, it's all downhill!

And that's the answer to your question.

Answer 5

People don't always know what's best for themselves. Case in point, addicts (cigarettes, alcohol, harder drugs, shopping, etc).

Why parents are responsible for their children is because they have greater life experience; children (and yes, even teenagers) usually have a limited sense of the world, and are still learning what is appropriate, good, moral, and what is inappropriate, harmful, destructive.

This is also why parents at the end of their ropes usually wish for their children to have kids just like themselves, out of revenge... and the grownup kids see their own screwups, hangups, and limitations reflected in their kids' "You're not my boss" and "But whyyyyyyyy can't I, I waaaant it" (or "don't waaaaannna"), etc., once they've grown up and learned better themselves.

Granted, not all parents are good, and not even good parents are perfect. But they do as best they can and generally do know better than their kids (though most teenagers only realize this once they've hit their 20's -- ironic since most teenagers want to think they're grown up, but one of the first ways you can tell that someone HAS grown up is the maturity to acknowledge that your parents might be right!

Answer 6

Try to think of yourself as a parent. If you had a brother or sister much much younger than you.........aren't there times when you have to "look out" for them cause they don't realize whats going to happen if they continue to do whatever it is you might be preventing them from doing. And there usually pissed off too when you do that too them, even at such a young age. And if you still didn't understand that, how come theres babysitters........your parents are like babysitters only there doing this for 18 years. Maybe what they say and don't let you do is in your best interest.......personally I don't know you or your parents. "All" of us have asked this same thing growing up.....EVEN your own parents wondered the same thing too. Just remember something and you'll find this out for yourself some day when you've got your own kids. It's alot of responsibility and work raising kids, and parents just want the best for them and they want to save them the trouble and pain of going through stuff. And if you believe in them and what there telling you is more than likely the truth about something......well what can I tell ya........you either listen to them or you do whatever you think is best for you and it either will be or it won't be..........The difference is then you get to experience it if it wasn't something that was "best for you" then as they say, you've learned the hard way. And sometimes thats the only way too really learn something and grow as a person is to experience life and all that its about by just going through it the good and the bad stuff.

You've got all your life to do what you think will be best for you, whatever that's gonna be. And hopefully you'll have the sense to do most of it right.

Personally, I was very hard headed growing up. Very stubborn and very determined to do what I wanted to do.
I still have alot of that in me.........and there are many times in my life it went horribly wrong for me because I didn't listen to someone wiser.

Answer 7

Depending on how old you are, your parents MAY actually do know what's better for you. It may be a misconception for you to think you know better.

For example, a toddler may want to roam free (thinking roaming free is best for him). The parents on the other hand know of the danger of falling off the balcony and restricts the toddler from roaming in that area.

It is an extreme case, but you don't know the perspective of the parents and the wealth of knowledge they have until you are there, or you have experienced what they have.

Of course, that is only one side of the coin, and I am not denying there are cases where the parents are clueless. However, just answering your question...

Answer 8

It's called the wisdom of experience! But there are those decisions you have to make all by yourself- they can't hold your hand through them. At that point it is really important that you use your best wisdom. We've all seen rebellious teens who wish with all their hearts they had listened- the consequences of their decisions were so rough. We've seen wise teens who have stood up and with respect calmly explained why they desire something different, and asked for their parents blessing. If what you want puts you in a wise teens shoes. Give it a try, talk to them... don't yell, fight and argue- just talk.

If you realize what you want isn't that important and you are not showing much wisdom, lean on theirs just a little longer- some things are better missed out on. Let us know how it turns out. Ok?

Answer 9

As a parent we have expereinced thing in the world that children haven't experienced for the most part. Parents base their decisions on the knowledge and experiences they have been through and we all have said "but things are different now" but you know waht same stuff, different time. Basically a good parent says that to protect. Think about it.. parents can make mistakes in thinking what is right for you and they have been out there and have the bumps and bruises of life to prove it. How much greater could you who hasn't been out there make with no experience to go on. Tehy just want to spare you the pain they have been through. We all thought we knew what we were doing and thr truth is most time our parents were right. there is something to be said about experience.One word sums it up ...love.

Answer 10

That comment is a classic, and very natural response for a parent to give their child. The "best" to your parents and yourself, there is quite a difference in that respect. To be honest, I think when a parent says that, the way they should put it and the way, most likely, they want to say it is that "Because I care way more about you (your present and future) than you seem to at the moment." Once you grow older and mature, almost everybody realizes that their parents always did what they thought was best for their children because the child was confused/distracted and couldn't see it yet....and most believe that when they get older.