I'm dating this guy that I have been interested in for a while. Things are going great, we spend some time together each day and we like each other a lot. One thing is though that we are very different- we really fall into the whole "opposites attract" idea and we varying interests and do our own thing a lot. Is this okay? Any advice on how to keep the relationship strong so we don't end up drifting apart with our own lives?
2007-11-16 07:09:52 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
the overly simplified maxim I've heard is it's fine to have opposite interests, even opposite personality types, but not opposite values.
My wife and I have spent evenings with me outside stargazing with my telescope while she's inside doing counted cross-stitch. Or occassionally one of us will go away for a weekend (she might visit a friend who lives far away, and I might go off hiking in the woods.)
We have been married for 23 years. Our separate interests and activities give us more things to talk about with each other. (You don't have to share an interest of his to be interested in hearing how he relates to that activity.)
And frankly, I think not being on top of each other all the time is a strength. We each need time alone.
So, yes, it can work :)
2007-11-16 07:46:12 · answer #1 · answered by Michael M 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's great that you both are comfortable and secure with doing your own thing and following your own interests, but it is also worth it to try to find some common interests to do together, too. And if somethign is really really important to one of you, then the other should try to learn about it in order to be supportive. Neither of you should demand that the other change, because the "opposites" thing really does work well sometimes, but you don't want to diverge so much that you feel like the other can't relate to you. Maybe to spend more time together you can occasionally trade off -- so that you agree to do something together one night that you choose, and another night tyou'll do something that he chooses. And the rest of the time, follow your own passion....
2007-11-16 07:40:06 · answer #2 · answered by timewaster 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That opposites attract thing really seems to be working 4 u. if it works, then y ruin it. try finding things that u both like to help u guys and just stick with each other. i think that sounds great 4 u.
2007-11-16 10:19:13 · answer #3 · answered by Shelly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Me and my husband have plenty of different interests, so I know that it's fine :)
You may find in time, that it would be easier if you share a common interest, so perhaps that's what you can be aiming for!
But seriously, don't get hung up on it. If you guys have a great relationship, just enjoy it!
2007-11-16 07:18:18 · answer #4 · answered by Becci 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know what they say "Opposites attarct"
2007-11-16 07:16:13 · answer #5 · answered by domenicmall 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋