2007-11-16 05:51:44 · 21 answers · asked by girlplease 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yes, and I would try to confront them together so they both knew they were busted and couldn't deny anything.
2007-11-16 05:55:57 · answer #1 · answered by ♥ terry g ♥ 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I do not think contacting this woman is a wise thing to do unless this woman was a friend or relative, and you want to let her know that she betrayed you, but aside from that, what do you expect to get from her that will improve the condition of your marriage?
You said this woman already knows he’s married which means that she has no consideration for your feelings. If you contact her, you are putting her in a very powerful position. You will be putty in her hands. She will never tell you what you want to hear (that she will leave him alone), give you the hurtful details about their tryst or no details at all, and if she is not what you expected aesthetically that may make you even angrier and have more reason to feel insecure (e.g. she’s prettier, thinner, younger, or ugly, etc.).
Women in these situations waste time confronting the “other woman” because they do not have control over the way things are going in their relationship. Even if you scare this one off you’ll probably still have more mistresses to confront in the future. No man is worth you embarrassing and exhausting yourself. If he is not making an effort to change his ways he will never do right by you anyway.
There is a difference between “fighting over a man” and “fighting for the relationship”. I wish more women understood the difference. You wasting time focusing on the “other woman” shows you are more preoccupied with controlling everything and winning than trying to work at fixing the problems in your relationship.
Picking with the other woman is only giving the husband another reason to loose even more respect for you especially if that’s the only consequence for him cheating. This will not change his attitude and it may even encourage him to act out more.
You have a right to be angry, but your pain is misdirected. The person you should be confronting is that low-down cheating husband of yours. He is the one who has a commitment to you and should be held accountable for what has happened.
By the way, how do you know that he is telling the truth about his marital status? There are women out there that are naïve enough to believe lies (e.g. “I sleep in the guest room”, “We’re going through a divorce”, “It’s my house and she wont leave until the divorce is final”, etc.)
Keep your dignity and don’t let this other chick know you are not in control! Instead whoop his b#tt!
2007-11-19 17:14:48 · answer #2 · answered by anosey1 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes and No. Yes because you want closure. No because it wasn't her fault, it's his fault. She doesn't owe you anything. So what she knew, she's not your friend, cousin, sister,etc. You need to confront him. When a husband cheats the wife wants to point her hand at the woman, forget the woman. You didn't marry her and you don't love her.. Your problem and questions are for your husband.
2007-11-16 15:23:29 · answer #3 · answered by KSR 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i use to think i made a mistake by not confronting them, but actually what would change if u did? he made his choice, and it would be really hard to trust your heart with that kind of man again. if he already cheated than he chose her over u anyway and even if u did speak to her she would either deny it or there would be some huge fight between u and her, just not worth it. they probably wouldn't stop seeing each other anyway they would just be more careful or he would leave to be with her once he knew u knew, there would be no reason to hide it anymore.
2007-11-16 14:33:40 · answer #4 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Damn straight. I'd do the Tango all over that *****'s head. Yea, yea, I know she didn't owe me anything and yea, he's my husband but OH WELL.
That's the price she pays to play. I look at it as a hard lesson for her to learn. After that, she probably won't make the mistake of sleeping with a married man.
2007-11-16 14:32:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes because I would want to know why. Why would you break up my marriage? Why couldn't you find your own man? What possessed you? Especially if I had kids. My kids could end up growing up without a father because of some chick. I would want a real reason ,that I could live with.
2007-11-16 16:28:17 · answer #6 · answered by haitian princess 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
With me it was opposite when in committed relationship my cousin who was married flirted texted smsed yeah its cheating these days new ways to cheat long distance she told me about it herself then blamed him for everything abused left him for good he told me the truth changed got back together committed married.
2007-11-16 13:58:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had an ex fiancee', she confronted me, actually... I was "supposed" to be his offical woman... she was married... after she confronted me, I told her husband, lol! =) would I confront a woman if she knew my husband was married? depends... I would probably tell her husband/boyfriend/finacee' if she had one... and this would be after I dumped my husband...
2007-11-16 13:57:34 · answer #8 · answered by elvlayarvvi fEisty wife and mom 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I would confront her with his suitcases and tell her to enjoy the cheating loser
2007-11-16 13:55:26 · answer #9 · answered by married with kids 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Why? Your bone of contention is with him. It takes no balls to confront her.
The question is: Have you the brass ovaries to go head to head with him or will you go after her like a piece of cheap, hillbilly trailer trash?
I think the wisest choice is obvious...don't you?
2007-11-16 14:06:30 · answer #10 · answered by Quasimodo 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋