and then one thing led to another and we started attending the classes after mass as well. We are really into this, we feel really happy. We have been together for 21 years now and the lady who gives us the class asked us if we would like to get married. Now that we have been learning more about he church we realized that we should and we want to.
Now, i wanted a small wedding but in the bottom of my heart i have always dreamed about a big wedding...what should i do? Some people tell me it is a waste of money to go on a big trip or something, but for some reason i dream of that big day that i never had no matter the cost and my family and kids all in the wedding. What should I do?
By the way, if i do have a wedding should i put my mother and father as the god parents of the wedding? Is it okay?
2007-11-16 04:38:29 · 27 answers · asked by Trying to help 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Follow your dream and do it even it your family tells you it is a waste of money I feel the same way about weddings and I am sure that there is alot of women out there that feel the same way about this, and would love to have a big wedding. I think it would be just fine if your parents where to be the god parents of the wedding. Good Luck to you!
2007-11-16 04:43:38 · answer #1 · answered by Black Shadow 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people know you will know the crazy expense and agony, like all of the how to... and all of the people you have to consider including how your husband feels about it. Also, after living together for 21 years, if you go traditional, may look a bit foolish. But if you have a big family and you really want it, there's your answer, have the big wedding.
But the fact that you are asking for advice this early in the game says that you really don't know what you are getting yourself into. Go to the knot.com or run a search on wedding advice, it's crazy out there and I had a small wedding (25 guest, cocktails, no kids...how hard could that be?). Total strangers wanted to argue with me about my decisions. It's totally NUTS! Good Luck and Congrats!
2007-11-16 04:56:53 · answer #2 · answered by Katie M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When my husband and I married we decided we wanted to spend the money on our honeymoon. We both decided we wanted a beach wedding. We went to the local town beach at 7:00 am and got married before a small group of our immediate family and close friends. It was the most beautiful ceremony. We stood a few feet away from the water and heard the waves crashing in the background. after the ceremony we ran to the water and splashed around wetting our feet. the photographer stood a few feet away and got some beautiful candid shots of the two of us smiling and playing around and kissing with our feet in the water. Afterwards we had a party at his parents house in the backyard with a tent and catered food. everyone loved it and our friends had a great time. they loved the relaxed laid back attitude of the party and so did we. We took a two week honeymoon to a beautiful resort which was absolutely worth it. there were other married couples celebrating their honeymoon at this resort but most could only stay 5 days to a week because they couldnt afford it. We were so happy we were able to stay two weeks and to us it was much more enjoyable then spending thousands of dollards on a big fancy wedding. I loved getting married on the beach. The most important thing is that you love each other and are making a promise before god. Although we are not religious we are both spiritual and i felt much closer to god and nature by getting married by the water. If you want to get married in a church then by all means go for it. But that doesnt mean you have to spend a fortune. Personally, I feel a small intimate ceremony feels the most spiritual.
2007-11-16 05:39:25 · answer #3 · answered by Heather 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I got married outside of a K-mart by some crazy guy in a cowboy hat ................
my marriage is just as great as anyone elses, but looking back on it I sometimes regeret that I'll never wear a wedding dress or plan out the things everyone else gets to. I think later in life my husband and I might have an official renewing of vows or something to make up for it.
Maybe you can go somewhere in between where you don't spend too much money but still have your family there with you and have a wonderfull memorable day. You can pass out digital cameras to people and have them take pictures of it, and then that way you have cheap wedding memories.
2007-11-16 04:56:34 · answer #4 · answered by Mary 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you have the budget go for the big wedding, be sure you really have a budget not credit card! You can have a good one day wedding but after that you are broke then thats not a good sign of maturity! Matured person always invest in the future not just a one day deal!
Me and wife you have a simple wedding, we have a big saving but we choose the simple one a house intimate wedding with 50 guest of friends and relatives. The extra money we invest it in our house we want to start happy and enjoy our 3 years honeymoon!
Money is not the problem! the problem is your choice!
Parents is the most important guest in the wedding they are your roots. I will not advise them be the godparents, they are more than godparents!
2007-11-16 04:54:12 · answer #5 · answered by Jazzpogitos 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let me see if I understand - you've been together for 21 years and have never gotten married? Well, in the eyes of the State, you've been married for a very long time already.
Why not go to the Justice of the Peace, or have a small ceremony with your priest, then have a gathering of all your friends so that you can celebrate together.
If your parents are still around, you can honor them, but I have no idea about "god parents of the wedding". Usually, God Parents are for children, and you're definitely NOT children!
2007-11-16 04:43:23 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK here's the scoop.
You're legally married - you children aren't illegitimate.
BUT in the eyes of the RCC - you're not quite what we would call "married." So that's why the teacher spoke with you about "getting married."
As to a big wedding? Look that's up to you. If you and husband and finances all concur - well, then go ahead with the big blowout with all the trimmings.
There are no "god parents of the wedding" as far as I know - but it's good that you want to include your family - all of them - multiple generations etc.
Yeah. it's a good thing. Go for it - as long as it doesn't bankrupt your family.
2007-11-16 04:45:43 · answer #7 · answered by Barbara B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweety, it is your day and your wedding, If you want to you can put them on the invitations. :)
Now, you want a huge wedding , DO IT. It doesn't matter the age. My mom got married at 44! and she had a big wedding, is it expensive? Of course but it is only once in a lifetime. People it is gonna say that you are gonna waste your money, do not listen to them. Whe I got married I had a huge wedding, expensive . It was a military one. And somepeople used to tell me, it is better f you save your money, bla-bla-bla... My wish came true! Plan your wedding, look for good and cheap vendors, it is cheaper if you plan it by yourself. I did that was harder, but i had so much fun. Good look. God called to the church so you and your husband could make your wish true! :)
2007-11-16 04:49:43 · answer #8 · answered by mimimimi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have a very small intimate wedding and then go on a nice honeymoon! Whats the point of spending a ton of money on a wedding when you have been together for sooo long anyways. Ya'll need a awesome trip together instead.
2007-11-16 04:42:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
So...your first wedding was a civil marriage (i.e. at City Hall/by a Justice of the Peace)? I presume this because I don' t understand why you want to "marry your HUSBAND."
If you've been together this long, I'm sure you've had a chance to save up a significant amount. You only live once...do what you want on your church wedding and honeymoon. :-)
2007-11-16 04:42:07 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋