What is a happy marriage and how you make it last?

Question

I know there is not such a thing 'perfect marriage'. I am sure everyone deal with different problems in a marriage.
Are you happy with your marriage and how you try to make it work when there are problems? What are the problems you deal more with?
I always have problems dealing with my husband when is about sex. Not filling eachother needs enough. I am younger, I want more. He is older than me so he wants less. The rest is actually perfect in my marriage.
How about you?
Thanks.

Answer 1

First you must find someone who shares your same moral and spiritual outlook in life, has the same ideas about children, money, etc. Someone who treats you with respect, and whom you admire and are attracted to. Don't buy into the Hollywood ideal of your "soul mate" or "happily ever after." Marriage takes commitment and hard work. Choosing wisely the person whom you marry, not letting your heart or your body make a decision your better judgment disagrees with, is the first key.

Second, you must view marriage as a total commitment. After you are married don't waste your time wondering, "Did I marry the right person?" but "How can I make this the best marriage it can be?"

Third, marriage is not a 50/50 proposition. Always be willing to do and compromise more than what you feel is your fair share, and hopefully your spouse has the same philosophy. If you are both giving 100%, you can't help but meet somewhere in the middle.

And last, realize that everyone goes through rough patches in their marriage, sometimes for long, long stretches of time. Don't give up. If you have all the above things in common, and you are committed to making the marriage work, things will come around again.

The biggest problem we've faced in the last few years is very similar to yours. It is very difficult at times, but I remind myself of all the areas of our life in which we are so happy and compatible and try to keep things in perspective. Sure it can be very frustrating at times, but a lack of sexual compatibility IMO is not a valid reason to end a marriage.

Answer 2

There are courses, books, marriage retreats, and more to help you navigate through one of the biggest decisions of your life. Try to get as much information as possible before and after you make this decision. It has to be something you would be willing to maintain with hard work and enduring some emotional times. There will be tough times. But the commitment the two of you make will be the deciding factor in how long it lasts. I'm married and fortunate enough to have a husband who doesn't believe in divorce and is willing to work right along side me. Struggles for power in the relationship will not help build a lasting foundation. Remember a husband, is part of the glue that bands your family together. So getting to know how he reacts to stressful events would be good. Take your time.

Answer 3

Hi Mia,
It is sometimes difficult for two people to always agree on everything. We must learn to give and take. I try to be as giving as possible to and for my wife. We have been married for 32years and met by accident. I used to play basketball with some friends every day that we were able to do so. Generally, that was after school and late in the evenings. We left there and went to the local Dairy Queen one evening and I was joking with an older lady that worked there about what she was doing Saturday evening when she introduced me to another young lady. We talked for a few minutes and decided to go to the movies on that Saturday evening. I "later" realized that I had another date to go skating earlier in the day with another classmate (Jane). I decided to do both. I dropped Jane off at home then showered and picked up the second. She and I met several of Jane's friends at the movies. I was harassed the remainder of the year about it by Jane and her friends. The second young lady and I went to the Prom my Junior and Senior years. We continued to date and have been married for 32+ years. We became Christians about twenty years ago and share our Lives with GOD. HE is the glue that holds our lives together. I have been so fortunate that HE has provided me with such a wonderful wife, children, grandson, parents, family, and Church friends/family. I have been a diabetic for over 40 years and I am now disabled as a result but HE is always there to listen to me and to assist when I need HIM. Have a wonderful life together!
Thanks,
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Answer 4

A happy marriage I believe is where a husband and wife, love & respect each other, and have open and honest communication with each other.

How do you make it last. Take time for a date night, at least once a week to have a date with your spouse, also when conflicts come up in your marriage, don't keep it to yourself what the problem is, sit down and talk with your spouse about it, not yelling, but sit and talk, and listen to each other and not interupt when your husband is talking, and he not interupt you.

Answer 5

I am happy in my marriage and I have the same problem as you. To me a happy marriage is just finding someone that you can see eye to eye on the core issues of things, but have enough differences to make it interesting. Also, someone who can compromise with you and help you meet in the middle. Also, someone who can keep things fun and spontaneous. That is just my definition.

Answer 6

We talk about all problems that may come up and try to come up with something that well make us both happy. Our marriage is all about compromise...

Answer 7

We have excellent communication, commitment, love, & laughter in our relationship.