im 18 and my bf is 21?

Question

weve been dating almost 2 and a half years. he brought up marriage in the past and i said no i felt too young. he isnt pressuring me to do anything.but lately i have been kinda wishing i can marry him. i kno its a big responsibility and all. im ok with that i have experience..im # 8 of 9 kids and have 17 neices and nephews. but the thing is i kinda want someone in my grade or someone i kno my age to get engaged first like i dont wanna be the first one bc i feel like its young and im uncomfortable...do you understand or think its weird... i want your opinions. thanks

thanks guys so much

Answer 1

Why are you waiting for some of your friends to do it first? I bet half of them wish they'd found a relationship like yours. Your not to young to commit. Get engaged and if it doesn't work then you can always break it off! Don't ever waite for others to do something first before you as this is how many have missed opportunities in life. You go for it girl.

-x-

Answer 2

18 is WAY too young to even consider it. Yeah, it might work for some, but we're talking like 1-2% of marriages at that age.

Look at it this way: Can you see how much you've changed from the time you started high school until now? That's a four-year span. I'm not sure if you're 18 and in college, but that really doesn't matter. From 18 to 22, you'll change more dramatically in those four years than you did in those four years of high school. By the time you're 25, the two of you will be two totally different people than you are now. Maybe for the better, but then maybe not. You will each grow up even more and your interests will change. That doesn't mean that you'll lose interest in one another, per se, but you might (more than likely) not even have the same interests any longer.

Give it time and patience. Wait.

Answer 3

What a lot of the people who are answering seem to be forgetting is that an engagement is a promise, not a guarantee. If you and your boyfriend sit down and discuss this together, and feel that you are both ready to take this step in your relationship, than go ahead and get engaged. An engagement does not mean an immediate wedding, it means a promise to one day get married. Finish school, get a career. If you two change your minds, you can end the engagement. If you don't, you can continue and get married.

As for being the first to get engaged, you don't have to announce it if you don't want to. It's your engagement, it's yours to keep as private or public as you want. The other girls will most likely be delighted by it, and ask lots of questions. Just tell them you love your boyfriend, you want to be with him, and you will be getting married after college/after you're settled in a career/in years. If you don't want to answer any questions, just tell them there is nothing to answer, you love him and will one day marry him.

This is something between you and your boyfriend. It has nothing to do with the other kids at school, it is solely about the relationship you and your boyfriend have. Do you love eachother? Don't let fear of being the first dictate what you do, somebody has to be first, why not let it be someone who is worth it.

Answer 4

No this isn't any longer undesirable, you're the two considered one of criminal age and who cares what anybody else thinks. My spouse is two and a a million/2 years older than me and we began dating while i exchange into 18. we've been married for 21 and a a million/2 years.

Answer 5

If his age bothers you that much, or your own age for that matter, don't do it. You shouldn't get married unless you are absolutely sure. Everybody has doubts about marriage and the committment itself but they shouldn't be about the person you are trying to marry.
I think you are showing real maturity. A lot of girls your age would not think twice. Good for you. If he loves you, he will understand and he'll wait. After all, you have the rest of your lives. There is no big rush.

Answer 6

You ask for an honest opinion, so I will give you the best advice I could give anyone thinking about marriage. Wait until you are secure financially before getting married. You will not regret it. It is so much easier to make a marriage work, and last when the financial worries are at a minimum.

Answer 7

You shouldn't even think of getting married at your age. You're only a teenager. That marriage will get destroyed, no matter what, when your real man comes along. He is out there, but at 18 he certainly didn't arrive yet.

Just enjoy life (NEVER GET PREGNANT) and forget about marriage. Marriage will come, but it should be late 20's, early 30's. You should know eachother inside and out, mentally, emotionally and physically. You should love, respect, trust, communicate and make eachother happy, not yourselves. You should be ready to spend the rest of your life with your partner, till death do you part and you shouldn't wonder about anything.

Believe me, I met the man of my dreams when I was 33! Well, he was worth the wait, because my husband is too good to be true. DO NOT GET MARRIED!

Answer 8

I got married at 23 and got divorced not too long after that. I'm not saying that will happen to you, but at 18 you've still got a lot of life in front of you. I would recommend waiting for a bit...

Answer 9

Marriage is something deep you can't rush it. Think about it discuss it and plan ahead. you know what happens when your married. you do stuff and tied to it, you can't do much things and so on. and one more thing your only 18 even though he is 21 he still is too young. Think about it think about things like your future children what might happen.

Answer 10

its good that you guys are preparing for your future but as for you, you're so young to get married. you should finish school first. graduating from school is the best decision that you can make for life..

you should also be financially stable when you get married, sounds cliche but love can't feed you...

gud luck!!