Friends hubby is attracting toward me?

Question

Hi all I am prity here. I am having one huge problem that is taking up all warmness and color out of my life.

I am divorcee from my husband because due to emotional blackmails from his family side, it was very much bad so in those days I came to know one lady friend who also divorcee, she got thru her problem and that with two kids so she initially reached out to me giving support and phone calls and all when I was suicidal and in misery.So we become fast friends and at some point I feel she is saving my life. She has got married and that with two kids from previous marriage so I felt some hopes for myself.

These days I am spending lot of time in her house, and I slowly slowly came to see what a great guy her husband is. He is very emotional with her and attached, loving guy that I haven't seen in long time, and brave coz he fought with his parents to marry her even tho she is divorcee, and very much emotionally attached wtih her kids like they are his own. They only been togehter some two years. Now I am looking at him in whole new light to see, what kind of great guy does all these? And they had only one child together so he is supporting four people and buying his wife expensive gift like ipod, HP notebook, new cell phone, ect. Treating her so good! It's making me want him and althogh initially he was not attractive to me but now I find him irrisistable.

She calls me over for dinner and lot of things I notice- 1. she cannot keep totally clean house as she suffers from some illness related to her pregnancy 2. she is very much overweight and fat - yet he still seems to show much affectionated for her. I don't know why.

I know I am hiding this feeling in my heart but I cannot resist much longer. I don't want to get hurt in any way. Sometimes I think, if he is such a good guy he can accept this lady and her kids then he can surely accept me and I with no kids even! And I keep such clean house and have great figure too. So maybe deep deep in his mind he is ready to go for better relationship, ie with me. I lay awake at nights thinking on this, that how can I approach him, what should I say? I am sure if he compares me with his wife he will find me much better and more suitable. All the color is come out of my life since I got to know what a great guy he is. Now I feel direct need to approach him and show him how I feel. Can I please get some advice, how to fix this problem? What can I say to him, I don't want to look bad but I must step up as his wife is very much overweight and I am sure we are much better match than that. What words can I use?

Answer 1

If he is a good guy he's going to brush you off. She just had his child, and she is ill, what kind of guy is going to leave his wife like that? You just need to find your own guy, go buy some cheap clothes and hit some bars, you'll find exactly what you deserve there.

Answer 2

How VERY sad YOU are! Is this the way you treat a friend, a good friend at that? You keep repeating the fact that this man should leave his wife because she is "Fat"? SOOO.....WHAT!! If she's overweight, he must like that, otherwise he wouldn't have hooked up w/her in the first place. If you think a person with 3 young kids is EVER going to be able to keep her house as clean and tidy as a home w/out children, then you obviously are delusional !!
I really doubt there's any possibility of you and this man becoming a pair. Just by the few things you said on here, its very obvious that you suffer from some huge emotional problems. You are so desperate for any kind of attention or affection, that anyone who shows any kindness towards you at all, you take it as more than its meant to be and go into a "fantasy" world of your own. You need to get away from your friend, Before she is hurt when she finds out what a scandalous back stabber you really are. Find another person to do all that shes done for you. You will end up feeling ashamed and guilty, if you proceed with these crazy ideas you have. Do them all a favor and get as far away from there family as you can. Otherwise you'll end up flipping out, when he laughs in your face, and tells you he'd never go for somebody like YOU..!Probably end up killing his wife and stalking him. C R A Z Y ! GET HELP! A.S.A.P!

Answer 3

First of all, I think you are being very immature. Second of all, you don't NEED to know if he's interested in you or not. You should have left your girlie crushes at the alter. I get the feeling you don't even know what marriage is all about, or even care. You need to grow up hun, and I mean that in the nicest way. You sound childish, and you probably shouldn't have gotten married when you did. All couples have their problems....but they work on them and get through them...together! That's what marriage is all about. Give your husband a chance, give your marriage a chance. Leave the co-worker alone.

Answer 4

If he is willing to go on with you he is NOT that great He promised to keep her onto himself, until death do they part. You would be a home wrecker and loose her as a friend. No winners in the situation only loosers GET OUT NOW

Answer 5

You are going to end up being a selfish homewrecker. Stay out of that man's life. DO NOT TAKE HIM AWAY FROM HER AND HER CHILDREN.

Answer 6

I think you need to stay out of their marriage. It obviously does not matter to him if his wife is overweight. He loves her, not you. You should be ashamed to call yourself a friend. Stay out of it.

Answer 7

A true friend doesn't lust after what is unavailable.
Why would you want to think of ruining someone else's life?

Answer 8

wow you need to be her friend not her homewrecker if he wanted you he would already be with you...he had a baby with her because he wanted to share his love with her not you..you are trying to force yourself somewhere you dont belongn he will tell her if you say anything to him and then you are going to lose them both as friends

Answer 9

sounds like jealousy to me. if he doesn't mind her weight, why should you? he loves her, stay out of it!

Answer 10

shows how envious and selfish you are. please stay out of their relation and try not to make your problem, their problem.