Really uncomfterable....?

Question

ok this is hard to ask but i have to. Well lately some times my white friends like are talking about like random stuff. whenever theres like a african-american in the story they are telling it makes me feel uncomfterable when they say "black person". They sometimes make racist jokes that r suppose to be funny. This other african-american kid laughs but i feel rly bad and weird. One of my white friends said once "Once i was walking down the street and there was this black dude rapping and it was weird." I felt rly uncomfterable after this. How can i not feel this way or tell my "friends" to stop with all this?

P.s i didnt kno where to put this question so please no comments on that.

THe racist jokes arent rly nice! plus I want u to kno that my friends r white ok? Its rly weird saying racist jokes infront of everyone and im like the only african-american kid there. Its rly weird ok?

Ok ppl. Stop saying u said white friends. Alright how would u feel to be the only person of ur race in a room with other races making fun of ur race?

Answer 1

They just do not know how to relate to you. Unfortunately, you may not realize it, but you probably do not always make them comfortable either. It happens that way because people are raised differently. It would be helpful if you brought up the subject, and tried to teach them about your culture, and learn more about theirs too.

It is hard to know what offends another person if you are not living the same lifestyle. I am sure that they do not realize that they are hurting you.

Maybe you could talk to your counselor about organizing a club or something to teach other about different cultures. I am sure that there are also some other people of different heritages that would be helped as well.

Answer 2

I don't get it. You feel uncomfortable when someone says black person as opposed to african american? AHA! But you just said white friends! Hon I don't know about all this political correctness stuff it's hard to deal with. People get very offended too easily and they probably shouldn't. I guess if they're telling racist jokes and that makes you feel uncomfortable that's normal I guess. I don't know. I hear people make racist jokes towards even white people and i'm white and I don't really take it personally because it's not meant towards me and maybe sometimes it is but I don't care it's just racial profiling. At the end of it all do your friends really love you and they don't care what race you are? Do you care that they're white? I guess I don't understand this

Answer 3

As a white person I must tell you that I did the same until I was told that I do not need to specify color when relating a story. They said; "How would you feel if every time I spoke of a persons actions I specified that they were white, would you feel a bit isolated?"
I was horrified, I did not mean to hurt the person. She was my best friend for cripes sake!! I did not understand how it made her feel till she told me, as they do not. I realized that it reminds them that it is not necessary. Maybe if you explain it to them then you will be helping them, as my friend helped me.
Lisa B

Answer 4

I know what you're saying. I'm Hispanic and usually when my friends who aren't hispanic say wet back or something else that's racist about my race it doesn't offend me. But when they say it it's usually a joke. The only time I get offended is when someone of another race says things like that and they don't know me that well. lol Weird I know. But if your friends are talking like this, let them know it makes you feel awkward when they slam your race.

Answer 5

just tell them that it makes you uncomfortable.
they should understand.
there's no way for them to know they're hurting you if you don't say anything
i don't know why they need to point out if the person is black or not, because they're still a person. but maybe they're using specific details for effect.
i know where your coming from.
i used to feel the same way.
it doesn't bother me at all anymore.
lmao, i actually do the same thing they do sometimes and i'm african american.
well- best of luck sweetstuff :]

Answer 6

it depends on what you want your friends to change.

do you want them to use the phrase African-American and not black?

"you know, i am uncomfortable when you call African American people black. Would you mind using the phrase African American instead?"

But if you are uncomfortable about the jokes,
tell them. especially tell them that it makes you feel bad.

Answer 7

If they are really your friends they will understand if you talk to them and tell them how you feel. If they don't understand maybe they weren't as good of friends as you thought they were, and you shouldn't be around people like that.

Answer 8

Just tell them..."It really makes me uncomfortable when you say 'black person' instead of 'African-American'. Could you please not say it like that around me?" And if they don't respect what you've asked, they're not good friends and I suggest you find some who will respect your feelings. Good luck!

Answer 9

tell them how you feel and that it makes you uncomfortable and if they cant accept that then you should try and get new and better friends but still hang out with the others on ocasion

Answer 10

i'm sorry you're uncomfterable

referring to someone as a "black person" is like referring to your friends as your "white friends," which you just did.

it's no big deal. you do it, too, so don't take it offensively. why should it be offensive to describe someone by their race? their race is a part of who they are, and it's nothing to be ashamed of. the subject of race shouldn't be considered so taboo...it's just skin pigment. considering it as taboo only worsens the problem.