From your grandchild? Do you expect your daughter or son to back your decisions to disipline him/her? I feel like it's my home and the boy will abide by my rules or else momma can find someone else to babysit this 9 year old! Am I crazy??
2007-11-15 15:43:49 · 19 answers · asked by Thunderrolls 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Senior Citizens
It's YOUR home, the child should follow your rules and treat you with respect. It's sad but these days it seems like parents are afraid of their kids. I'm a teacher and I've had parents who tell me their child determines everything from what time they go to bed to what they eat.
I certainly would expect my children to abide by my rules. I made them do it, I'm not going to suddenly go soft and put up with some snotty grand kid!
2007-11-15 16:48:04 · answer #1 · answered by katydid 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ha! Not crazy at all...I am in the same situation, only I have THREE boys aged 8, 11 & 12 that I look after daily. And since their mothers LIVE WITH ME, I can never get away from them either!
My oldest daughter (who is the mother of the oldest grandson) was especially bad at disciplining her child. Didn't want to have to do this after working all day. Thought I was overreacting (like usual--she said) until just this past week, when she had absolute proof right before her eyes that her son not only disrespects ME, but HER as well. He has been forging BOTH of our signatures to his classroom agenda and "notes" to the teacher to get him out of his homework assignments.
This is a kid who is failing Grade 7 abyssmally. He is in the Homework Club, and the Study Group, and he STILL fails his tests. And all because he just can't be bothered to put in the effort at learning.
This is the child that I wanted to home school this year, because we had a small taste of this attitude last year, and my concerns were just brushed off.
But yes....I guess you can tell I have a very strong opinion on this issue. This IS my house. My daughters work full time to pay the bills (I have two daughters living here with me, and the youngest one's boyfriend), and I babysit their children for free. (Or I guess you can say that I earn every bit of the money they give me to pay the bills!)
I am willing to compromise on the "rules", but I WON'T be sassed back at. I WON'T allow the children to argue with me (discussion is fine--not argument--I am the adult). And I expect to be treated as something other than part of the furniture.
Your daughter and grandson obviously don't live with you...you just watch him while she works? Set the ground rules for each of them, and sit them down to inform them of the rules together. That way neither one of them can tell you that they "forgot". Also tell them that you are dead serious about the rules, and if they don't want to abide by them, then they can seek somewhere else for the child to stay while his Mom works. You are definitely NOT over the line.
2007-11-15 16:53:45 · answer #2 · answered by Susie Q 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No - absolutely not..you are NOT crazy or unreasonable. I do not abide disrespect from any body's children, much less my own family. He needs to learn.
My daughters do not tolerate their children being disrespectful so I rarely have to say a thing...anyhow the kids are pretty good and treat me like royalty.
Talk to his parents - those values of behavior start at home and should be reinforced by them
2007-11-16 00:01:45 · answer #3 · answered by sage seeker 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No, I don't put up with disrespect. My grandchildren are all respectful of me; all 5 of them. Their parents would be very upset if they weren't. Only one has ever even tried to be disrespectful. He is ADHD and it was more difficult for him. I told his mom I would not sit for him if he wasn't respectful. Now that he takes medication, he's great. We go to pro basketball games together about twice a month. I think they don't know what I'd do so they don't even try. I don't discipline them. Don't need to because they just behave around Grammy.
They all feel at home here and that this is a safe place for them. I've had each one here a lot. Even at 15 my grandson came over just to spend the night. I do spoil them. I think it's the parents job to discipline them and my job is to enjoy them.
2007-11-15 15:54:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
No, I don't think you are crazy. My grand children were taught at a very young age the rules. We have no problems. My kids however dicipline their kids when they are here I usually don't have too. When I "babysit" we usually do fun things so dicipline is not a problem, they are too busy. If they do get whinning the "look" brings them around or I just find something to do to take their mind off the issue. I try to make mine a fun house but sometmes they do need talked to. And if I do talk to them my kids back me up.
2007-11-15 15:52:19 · answer #5 · answered by doxie 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
properly in view that i don't understand your boyfriend it quite is perplexing to assert whether or no longer your little ones have actual concerns or no longer. according to threat they're being disrespectful or according to threat you're too caught up interior the dating to be sure what's under your nostril and the justifications that your little ones are being disrespectful are actual ones. according to threat you ought to attempt and communicate on your little ones and ask them their motives for the concern and whether they are in a position to't be taken care of out only ask permission to be sure the grandkids. i can relate on your undertaking as my mom has long previous over a three hundred and sixty 5 days with out seeing my sisters youngsters as my sister is a bi*ch. i understand that mum only can't bypass with out seeing them even nevertheless they have been pronounced badly with the aid of a loopy mom. only open the strains of communication at the same time with your little ones and notice the place it takes you
2016-10-16 22:25:17 · answer #6 · answered by staude 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is tough when you are the paternal grandmother. The daughter in law typically prefers her own mother and that is where the grand kids seem to go first. Respect for adults and the magic words like please and thank you are not too much to ask! I am the mother of 3 sons and a daughter. My daughter's children are the best behaved and the most respectful. When I speak to my son's about their children's behavior, they just fly to the defensive.
2007-11-15 19:34:32 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No. You aren't crazy but we must respect the mother's wishes with regard to how she desire's her child to be disiplined. No you don't have to babysit an unruley child but she, as the child's mother must teach her child that it is YOUR home and that the child will respect it as such just as your children did. Let her know it's your house. Your rules. If she doesn't like the idea of RESPECTING YOUR house, find another babysitter.
2007-11-15 15:50:59 · answer #8 · answered by Carol T 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Our children do not tolerate disrespecting us. I guess you could say it is dishonoring to them in our eyes if their children are disobedient to us because, (of the way we reared them) may imply there is a lack of discipline in their home. Have an 11 year old Grandson who has been through hard times recently, tried to pull the wool over my eyes, so to speak but realizing quickly, doesn't like choosing the consequences of disrespect.
2007-11-15 17:13:13 · answer #9 · answered by kriend 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree with you 100%. When my grandma use to babysit me if I did something wrong I got disiplined
2007-11-15 15:48:42 · answer #10 · answered by nice3fishinggal 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋