How can I help friend stop doing drugs???

Question

I'm 13. My best friend Kerstin is 17. She does drugs. She has since she was 12. She drinks and smokes as well. Her dad doesnt give a **** about her. He beats her and the rest of her family. They've called the police over 20 times but the police do nothing. Her mother doesnt care what Kerstin does. She knows Kerstin does drugs and does them with her. Kerstin's parents are divorced though.

Kerstin lives in Florida while i live in indiana. Her friends that she hangs out with there, most do drugs as well and have since they were 12 too. Kerstin has bone marrow disease and its really bad. She also has cancer. She will die. Its definate that she will. I've known her for a year and have grown close to her. She's like a big sister to me.

I dont do drugs. Yes, I used to but I quite after I saw what they did to Kerstin. She has turned me against them forever. I want to help her stop drugs. She doesnt want to. She likes getting high and does it frequently.

How can i help her stop doing drugs seeing that I live in Indiana and she lives in Florida???

I know if she has cancer it won't save her life, but it will help extend it. Her cancer is so bad that treatment doesnt help one bit.

So how may I help her stop doing drugs when she doesnt want to.???

And I'm not going to stop being friends with her ever. That is not even an option. So if you are going to tell me that dont even answer.

In repsonse to wicked warrior- She does meth, cocaine, pot, heroine etc etc. Everything but speed because that killed two of her best friends which caused her to do more drugs.

Answer 1

Intervention

Answer 2

Oh Bubble what a sad tale, my heart is breaking for you.

I am so glad you have seen the light so early in your life. Please stay away from drugs.

As for your friend Kerstin, well all you can do is tell her how you feel and let her know that you will be there for her if she ever needs you (but of course never give her money because it will go on drugs)

It's the way she feels about herself, which is pretty bad I think, considering the way her parents have treated her, is what is leading her to seek out drugs. And the people she hangs with now just reinforce her useage.

If there is some way that she could get away from her current situation and start again that would be best, other than that it is entirely up to her. You certainly can't talk her out of it, but you can say that prefer your life without drugs and you would love her to be drug-free as well.

I was a drug addict (amphetamines) for 31/2 years and I know they can be beaten, but only if the person WANTS TO STOP.

I hope this all works out, because I would not wish addiction on anyone

Answer 3

It is a bad situation. You didn't mention your ages, but you sound very mature and have a good head on your shoulders. Her responses to you sound very typical of an addict. It will only get worse for her and her family if it isn't stopped immediately. I would have a heart to heart talk with her one more time. ( Not texting, actual face to face) Tell her that there are alot of resources for these problems and it will lead to a terrible life full of misery if she doesn't seek help. And it does lead to ruined lives, I have seen it several times with more people than I care to remember. If you love her and talking doesn't work, tell her parents. She may hate you for it at first, but she will thank you later. I wish I would have done this with many of my friends. Most are dead or in prison. Best of luck to you and be strong.

Answer 4

Kerstin is going to have to decide on her own whether or not she wants to quit. She is going to have to hit rock bottom, have something really bad happen to her for her to stop. There is nothing stopping her right now from quitting.
As a friend, you can be there for her, and tell her how you feel. But you should set some boundaries!

Answer 5

You are 13 and a former drug user? Oi vay...what's the world coming to? I didn't do drugs until 14 and even then it was strictly marijuana until college. I didn't even touch liquor and when I could get alcohol it was usually just beer.

The kids today have it so much better. This girl needs to calm down and thank everyone in her life that gave her access to such wonderful drugs. Then she has to commit to not getting messed up long enough to straighten things out. If she started at 12, chances are she isn't gonna quit any time soon.

You need to stop thinking about his person and letting her affect you so much. She made her decisions (the ones that weren't made for her already), and she is going to go through hell before she realizes she needs help, if she ever does. At 13 you aren't ready to deal with everything that's gonna happen. I suggest you stay in touch but don't visit her or ask her to come over unless it's to find a place to clean up. Whatever you do DON'T save up money and send it to her...she will never use it for rehab. The most you can do is listen to her bitching from afar and try not to let it get you down too much.

Answer 6

I don't know if you'll believe me, but this is a phase which is pretty much part of some people's growing up. I used to be the top 'anti-drug' advocate, but after my boyfriend beat me up I just sort of snapped, and I wanted to get high. But eventually I grew out of it. Not because "drugs are bad" (because I dont believe for a second that marijuana should be illigal) but I did it because I got my shits'n'giggles and I was interested in something new.
I bet when she moves out she'll get her life together, but stand by her! Don't ever give up! Let her make mistakes, and help her through them or fix them.
Sorry if I didnt help :( Best of luck!

Answer 7

I'm so sorry to hear that story. It saddens me to hear of someone wasting their life away. I used to be addicted to drugs and what I've learned is that you can lead a horse to water but yu can't make them drink it. I'd give it a lot of prayer
She will come around when SHE'S ready and not a minute sooner. I am going through a similar situation and I know it hurts and is hard. I will pray for the both of you........
Hugs :)

Answer 8

First off all, DRUGS ARE BAD!!
Looking at the situation and in condition you're friend is, it's a bit yes no....she's WAY to young to have this disease, to do drugs...but maybe she uses drugs to ease the pain...What kind of drugs does she use??

Isn't there a teacher or a schoolcounselor, you can contact over there?? Someone who can help her trough these bad times, someone to talk to??

Answer 9

Buble, it very sad...your story. I was going to start off by telling you to let her parents know what she is doing but obviously that won't do any good since they are part of her problem. The only thing honestly you can do is be there for her, support her and just keep trying to give her your opinion on what drugs are doing to her. Being that your in Hawaii and are only 13 it's not like there is really much you can do. i don't know if you know any other family members of hers that you can call and ask them to help you get her help...if so try that.

Answer 10

Your a good friend but you have to remember, you can't help someone who doesn't want to help themselves. You are definitely stronger than your friend considering you quit. That's what she needs now, a strong person to lean on. Sounds like her family is useless, they obviously don't care about her, which is probably the reason she's using drugs - to get away from the reality of her abusive family.

All I can advice is be there for her. I read a great quote once that taught me alot when it came to helping others - "You take people as far as they will go, not as far as you would like them to go." Good luck to you and your friend.

Answer 11

The only person who can make Kerstin quite doing drugs is Kerstin. The only thing you can do is let her know that you care about her and your feelings about her drug use. Encourage her to get help.