Happily married women and men...How did you know that you found the right person to spend the rest of your?

Question

life with? How old were you when you got married, and how long have you been married?

I do not plan on getting married anytime soon, but with the divorce rate as high as it is, marriage is a scarry thing. Just wondering how you knew it was "right"

Answer 1

As many people will tell you, "you just know" when it's right. I always heard that and, to be honest, I thought "well that's not very helpful!" I must say though that when I met my now husband, everyone was right.....you do "just know." You see, I'm like most women....I always analyzed my r'ships and my men. There were always the lists of mental pros and cons and "can I live with this forever" type of questions. When I met my husband, there was none of that. My soul just felt at peace - there was no questioning, no doubts...just 100% certainty which was very weird because I had NEVER felt that way with anyone. That's not to say we had a perfect r'ship or that HE was perfect but he was perfect FOR ME.

Besides having that "you just know" feeling, there were other practical issues we had in common that we both felt lead to a happy, healthy r'ship. We were both raised in similar family situations and values. For instance, our parents are still together and neither one of our families has EVER had a divorce. Our families are both religious but neither one of us is religious in the sense of going to church every Sunday but we both believe in the same things and on the same level. We both have the same values about children, hard work, love, marriage, etc. You can't make it work with someone if you don't see the same way on those fundamental things. We both saw marriage as a lifetime commitment, not a "we'll see what happens" kind of thing. We balanced each other's weaknesses and brought out the best in one another. He encouraged my passions, my independence, and my dreams so there were no control issues or dominance. We just saw eye to eye on everything big or important.....in fact, we saw eye to eye on even the little things. It was weird really. It was just as if we had been cut from the same cloth. Believe me,you will know when you meet Mr. Right. Until then, have fun with the Mr. Right Nows! :)

Answer 2

I had a very bad first marriage and during my divorce, made a several page list of what my next husband would be like. Not getting married again was not an option, as I refused to let my ex win by turning me into a bitter old prune.

My fiance meets very little of the criteria on that list. He is the wrong age, ethnic background, profession according to what I thought I wanted but is what I need. We have known each other 7 years now and are extremely happy. The first two years after we met, I thought I would marry someone else and was in a serious relationship and my fiance and I were friends. He was my best friend through my divorce, when my son was in the hospital for two years, when I was attacked (and got away) from a serial rapist and left my job because of it, when my house burned down with everything in it. He was there every day, often waiting up all night when I spent it at the hospital to give me an im when I got home to make sure i was ok.

My brother's murderer won a new trial after 7 years in prison, and they were going to release him from jail because the witness could not be found. My fiance surprised me by finding the key witness so that my brother's killer could still be brought to justice.

I was uninterested in him completely as a romantic relationship, even though our friends, and strangers like waitresses thought we were married. One guy in the hardware store told me we were married, I just didn't know it yet.

When I redid my will, my kids asked to have him as their guardian if I died.

Finally, after his father died, he called me up and told me he was having a rough time and needed to see me. That day I looked in his eyes and realized I'd been a real idiot for a long time and we've been together ever since.

We couldn't decide how to start dating so we decided to get married without ever going out on a date.

Answer 3

No do not let society ruin your dream. I have been married along time, I knew my husband was the one, the 4th night we hung out. I couldn't stop smelling his cologne in the wind I couldn't stop seeing his face in everyone else, I heard his voice in every-song that came on, I had to be with him every minute I missed him SO much my world crumbled without him. I knew he was the one the night he hugged me it felt like home. I wanted to curl up in his arms that night and never leave them, After many years together and MANY fights to keep it together I still feel the same stronger even! IT is the best feeling when it is the right one and when you know, you know. There is no mistaking it, you will never let it go when you got it. The divorce rate is so high because people forget why they love them and let it fall apart and don't think to fight for it so they let it go!

Answer 4

I knew when he moved 500 miles away and the thought of dating anyone else didn't appeal to me.

We've been together for 6 and a half years, married for two months. I can't imagine my life without his love, encouragement, support, and kindness.

Marriage is only scary when in your heart you know you're not wth the right person. When you are, divorce is the furthest thing from your mind.

Oh, and for the record, I am 27 and he is 39.

EDIT:

Damn. Why are all the good answers getting a thumbs down?

Answer 5

Well, Sweetie, I am going to tell you a tale that I have yet to tell anyone else. LONG ago the Lord revealed to me that I would have 2 children with Mr. Wrong and then would meet Mr. Right. In a vision He revealed to me that I would know The One by the feeling of our first true kiss of love/. HE sent me a premonition about our first, true KISS of LOVE. The sensations I experienced during the "vision" would be the same as when my true love admitted his love for me. I got married, had two children, suffered through a violent marriage and a long divorce and then met..... Guess Who..... MR. Right. We dated for almost a year before he declared his love for me and my two boys, but when he did, and he put his arms around me and kissed me...... I KNEW that he was the one that God had planned for me to be with. We have been married now for 6 years and have a little baby together as well as my two older boys. A happy family at last!!! Trust your instincts and trust in the Lord. Love an Luck--MissDelanne

Answer 6

I am female, married 5 yrs, happy as hell-
knew he was the one, when:
!)All I could think of was him (even past the 3 month mark)
2)waited until I was ready to have sex
3)made me feel like I was the only woman in the world, and
the most beautiful-
4) made me laugh
5) accepts all my idiosyncrasies, and I had a lot!
6) awesome in bed

AND- after 5 years- he is now...
READ #1-6 above!!!

Answer 7

Honestly, I left the whole marriage concept in God's hand. It was God that set me up with my spouse by putting people in my path and led me to my hubby. It was through friends that God put in my life. My hubby was looking for a wife but also prayed about it. We both didn't sweat it, just let it be. We met, dated 2 weeks, got married after 3 months and Feb 14, 2008 will be married for 13 years. It wasn't all honeymoon, but we always worked it out and became each other's best friend. We were caution who we let into our relationship male or female. It he felt someone was not right for me or just was using me, he'd tell me right away and I would too for him. We had each other's back at the same time gave each other space, respectively. God always was first in our marriage over each other and now it's God that we credit for keeping us strong and happy and in love all these years.

Answer 8

I knew because I thought about him every second we were apart. When anything happened, good or bad, he was the first one that I wanted to tell. I didn't feel complete without him. I got married when I was 18, we have been married 12 years and are still as happy as ever.

Answer 9

I'm engaged and getting married next year, but my fiance and I have been together for almost two years. I knew because I realized I could open up to him about the things most important to me including spirituality. When you share a belief system every thing seems to fall in to place because you have a foundation. We have something to build from that has been around forever and will last forever.

Answer 10

My husband and I dated two weeks and knew we were meant to be together. We were engaged for six months before we got married. This was in 1977 and we have been happily married for 30 years! I was 21 and he was 22. NO, I DON'T SUGGEST THIS TO EVERYONE....I told our son to be with someone longer than we were and he did. He and his wife dated and lived together for two years before they got married.