I know that there are support groups for adoptees. My adoption was not legal, and it will be almost impossible to find my family. I have very little information to go on. I do know that I have brothers and/or sisters that were born after me, and possibly two siblings born before I was. Any help would be GREATLY appreciated.
2007-11-15 02:55:53 · 7 answers · asked by bernih@sbcglobal.net 1 in Politics & Government ➔ Law & Ethics
go to the montel show..
2007-11-15 02:59:12 · answer #1 · answered by nickelbabe89 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Give it up. Sometimes you just have to accept things the way they are and make lemonade with your lemons.
What I just said might sound harsh to you, but based on my experience it is the best advice I can give you.
I was legally adopted, and during my teen years my adoptive parents offered to help me find my birth parents.I contacted the orphanage that I was adopted from and was basically told that when i was adopted things were set up so that the anonymity of the birth parents was protected. Legal wrangling would be required and it would cost several thousand dollars.
I thought that was totally unfair and rediculous. I felt that i was being asked to pay for something that was rightfully mine. I didn't go ahead with the procedure because i felt it would be supporting injustice.
Today at age 43 I am suffering from diabetes and life-threatening kidney disease. I might have been able to avert this illness had I had access to my family medical history (like most people).
At this point in the game I could spend the rest of my life fighting court battles and trying to obtain what i believe to be mine, or I can just accept that i was done an injustice and move on.
I understand the questions and feelings that being adopted brings on, but need to let it go so that i can enjoy what i have left. I will always have more questions than answers and accepting that will give me the freedom to get on with living without bitterness.
This may not be the answer you were looking for and maybe you have the youth and vigor to persist with your search. If that is the case, I wish you the best of luck. Just don't be disappointed when you realize that when it comes to adoption the word "fairness" has no meaning, and most of all don't let that disappointment ruin your life.
2007-11-15 03:38:41 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
There should be adoption support teams in most countries. Whether or not you were adopted legally or illegally should not make all that difference. Members of the teams know the ins and outs of adoptions and should be able to give good advice about the way to find birth parents and siblings.
I have my doubts about genealogy sites or professional genealogists being of much help as most of them .tend to conduct research into ancestors rather than people living today and as there are so many other sources of assistance I'd tend to forget about private eyes. You make no mention of where you live so I've looked for US sites ... the Salvation Army are an excellent organisation to approach when looking for missing people so they might be worth trying.
2007-11-15 05:07:18 · answer #3 · answered by Christopher P 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
try geneology.com, call the contact number on the site, for a fee they can try to find your family if you have enough info for them. These sites have ways of doing it.
Hire a private detective, or a lawyer, they can get information you will never get as a layman (private individual).
I am very sorry to hear about this. It's hard to find you that you are adopted, but to learn it is illegal must really be hard.
I hope you realize that you are still important to the world, no matter how you came to be here. Everyone is connected and you are part of it. Keep you head high, and keep trying.
2007-11-15 03:10:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some states have open records, try that first.
I read your profile but there is some thing wrong, check, Date of birth and other info, it is not matching.
If the adoption was illegal then Date of Birth is very likely wrong too but that is a first place to start, and just hope it is correct. If it is correct then it may be easy to track your origin and the other members of the family.
There are Private Eyes that specialise in this things. But expensive.
2007-11-15 03:10:00 · answer #5 · answered by minootoo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I found the following site simply by putting "illegal US adoptions" in Yahoo's search area. There is an area where you can ask your question and receive an answer from them. I seriously thought about copying/pasting your question on their form, but figured you wouldn't know what was going on if you got a reply and I also wasn't sure if you were still in Missouri. Anyway, the site is www.lawyers.com/ask_a_lawyer/ask_a_question. They don't ask for your full name, but do ask for your email address. The area of law you check is Family Law.
2007-11-15 10:28:40 · answer #6 · answered by jan51601 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some links on black market adoptions are below:
http://www.geocities.com/Heartland/Garden/2313/contents.htm
http://www.exiledmothers.com/adoption_resources/index.html#black_market_adoption
Both also have links to support groups as well.
Not related to Black Market Adoptions, but for support in general, the best forum I know is
http://www.adultadoptees.org/forum
I hope you can join. Good luck.
2007-11-15 23:59:44 · answer #7 · answered by Theresa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋