I have a feeling he is still hung up on his ex wife. He says she is his friend, but he says he has to do this and that because if he doesnt do it, she will take him to court and he will have to pay much more in child support. I dont really call that a friend.
He lets her do his taxes. He pays for her cell phone. She was still on his checking account until I threw a stark raving fit.
She borrows his vehicles to drive and she is made privy to all my personal business. We have dated for about 5 yrs now since about 5 months after his divorce. I did not know him before this time.
She is re married. I think she is keeping her eye on the cash flow in order to get her share by keeping in his financial business which by the way he says is none of my business.
I think he is trying to be more than just her friend. I really believe he is having trouble letting go of the past. What do you think? They are divorced for 4 yrs now.
2007-11-12 15:18:12 · 15 answers · asked by happydawg 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
This has gone on waaaaaaaayyyyyy too long, and for you to try and change it now, won't happen. She has him wrapped and apparently her new husband too if he's allowing her to continue with this kind of relationship with her ex. So do yourself a huge favor, love or no love and MOVE ON!!
I'm divorced and re-married, she is not right for doing those things, but here's the kicker, SHE WOULDN"T BE DOING IT IF THEY DIDN"T LET HER.
No one in this situation is going to change their ways, and you are lucky you don't have to divorce anyone to get out. Let the crazy's have each other.
2007-11-12 16:01:36 · answer #1 · answered by Lina 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are kids there, they have a bond. They will always be close , no matter how ugly their divorce was. His financial business is not yours, where she is concerned. He may be following court orders to pay for certain things , including the kids.
5 months after a divorce is not enough time to recover for most people. He may have been on the rebound, and is rethinking his decision of divorcing her.
Tell him what you have said here, let him know you are not happy about him doting on his ex, the most you can hope for is a reduction in the amount of time spent and things done for her .
This is a very tough situation to be in, good luck to you.
2007-11-12 23:27:13 · answer #2 · answered by I tell it like it is 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If she's remarried, he should have to pay substantially LESS. Child support shoudl remain the same. Let her new husband take care of her and he can take care of half the childs needs. Go ahead and go back to a judge on this one, the reamarried part will always cancel out the sterotypical bias family coirts have towards mothers in custody/support cases.
2007-11-12 23:40:05 · answer #3 · answered by kttphoenix 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Goodness, he needs to step away from his ex-wife, they got divorced for a reason! I wonder what her husband thinks of all of that? Sure, they should maintain an amicable relationship b/c they have kid(s) together, but that seems a bit extreme. I would just keep my opinions about the money to myself since he seems to want to keep you out of that, but I would watch my man if I were you. Good luck!
2007-11-12 23:23:19 · answer #4 · answered by ♀Redheaded Sunshine☼ 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you've been together for 5 years, 5 months after the divorce, but he's only been divorced for 4 years? you are one confused girl!!
anyways. he's obviously not going to let go, and she's going to milk it for all its worth for as long as possible. plain and simple. you didn't mention her new husband making any stinks like you do, so obviously he's accepted it for what it all is, for good or bad. now it's your turn to accept things as they are today, or get packing and move on and beyond all of this. it's not going to change just because you get your panties in a bunch. it's ONLY going to change if he and/or her make it so.
2007-11-12 23:42:29 · answer #5 · answered by celticbuddha 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you started dating him 5 months after his divorce and you've been dating for 5 years, how can they be divorced for 4 year now.
2007-11-12 23:24:15 · answer #6 · answered by CHARLES R 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he's still very attached to her, but I don't think he still wants to be with her. I think they are friends, except the relationship got messed up when she gained the upper hand by getting custody of the kids.
As a step-mom myself, I suggest letting them have their relationship and staying out of it. Getting involved will only piss you off. You'll just have to get used to it. By getting together with him, you have basically acquired his family. And part of this family is his ex wife, like it or not.
2007-11-12 23:29:46 · answer #7 · answered by rorybuns 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, you are just a girlfriend. Do not let your mind make you believe you are more important to him than you are. he may have genuine feelings for you, but he has shared something with this other woman, that he has not shared with you.
As for his finances, it is none of your business. You are not married. Do not act as if you are.
Allowing yourself to think your relationship is something that it is not will only lead you to sorrow.
2007-11-12 23:30:55 · answer #8 · answered by Hubby . 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
watch out she may just want the money and she may not be completely over him yet sit down and talk about it let her know how much this bothers you but be sure to understand there are kids so they gotta communicate if the talking thing don't work you should prolly leave
2007-11-13 15:42:43 · answer #9 · answered by psycho bitch 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's bound to have feeling for a woman he once loved but that doesn't necessarily mean he doesn't love you. Your within your rights to be annoyed but I would communicate these feelings to him. Maybe he doesn't realize that he's still got one foot in the relationship.
2007-11-12 23:25:06 · answer #10 · answered by lenzix5 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋