i know this is bad but my friend has become pregnant and she wants 2 keep the baby but this boy is threating her an saying if shes doesnt give him evidence that shes had an abortion then he will kill himself...she wants to try an fake it an never see him again. an has asked me 2 help i havnt a clue what to suggest maybe thers a letter i cud print off? or something
2007-11-12 10:23:38 · 30 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
look has anyone got any suggestions as to how we can pull this off?
2007-11-12 10:33:25 · update #1
She doesn't owe him anything. He is emotionally abusing her and the only piece of paper she needs to give him is service of a restraining order.
2007-11-12 10:26:48 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 11⤊ 0⤋
You && your friend need to realize that people say stupid things sometimes. If she has decided to keep the baby then she needs to go to an adult (if shes underage) because she nees prenatal care and to see a doctor to have a healthy baby. Waiting is not an option! As far as the boyfriend goes, he neds help, and even if she could present evidence of a fake abortion then its not gonna change anything cause she is still pregnant. (BTW, Abortions are completey confidental and so they wouldn't give you ay paperwork that would count as "evidence") You need to talk to an adult and let them tell you how best to deal with the problem. IE calling the cops. Unfortunately if he is the father he has rights to the child && he needs help if hes gonna be in the babies life.
Best of Luck
2007-11-12 19:59:55 · answer #2 · answered by ♥ Baby on board ♥ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She needs to get the support of her family. This boy also needs some support. Sounds like they are both young and becoming a father is a terrifying thought for him. If people didn't keep trying to convince youngsters that becoming a parent is somehow the worst thing in the world that can happen to you, he would not see it like this. He needs to be reassured the 2 families are there to help, and to make it easier for him to face up to his responsibilities. The girl should not feel threatened by these suicide threats, she can't live her life like that.
He needs to accept unprotected sex leads to fatherhood. He is young, keeping him out of the child's life is not constructive either.
2007-11-12 18:37:57 · answer #3 · answered by Phil McCracken 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If your friend wants to keep her baby then I suggest she does exactly that. I would also suggest she tells the boyfriend to take a hike and if he intends to kill himself to use pills so he doesn't leave a mess for somebody else to clean up. It sounds to me as though she would be far better off without him. He certainly isn't fit to bring up a child anyway. She certainly needs the support of her family right now and the sooner she tells her parents exactly what is going on, the better it will be for her and the baby, the kind of stress she is under now isn't good for either of them. I hope things work out.
2007-11-12 18:50:32 · answer #4 · answered by Luv 2 Larf 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The guy is most likely just threatening to kill himself so she will get the abortion and he is being very immature by doing so. Tell your friend that she needs to be honest with him and just let him know that she is going to keep the baby but she will understand if he doesn't want to be in the child's life- give him the option to be in the child's life or not. You do not need to lie and make him think she had an abortion though. Be honest with him.
Do not let him pressure her into getting an abortion when she wants to keep the baby. It's her body and her decision.
2007-11-12 18:28:11 · answer #5 · answered by Madison 6 · 11⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't try to pull anything off. If your friend wants to keep it, then that's all there is to it. The guy is simply trying to emotionally blackmail her in an especially disgusting way. You should also note that it wont end here if you let him get away with it - he'll threaten suicide whenever he wants something.
It may sound callous - but tell him to go ahead and do it. I would warn his friends/family/someone that he threatened suicide just so someone keeps an eye out; but your friend should not be bullied like this.
2007-11-12 18:47:38 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Tell his parent and call the police and get a restraining order.
He wont kill himself, hes just trying to manipulate your friend.
If he would prepare to kill a baby than take responsibility then bye bye mate!
Tell your friend to contact the police for her and the baby safety. Might be an idea to move homes too x
2007-11-13 03:30:55 · answer #7 · answered by XPINKX 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You and your friend need to talk to an adult about the guy. It sounds like he has some mental issues he needs to deal with. Also threatening to kill himself if she doesn't abort the baby is really not fair to your friend. It's her body and her decision. She should not have to fake an abortion. Besides... he'll find out in about 6 months or so that she didn't have one because she'll start showing now. Please tell someone so he can get some help.
2007-11-12 18:28:01 · answer #8 · answered by N and A's Momma 7 · 9⤊ 0⤋
Your friend shouldn't allow herself to be emotionally blackmailed, this guy is just trying to say he will kill himself to manipulate the situtation. Sounds harsh, but she really has to tell him to do what he thinks is best.
I doubt you could print off something that would look convincing enough and I'd doubt that clinics give such proof out anyway. The only way you could do it is to make an appointment, they will send you a letter confirming the date and time and show him that. But IMHO this is really not the way to go. The only way this is going to get sorted is by honesty, particularly with the boys' parents. If he's old enough to procreate, he's old enough to deal with the consequences.
2007-11-12 18:43:50 · answer #9 · answered by ☼ Jules ☼ 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋
This lad is emotionally blackmailing her. Tell him to go and stuff himself. She is not responsible for him in any way, shape or form and if he decides to kill himself thats entirely his choice and nothing to do with anyone. Nobody who is entirely healthy minded would ever say such a thing anyway. She should, in any event, having nothing more to do with him (and if thats the case, I'm afraid ethically, child support is not fair on him). You must not get caught in the middle or tell lies at this point. It may backfire on you which is totally unfair. Tell your friend you will support her but not lie for her. A good friend will appreciate that.
2007-11-12 18:33:05 · answer #10 · answered by AUNTY EM 6 · 5⤊ 0⤋
CLAIRE,
IT'S SAD WHEN PEOPLE WANT TO GI/GIVE OTHERS ULTIMATUMS. IF YOUR FRIEND WANTS TO KEEP HER BABY GOD BLESS HER.
THERE ARE LOTS OF PEOPLE THAT CAN'T EVEN HAVE KIDS.
I KNOW OF A LADY WHO CAN'T, WANTS TO ADOPT A BABY, BUT THE MOTHER HAS A LAST MINUTE CHANGE OF HEART. SHE'S DEVASTATED AFTER 2 BABY SHOWERS AND A READY TO USE NURSERY.
TELL YOUR BOY TO THINK OF OTHERS RATHER THAN HIMSELF.
YOU CAN'T FAKE AN ABORTION FOR LONG. EVENTUALLY THE TUMMY WILL SHOW.
FIND A DIFFERENT BF.
2007-11-12 18:56:51 · answer #11 · answered by Dr. Albert, DDS, (USA) 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋