Has anyone else ever felt "odd"?

Question

I've never felt like I've fit in, ever. I've never liked parties or crowds of any kind. The majority of people's idea of fun-loud parties, dancing, bars, etc., has never been my idea of fun. Many people throughout my life have told me that I need to quit being such an odd ball, but that's just me. I'd rather do something quiet and peaceful like artwork, or reading, or taking a long walk at a nature preserve. I've been this way since I was a small child, so I suppose I'll never fit in. Has anyone else ever felt alone in a world of people?

**Goldwing, I didn't give you thumbs down! There is not ONE answer here that merits a thumbs down, so if there is a TROLL here, kindly back off!

And thanks to all, I'm happy to know that I'm not the only one who feels this way!

What I meant about the thumbs down is, I'm not the one giving the thumbs down. I don't want anyone to think I gave Goldwing, or anyone thumbs down.

***How am I ever going to choose a best answer??!! These are all terrific, wish we could choose "runner up" best answers!

Answer 1

But you DO fit in...into your world...and your world needn't be other's worlds...I am quite sure you have enjoyed your way of life, otherwise you would have changed it. I have enjoyed both sides of the coin, from owning a huge disco/caberet, to being alone for extended lengths of time...never felt lonely in either situation...There is NO reason to feel odd, for to you, I am sure you feel the partiers are odd that they have to surround themselves with external motivation....it takes all kinds in this world, and many are like you, many are like me, and many are just plain nuts! :-) Goldwing

Answer 2

Yes I have felt that way for years. I do have social anxiety. I do not feel comfortable in large crowds. I am not a party animal but I often wish that I could just let go and have fun. I have discovered over the years that I need to be able to "connect' people to have fun. I need first of all to like then somewhat and then to feel comfortable around them. I am usually uncomfortable around a bunch of strangers. ONe on one I do pretty good though.
I do love to dance though. I like to two step and in the area where I live we have 3 or 4 'dances' within 50 miles of here where people gather to dance. They are family oriented, no drinking allowed and really laid back. I went there for yrs and only got to know a handful of people. I guess that I am very picky in who I hang with.

Answer 3

Yes, I think that maybe it comes from being an only child. I do like being with people but when I chose, and like to be able to leave when I want to. I like my own company, and have a relationship where my partner works away, and that suits me fine, as I can have the best of both worlds. My jobs take me into situations where there are many people but that is for a limited time, and I know when I am going to go home.I like being alone and am never lonely. I have lots of friends but we are not in each others pockets all the time.Parties are ok for a couple of hours but the one thing that drives me nuts is small talk.

Answer 4

Yes, sometimes I've felt like a square peg trying to fit into a round hole. But I don't mind. Being alone is not the same as being lonely, or at least not for me. I enjoy social interaction with people but I also enjoy time spent just with me. And I'd much rather be alone than be in a crowd of unpleasant or annoying people. Those of us who enjoy our own company and don't have to rely on others to make us happy are lucky indeed.

Answer 5

I don't think you are odd at all. I love your answers they always seem to be right on.
I think alot of people feel like you, including me. I have always felt shy and never could carry on a conversation without a stammer. I just never seemed I was good enough or fit in with any crowd. I am still shy but I really don't worry too much what people think. I do worry if they think i am unkind though. It has been a work in progress but I am liking me and don't think I am as worthless as when I was young.
Just be you the oddball that you are, your true friends will love you!!

Answer 6

Oh Contraire...there are many people like you (us). I too enjoy solitude and quiet, though I do go to "some" parties when invited. I am very much a loner...maybe that is why I have no friends to speak of. Sometimes it is lonely, but there are times that I would rather be lonely, rather than suffer the foolishness of others. I don't mean that to sound snobbish, but drunken, obnoxious, overbearing, brash people just don't do it for me. To each their own, but try not to feel that you are an oddball. It takes many different types of people to make this world go around.

Answer 7

Alone
by Edgar Allan Poe

From childhood's hour I have not been
As others were; I have not seen
As others saw; I could not bring
My passions from a common spring.
From the same source I have not taken
My sorrow; I could not awaken
My heart to joy at the same tone;
And all I loved, I loved alone.
Then- in my childhood, in the dawn
Of a most stormy life- was drawn
From every depth of good and ill
The mystery which binds me still:
From the torrent, or the fountain,
From the red cliff of the mountain,
From the sun that round me rolled
In its autumn tint of gold,
From the lightning in the sky
As it passed me flying by,
From the thunder and the storm,
And the cloud that took the form
(When the rest of Heaven was blue)
Of a demon in my view.

Looks like you and I and Poe and lots of others are in the same solitary row boats. "Blessed are the solitary, the elect. They shall enter the kingdom because they come from it." Jesus, Gospel of Thomas. Time alone is time to contemplate.

Answer 8

I hate to have to be the one to tell you, but, you do fit in here, just perfectly.

It's such a big world out there, and we're just individuals in the cosmos.

Being the unique creatures that we are, there are some that prefer being part of an ongoing whirlwind. And then, there are those that prefer the quiet silence that only solitude can bring. It's enriching for the soul.

My Dad taught me a love of silence and lack of confusion.

Answer 9

Fortunately! not everyone is a party animal! They'd sure like you to think that they are the majority, though. They are usually people who are insecure, out of touch with themselves, & crave the acceptance of others. This often gets them in trouble! They mistake temporary thrills for fun, & fun for happiness. They can be surrounded by a myriad of other people, & yet feel terribly lonely... Why would anyone want to be like that? I never did. I enjoy peace & quiet! Reading, Bible study, practicle crafts, animals, gardening, harmonious music, singing, & sharing what I enjoy with others--'one (or two) on one'. (;

When growing up, sometimes my family would play a game... Scrabble was a favorite. Mom was/is a competitive soul. To keep from being bored between turns (we didn't time turns), I always volunteered as score keeper. However, I eventually realized that the competition air was eating away at the enjoyment I could get from just playing the game. So, I quit keeping score, & Mom thereafter had to count mine herself! I also changed the way I picked which words to play. While trying to win, I looked for words to place in the highest-scoring spots, using the letters with the highest scores. That was great for developing & maintaining math skills, but not particularly enjoyable. Winning is a vanity, & not much of a thrill... The new method I used for deciding where to play what words, was built around my new goals:

1. to place the longest word possible, in the most vacant areas of the board, thereby opening them up for everyone's use. (So, I avoided the crowded areas for as long as possible.)
2. to place rarely occuring letters (in the game) where they could be easily re-used to make another word.
3. to avoid the anxiety always associated with competition... I now view playing games as enjoyable practice of whatever skills are required, as well as time to visit.

(My parents were born in 1915 & 1917, so are members of the depression era... I believe that the importance of being practicle did rub off on me! Mom was 40 yo when I was born, so I grew up with parents about 15 years older than many of my peers. Plus, I was the 'baby' of 4 kids... I also had medical problems that affected what I was capable of. So, yes, I was always 'on the outside', occasionally 'looking in'. Usually there was at least one other person like that, & we would become buddies.)

"Odd"? I remember telling people that we were "all just figments of our imaginations... So, I guess I was probably considered a bit odd, by some... (;

Don't worry... unless someday you find that you ARE fitting into the party / me-first / competitive lifestyle. That'll be PAST time to have begun being concerned! (;

Answer 10

I have gone through my party phase. But have always had the need to withdraw from everyone and have quiet. It helps me maintain my sense of peace. If I stay to busy, around noise, whether it be people, the tv always on, out in traffic, in stores I feel this strong need to get away. Shut everything down and get centered again.
Relish being odd--it is a good thing.

Answer 11

Your statement with this question sounds like you have found peace in the quiet things of life... That doesn't make you odd it shows that you have been blessed as few people in this world are.

It is the ones who have to be constantly entertained or in a large boisterous party who are truly odd because they never find the peace that comes from being comfortable in their own skin.